Hi everyone
Still making my way around the forum. I apologize if this has been mentioned before. Does anyone have any magic related suggestions for dealing with a physically and emotionally abusive mother? I live with her currently and I’m trying to escape the situation. I don’t say anything, don’t hit her back or anything like that. Respect for parents was really engrained in me. I came back and gave up a lot, modeling contract, financial freedom, happiness, relationship etc out of an obligation to take care of my mother as her daughter. But my mother is a narcissist and I’ve recently realized she will never change.
In return, it’s been pure hell. I’ve really lost everything and I want to cut the ties. I’ve reached my breaking point and not only do I want out of this situation but I can’t stomach being in her space for more than 2 hours and that’s a real challenge. Right now I want to move out as soon as possible but I gave up a job, car and any ability to make moves without her or my father’s approval to take care of her and now that she’s feeling better, I want out permanently.
In terms of just getting up and leaving…I’ve Been isolated so long that I don’t have any friends in the area. I literally have no other place to go at this moment. I am focusing on discreetly trying to find work whether online or in person and save up and move out that way. It’s been years of this and now that I’m in my early 30’s I’m really tired of it.
I finally managed to graduate from college, there’s someone I’m romantically interested in that, currently isn’t available (but I’m hoping magic will change that) that I had to give up years ago because of my mother.
I always feel guilty or afraid to stand against my mother but I’m not like that with other people. So part of the reason I was on this forum was to hopefully seek advice with this matter.
You dont have any obligation to care for someone who abuses you.
Remember that, even if she will make you feel guilty (narcissists always do that).
Get a job, save money, get your own place. You can still visit her and help her. But you decide when it’s time to go. Shes your mother and you love her, but you need to draw a line.
I’ve been in your situation. Trust me, get your own place. And DO NOT FEEL GUILTY.
I’m not going to tell you what you need to do yes you do need to leave and find your own again it won’t be hard since you did it before…but
If you have had enough why are you still there…
If you want to go why haven’t you moved…
If this isn’t what you want then why are you taking it…
You are a grown woman now they have no say so in what you do their job is done…but until you start puffing out your chest until you start speaking up…no amount of magic or demons will be able to help you since your own resolve isn’t where it needs to be yet…you want magic to help best thing I can do is call on King paimon and Lord marcosious…king paimon will open the doors you need to open and Lord marcosious will make you strong enough to walk through them…if you take my advice you will have what you need and be alot happier but if not then right there tells you you aren’t truly ready to let go you can love your parents and still live far I know what your going through my mom is nuts but I stood up for my self at 18 I packed up what I could carry took my daughter and left it was hard but I made a choice that was best for the both of us …
You gotta figure out what is best for you…
Stay ND be nothing while doing everything for them and not have anything
Or
Leave and become your own person of success ownly you can decide and when you do I know your determination will make you move
Most older people act that way due to living lives filled with regret. It’s probably not personal, and you’re probably the target because she feels guilty for putting you in that situation, and therefore she probably assumes that by acting towards you in such a manner she could thus motivate you to get your life back on track again. Don’t always think the worst of your parents unless their actions are harming your chances in life.
In a pack of wolves when an alpha gets too old to lead, they either kill him or he wanders off to die alone. Ancestors and packs are important.
Thank you. Too be honest, I was driving a few days ago and she was at an atm machine. It took everything inside me not to run her over. I kept getting this loud voice In my head saying to just do it so you can be free.
Weirdly this is was a couple days after I think, I say that because I’m still figuring it out, that I had multiple signs and a convo with Asmodeus. It was the strangest thing because it was like someone else was in control.
Needless to say that if there is love there, it’s instinct. Too many years of abuse just make me loath her.
I do sometimes wonder if I should return the abuse but… Shrugs
Like I said before, get your own place, get your own life. You will feel alot better, believe me. I understand your feelings, but shes not worth it in my opinion. she already ruined your past, dont let her ruin your future.
Abusing the abuser may seem like an act of justice, but if it is, is still an act of justice that makes you the same thing you loath.
For what you said, you don’t seem to really want revenge. So it seems it all comes to one starting point: money to get a place. From there you can get everything else in place. I don’t think there is much more to say. If you have a degree, then it should be easier.
wow…seriously, just leave. Nobody should have that much power over you where you contemplate messing up your future for them. Nobody. If you have nowhere to go, go to a shelter. If you don’t want to go to a shelter, go to a hotel, go somewhere. The longer you stay and stew in your hatred towards her, the longer you’ll be miserable.
I totally understand where you are coming from, your mother made sure you had to be dependent on her. There are several things I recommend for reclaiming yourself and your life.
Move far away, don’t announce your plans, just do it and tell later.
Engage in some type of talk therapy so you can heal; I would recommend a certain newer desensitizing technique used on those who have PSTD.
Enter into romantic relationships very carefully and slowly until you’ve done the healing work you need to do on yourself because of your vulnerability. Chances are you can attract and pull in a romantic partner who would control and abuse you like your mother.
You’re young enough to still have a full life–get out and live it. There can be no regrets and don’t allow y ourself to feel guilty or bad about claiming your life.
The best way to kill a narcissist is to ignore them. My mother and I had to go through a satiation with my great grand mother. Cut the cord and gain back your freedom.
I would agree with finding work and moving far away once you have the means to. It’s not an easy choice, but as you said, it is likely she will not change.
You could use a banishment or cutting cords ceremony to help establish that boundary and get the ball going.
I would also recommend therapy or some form of counseling to help with any emotional scars created from said environment. If you cannot afford traditional therapy, there is an app out there called Better Help which is around $40 to $70 per month compared to $75-$150 per hour on average via therapist office.
Are you willing to report the abuse to law enforcement? That’s one way of drawing a line (I have ZERO tolerance for this crap because of growing up seeing a close relative be viciously abused by her mentally ill mother).
Does she have a health care directive? It might be time to look into full-time care by professionals who know how to safely deal with violent, unstable people.
Do you have any trustworthy friends with a spare bedroom (or even just a spare sofa)? Also, make sure your family can’t access your bank accounts.
And do a binding! It won’t hurt her, but it should take some air out of her bitch tire.
Narcissists crave attention. Cut her off as soon as you possibly can and find a good therapist or support group.
I have been in the same situation. Raised by a sociopath. I have moved out in my 20ies but she still did not leave me alone calling me all the time with different requests, embarassing me before my colleagues at work and before my partner’s family, even showing up on my vacations with my partner. She passed away 2 years ago and before passing away she cursed me. I guess I still suffer from her curses and I do not know what to do.
I think I once read about the spirit who can help to get away from people…
But I forgot the book …
But if you can pm me …so I can have a way to contact you and when I find the name of the spirit I will tell you!!..
For reference’s sake I am going to include some personal history. I grew up the only child of a Mother who is as follows. She is a narcissist, a psychopath, and alcoholic and an abuser. I was nineteen and finally had enough. I took all of the belongings that I could carry and ran. She abused me mentally and it took years to overcome the Stockholm syndrome and the PTSD is ongoing.
You deserve a better life. You are on the right track because you know deep down she probably will not change. My Mother, I hoped and worked towards reconciliation and nothing positive came from that. I managed to get stationed three miles from where they lived and went home and cooked them dinner. But her racism became apparent and the relationship with a mother that I had hoped for, came crashing down.
Once I removed them both from my life I felt freer and lighter to live my life as I would. You deserve to feel this way. To live and be loved purely for who you are. Not who your parents want. I am more than happy to talk to you anytime about this for moral support. Just let me know.
