Big day today, I decided to start the Temple of Ascending Flame work, the first 7 days “intro” rituals to see if this is the kind of work you want to do, and oh DO I!
Day 1:
I prepared my space as best as I knew how, after all I was evoking Lucifer, you don’t half ass that preparation. I meditated to relax the mind and body and prepare myself. I performed an invoking Ritual of the Pentagram (sic Hermetic Qabalah Foundation version, no with arch angels) I clensed and purified the temple and circle, and anointed myself with Oil of Abramelon. I was finally ready, I faced South, I had a printed picture of Lucifer Sigil that I really like.
And the material I needed for the evocation and meditation. I called to Lucifer in the name of the Dragon over and over until I felt the presence in my Temple. The following is directly from my journal after the experience:
In the room which was the gateway to the Nightside, I saw the black portal. Inside I saw the fiery red, horned, giant Lucifer normally I would not visualize him like this but it is what the mediation required and for a bit I just visualized Him, the Throne (made of gold) and his throne “room”. After the initial inspection he reached out his hand in offering. I accepted and I saw my astral form be taken through the portal into his domain. The translucent room was shaped as a sphere, outside was stars and cosmic energy. Inside gold and green flames lined the sphere and surrounded the room. Lucifer gestured to his throne and then to the cosmos almost as if saying “this could be yours”. I of course did not feel worthy and did no sit on the throne. He then directed me to the flames, I reached my hand inside and the energy went into my body (astral and real). The power filled me but it was subtle, not overwhelming. In fact the entire experience was just…welcoming and loving almost, nothing was overwhelming or baneful. Soon after the fire entered me I saw his sigil burn into my third eye and over my heart chakra. As he showed me wonders of cosmic forces swriling around us, motions of the universe (I honestly forget now and even when writing my journal most of what he showed me) I felt a sudden inspiration and said to Him.
“Thank you Bright Star for liberating Human’s, and for continuing to liberate us and helping us in our ascension”. For if it were not for his influence we may be stuck in ignorance and blissful animal nature of endless and mindless reproduction. Soon after he told me it was time to leave, so I did.
After just experiencing the energy humming in the air and the calm, peaceful, welcoming feeling I took one last task. I knew the Lucifer’s presence was still near by so I blessed my Leviathan Deck in the name of the Dragon and in the presence of Lucifer, and set it to task to guide and assist me any way I saw fit while on this Path of Ascension.
I came out of it all with one thought on my mind. I love Lucifer.
Day 2:
This ritual had me invite Lucifer into my temple, I did so. He came into my Temple standing very close to me. I could feel the presence there. A giant, larger then the room, inflamed horned god. He placed his finger upon my third eye and energy immediately flowed into me. My third eye area especially vibrated and became alive. The energy quickly moved through my body and around me. I concentrated and let the fiery energy build up through my spine and chakras until it burst through my third eye as a fiery dragon. The flaming wings spread from my back and I became an astral fiery serpent. The energy was amazing, eventually after a minute it became more subtle and I just held the form for a few minutes, even now I feel the fiery eye upon my brow and the inner fire serpent ready to come out. This was a quick but powerful Path working.
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I am really feeling Lucifer enfluencing me. Here is a snipped from a conversation earlier.
P: Why are you afraid of yourself?
Me: Because there is a great darkness inside me, just as there is a great light. I don’t know what it is capable of, what I Am capable of. I know they are both me. An angel of light and darkness, servant to neither, lover to both.
(at this point something just came over me and I wrote on)
So right now, in his place and time, I am free to fly, free to soar and let my soul shine within the darkness of oppression, let it bear the light for others to follow or hate. I care not, for it is my expression I paint on this canvas of reality.
Day 3:
Very similar to Day 2, the energy was immense for a short time, I focused on the dragon site to see through illusions and the dragon breath to feel the power of the universe. I sent my intention to take on this form in my dreams tonight, I will document when that happens. Oh and I now have a minor headache.
So my dream that I remember most was interesting. I did not take on the form of a fiery dragon. But, in this dream I was joining a somewhat secret Order (obviously a reflection of the work I am doing) and in the final induction ceremony I was asked “Did you manifest the dragon in your dream”. So clearly it was in the back of my mind even at that time. My response was “I honestly don’t remember, but I feel as if I had for I have an emotional memory of it but not a visual memory”. They were somewhat put off by the answer, technically it was acceptable but not what they wanted to hear. The rest of the dream was a bit odd, the final ritual involved blood and sex magick to transfer the secrets of the universe…maybe it was just a kinky way for guys to get laid I don’t know. But I had an issue with it because while they were fine using their partners and others who did not know what was happening, I wanted my partner to be fully aware and accepting of the rite. So in the end I never really finished it because I kept searching.
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I don’t like having hope by using rituals which donnot understand. I prefer to strengthen my trust by being unable to flee from it’s value according to my logic.
