I dont know if it’s quite the right category for this. I am new to certain things but I’ve actually been doing spells and meditating since I was 4. I honestly had no reason to think of doing so as a child either, coming from a strict Christian family. But I’ve had to learn on my own in secret so it’s been rough learning more and more new things which is why I placed this in this category.
Now onto the main topic. Growing up I used to see spirits. And I used to see the future in my dreams and easily speak with spirits in my dreams. I also have astral planes (I remember looking down upon my sleeping self from the corner of my ceiling and having a distinct knowledge and feeling that I was a physical form there.) But a few things happened.
1 - I gave myself a black eye in my right side (dominant side) that was so bad I couldnt open it for 3 months. After that I needed glasses. After that. No more spirits. Dont know if the glass from the glasses messes that up or if it’s my eyes, as I can sometimes see things out if the corner of my eyes.
2 - I died. We were camping and I died of hypothermia because my parents didnt think to keep me awake after I got wet in a freezing lake. I know I died because I was in a dark place for a long time then came out somewhere that was all fields and flowers. With mountainous areas, crystal clear water, fruit trees and plants everywhere. And only animals. I was about to take a step in when a voice said it wasnt time yet. And I got forceably sucked back through the darkness and woke up to my mom laying near me and saying my name while shaking my shoulder. She said I wasnt breathing and it worried her. After that. No more future dreams.
3- when I was 16 i had 3 dreams of one demon. He kept saying my soul belonged to him. That if I agreed he’d return my true power to me. He’d make me who I truly am. As I said I grew up in a heavily Christian environment. With fear of gods wrath implanted in my mind. I knew he wanted me to say the word “Deal” but I said NO. 2 more dreams of me saying no and every other ability went away. I even used to dream of this mansion many nights. That had one room I just couldnt ever get into but I needed to. And that dream stopped too.
I need to know if theres anything I can do to return all of that to myself. It honestly drives me insane that I dont dream almost at all anymore. If anyone can help I’d appreciate. I need to know who the demon from my dream was too. But nobody’s ever been able to answer that question. But thank you for any help.