[quote=“sunas, post:5, topic:3114”]Yes supposedly means i am unsure.
I would like to be able to remember my dreams, i would like to be able to know what goes on with me at night, i would like to know many things that i don’t know… i am really just a beginner on all of this, even though sometimes my mind gives me so much information, it feels like i know everything, but i don’t.
I made once a ritual to Lilith to call for one succubus…
I ended up with some spirit that says itself to be called Anksha…
I never really got to really know who or what is Anksha…
But it was Anksha who told me that the pain in my back was caused by Namaah while i was sleeping…
The reason for it ?
I am their plaything, i asked for it…
So i can’t really complain, but i would just like to be Aware of it! All!
And i am not =/
Edit : Like for example, Defectron says that he is using the energy that is being stolen from me to do something, he says that the spirits around me around bound to me by him and that he uses them and me to whatever it is, i really don’t know anything about it! Sometimes i feel like i am completely lost and i know nothing…this is one of those times… i wish i could see more, know more…[/quote]
Well I’ll give you some clues, as you said you wanted this so you can’t really complain. Now one point of confusion in the past is you believed yourself to be serving lillith while the spirit boss I know isn’t her. I actually found out why this is, Lillith actually serves under that other spirit. The spirit boss in question is actually something that doesn’t get fully developed untilt he far future. Lillith is a spirit from the past and this spirit doesn’t fully develope until much later in the future. How does that work? Well the thing is the past , the future and the present, its all really just the same thing, time doesn’t work how people think it does.
As for what the energy is going to that’s something I don’t talk about online.