In traditional religions in which Gnosticism is for the elites like them of the Vatican rituals are only show empty of energetic background.
I never did Bardon’s exercises until I believed to understand the target and deeper senses and by suggesting to having understood that mostly ever I had the choice to change the steps as long as the outcome, the ability in extremo was the same.
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I wasn’t able to perform my nightly rituals, but I went through an initiation all the same. Many emotions and thoughts that have been brewing for years, but have been really hammering in on me the last few days (no surprise there considering the Work) came to the surface pretty hard. Some realization came to me that I wasn’t expecting, some of these thoughts I knew about before but I am coming to really understand them.
- The need for affection, love, is an attachment and a form of emotional slavery.
- One should still enjoy love and friendship, but without needing it.
- If others are willing to live without you, then live without them, you never really live with them anyways.
- Live the life you want, not the one you believe someone else wants from you. If they choose to leave or end the relationship then so be it, that is their choice and it frees you from their chains.
All those points are probably self evident, but fully embracing them can be hard for those who have deep emotions and self-doubt.
- The future is an illusion, burn that illusion.
Big night! a lot of important work, took 3 hours to complete it all, but time well spent. First I worked with material from Hermetic Qabalah Foundation for the O:.A:., that helped put me in the right frame of mind for opening myself up. And as it also includes a banishing, it was good preparation for later rites.
The big part of tonight for me was the Rite of Union (this is a person ritual I devised). It is purely dedicated to Babalon and allows the practitioner to utilize the essence of creation for the manifestation of a purpose. I only perform this rite once every few months because it is very powerful. The practitioner must surrender utterly to the Universe, the light and darkness equally. As spirits enjoy extremes, the ritual can get extreme at times. I have yet to have anything beyond pure raw sexual and pain energy experiences. Typically at the end I feel completely in Union with Babalon and Chaos, the absolute conduit of the cycle of creation. It is very euphoric, often leaving me sweaty, high, and with a mess to clean up. Tonight I channeled the energy for a special friend, to allow her hearts desires be manifested, I look forward to hearing all about it.
The last bit for tonight, was Day 4 of the Temple of Ascending Flame work. Coming off the high of the last ritual, evoking Lucifer came quickly and fully. I was seeing sparks around the flames, a heavy energy aura filled the circle and room, it was clear the call was answered. I went through the actions as outlined for day 4, when it got to the point where I looked into Lucifer’s eyes, he laughed, applauded, bowed slightly (maybe mocking). Like I was a little dragon welp that just learned to fly. He showed me how to expand and contract the fire to expand the auras influence, he watched me for a bit, laughed a few more times and then close the portal.
Afterwords I worked a bit on vision control and astral projecting. I tried the technique of visualizing an empty body in front of me and filling it with my consciousness, this worked to a point, my mental visualizing sharpened but I still felt connected to my body overall. Just something I need to work on. I really want to get to the point of complete disconnect. I have performed path working and remote viewing plenty of times, but not complete disconnect from my body.
In Nomine Babalon, Do Omnium.
I feel very relieved and light hearted today. I have been struggling with some major emotions the last few days, no surprise there. And I think I have adjusted well. Time will tell of course.
One thing I forgot to mention in my blog from last night, I consecrated my new ritual dagger! It literally came in yesterday afternoon, perfect timing for a huge ritual night. I consecrated it in the Grail of Babalon after the Rite of Union was performed. And I consecrated it with my Blood and Will. It is no longer a knife, it is an extension of my Will.
Now I just need some ideas about what to put on the big ring on the handle. I was thinking of a talisman or some sort of charm.
Day 5 of Temple of Ascending Flame into project:
I was a bit confused on the instructions, it did not specify to continue with the previous meditation first and then move forward. I decided to follow the instruction, entered the starry realm and found a path to Lucifer’s throne. I saw two paths initially, a black door and a white door, soon a third path became noticeable but not visible. This was the unseen path in between. I went to the door and said “Daaleth” and the door opened. In front of me was the stair case leading to Lucifer’s throne. I walked up the stairs, at times I saw fire around me. When I looked in the distance I saw numerous other stairs all leading to the throne room high above. Some had occupants also walking up. I reached the top and saw a massive golden throne, it was more light and energy then it was solid. All around was a garden of green and red flames. I stood there, basking in the moment of peace and tranquility. After a few minutes I turned and started walking back down the stairs, almost immediately I looked back, wanting to return. But I finished my journey back to the mundane world.
Day 6:
I started a bit tired, not feeling completely connected with what was going on. At the point where I was suppose to stare at the sigil and chant I decided to this time close my eyes, see the vigil in my mind and chant. This worked very well, the energy noticeably changed and I felt Lucifer’s presence. I moved forward with the meditation, I will admit some of it may have been a bit rushed but it still felt complete. I then got to the part where I flew up to Lucifer’s throne room. I called for Lucifer to come several times and then he appeared in the throne room. I told him to ignite my soul with the Ascending Flame, he did so and what was a standard meditation suddenly turned vibrant. I could feel my soul vibrate from inside. A moment of euphoria swept through me, the column of fire burst forth. While my body vibrated my head felt different, not sure the best words to describe it.
Afterwords I just sat staring at a candle in front of me. I could see its energy billowing all around, I could sense the energy all around me as if it was part of me. I just sat there for several minutes, being one with my environment. In my mind I said “I have accepted the Ascending Flame”, I felt another small vibration, like a stirring but it died down quickly.
Day 7:
The day of reflection and truly I can’t believe only seven days has gone by. So much has happened over the last seven days. From meeting a new friend, having emotional upheaval, some self realization and acceptance of the inevitable, and of course experiencing Lucifer’s energy.
Before I found Temple of Ascending Flame I honestly didn’t think I would ever work with Lucifer. Not that I was opposed to Him or His message. I respected what the Light Bringer brought to humanity. I just wasn’t interested. Then the day before finding Temple of Ascending Flame a person randomly contacted me on Instagram, she had been trying to evoke Lucifer and talk with him for a while. She asked me if I could do a reading to determine why Lucifer didn’t want to work with her. I agreed though I went into with some hesitation because I knew that to get that answer, well Lucifer was going to need to assist with the reading. That was actually my first contact with his energy and I guess I drew his attention.
The next day I found the Temple of Ascending Flame and the requirements to begin working with them. I eagerly ventured forth. I remember being a bit nervous during the first meditation. I used blood magick on the seal, and followed the instructions as best as I could remember for each path working. As you can see from my Day 1 journal entry, that first meeting went very well and I left it with unexpected feelings.
From that day on I had a new revelation or experience, each taught me something. Some of it was pure passion, some of it was emotional distress. All of it was destroying the illusions that are around me.
I have no qualms about working with the Temple, I look forward to it assuming I am accepted. I have no fear of Lucifer, I embrace His light. I think in many ways I was already on the Draconian Path, it fits a lot of my personal beliefs long before I ever heard of them.
Burn bright!
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My current standing altar setup.
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A lot of transformation occurring lately. Every night after my meditations I feel, different. Today I feel very, airy, like I could walk on the air or slit my throat and laugh. I must be dancing in the Night of Pan, hypnotized by his eyes of starlight! But I digress.
Last night was a very interesting experience. Even before the nightly practice I could feel a hint of lust within me. Nothing too unusual. But after the rituals I felt aflame with raw lust. I am not talking about being horny, that is a mundane experience. I mean raw lust. I wanted to be consumed and to consume all (trying to not use too graphical of language).
I went to bed and just couldn’t stop touching my body. Visions of succubi riding me, touching me, playing with me, danced through my mind and my body responded in kind. Mostly female but in the height of the passions, even male. At one point I almost completed the act without even touching myself at all.
And then a voice spoke through me, a very feminine voice at that. Some of the things she was saying:
“I want to love all but I am in darkness and no one will play with me”.
“Come to me, love me, I will love you and consume you, be with me!”
Yea, it was pretty exotic and powerful and absolutely like nothing I have experienced before. Funny thing was I didn’t even “complete” the act, I was too busy riding the energy and eventually I slipped into sleep. I could tell that the energy/entity/inner psyche was a bit disappointed that things could not come to a conclusion.
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As I was accepted into the the initial course for the TAF I will be writing more about that and my experiences. I have not started the daily work yet, I am currently reading through the material. I should be starting the daily work on Monday.
Tonight I did my routine work for the O:.A:. probationary term. But prior to the LPR I went through some basic Kandulini energy work. I did not vibrate or really visualize the colors for each Chakra, but I visualized and felt the energy rising through each chakra with each inhale of breath, and solidify with each exhale. I could feel the energy rising up my spine area though it was not an intense experience or anything. By the time I reached Ajna the energy really came together strong. I performed this routine three times throughout my nightly work, and the third time when I passed the energy to the Sahasrara chakra the energy exploded out and then showered down over my body. I know I did not have a Kandulini awakening or anything, but the energy was moving nicely and more intense then I was expecting. Granted I have been doing similar type of work for years off and on, so I am not surprised by the energy movement. I look forward to working on that process more formally.
Now that I have read more about Kandulini I know I had an awakening fifteen years ago. I had an experience that was identical to what is described by an awakening. And since I was not really ready for it, it did lead to massive depression a few weeks later, though at the time that depression was actually both necessary and partly based on spell work I did to get out of a situation that required drastic results.
I remember after that awakening I had a lot of psychic abilities awaken. I knew everything around me without having to see it. I knew conversation that were going to happen long before they did (down to the exact words and gestures), I also had full prophetic site about my future and a connection to the “source” I have never replicated. And it is that state of being that I have spent 15 years trying to achieve again, little did I know it was Kandulini.
I look forward to my future working with TAF and the LHP in general.
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It has been ten days since my last little update. Pretty busy ten days. To start with I have been working on the Introduction Course for Temple of Ascending Flame after I was accepted as an “outer” member. I was happy to see that there are actually a couple of people who live very close to me that are active members, kinda rare considering the small number of active members and the fact that the main Temple is based in Poland, and I am on the West Coast of the U.S.
The first week has been focusing on working with the Dragon/Leviathan energy directly and working on Kandulini. Working with the Draconian Current has been interesting. Starting to incorporate the pantheon of (Hecate, Sutuach, Lucifer, Belial, Lilith, and Arachne) into my daily practice. Yesterday was the first day that I did a standard LRP, and then an invocation LRP with the pantheon, but going counter clock wise. This was pretty powerful symbolically.
I spoke briefly with @Asenath_Mason, she was very nice and patient with my ramblings. I hope to work more with her and the Temple in the future, maybe even a trip out to Poland one of these years if things work out.
I performed a sex ritual and dedicated it to Hecate the other day. Here is a picture of the improvised altar I created for the work.
Imagine laying down in such a way that when you looked forward between your legs you can see the skull and candles burning, was very powerful and an amazing experience. I won’t go into further details for obvious reasons.
Lately I have been studying astrology and tarot further, as well as working on Kandulini exercises. I also have been reading Visions of the Nightside, some pretty interesting essays. One essay written by Bill Duvendack alludes that demon’s may be the spiritual evolution of Dinosaurs. Essentially when they were wiped out by the Meteor, they continued to live and evolve in the Astral Realm. Interesting thought, modern images of demon’s could certainly look like dinosaurs.
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A very intense night. As it was later then usual my mind was already relaxed. After the relaxation meditation to get into a deep trance I did meditations. When I got to the Pathworking: The Ascending Flame of Lucifer, Lucifer came into my Temple my entire body began to vibrate uncontrollably, not so much as to throw me out of the trance but still quite noticeable. After experiencing being a Fire Dragon I opened my eyes and concentrated on the deer skull I have which I place my candles around. I was still heavily in a trance at this time and I kept saying a mantra “I can see and hear manifestations of spirits, demons and angels”. I repeated this several times. First I noticed an inverted triangle in the center of the skull and then inside the triangle I saw a glowing golden light that began to grow and take shape. After a minute of the mantra and focusing on the glowing light my fire alarm went off. That was very unfortunate, as I was seeing a manifestation of the energy on my altar. It was also strange because the fire alarm has never gone off before from just my candles.
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An interesting week. I spent every night for the last 6 days invoking and working with Lilith and her many aspects/children (Marag, Ama, Rimog, Samalo, Naamah). Both energetic and exhausting! Her domain is so encompassing! Each night ended with a sex magick (because how could it not) but the energy and the exchange of energy was intense. The last night might have been the most spiritual/revealing, here are my notes.
I found myself going through the portal of the sigil and was in a somewhat desolate world. All around me flew ideas manifested. Towers hovered in the sky and other objects. The air around me was a blue-purple and I saw Lilith in her winged form. I saw another form, a power fly towards her at light speed and when they touched a massive pulse of energy flew out from them, causing the objects which were floating near by to take life. I floated in the air a bit, caught up by the energy. Then I approached Her and she clasped onto me, she put her sex on mine and kissed me deep. We exchanged some blood through our mouths (like vampires). Through our passionate kissing and exchanges, smaller pulses like the one I saw before flowed out. She carved her draconian sigil in my chest and also marked my third eye. After the invocation I laid on the floor and opened my mind to her messages. The one message that I got as I tranced out looking at the ceiling light, was that fornication comes in many forms. That all interactions can be seen as a fornication or a part of it, like foreplay.
I can see why so many people work with Her. Next week is all about Hecate, we shall see how that goes.
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Time has certainly passed quickly. Life has been stuck in a transition which seems to be an oxymoron yet perfectly explains my current existence. While I grow spiritually, making new contacts with several entities and working with energies that once were forbidden, I am also living in a routine that makes me feel almost hallow.
I recently performed a ritual to bring passion and desire into my life. I need that fire which burns the soul and keeps life interesting. I have rarely felt the heat of those flames, always so short and quickly forgotten. The ritual went well, as I performed the full call and invocation to an aspect of Lilith, I consecrated an unholy grail and consumed it and then opened the gates within. The purpose is to make myself more attractive, I can feel the magnetic field around me, my confidence has grown. The bargain, I guess I will call it that, is that I can only masturbate on the new and full moon, as they are both aspects of Lilith’s peak powers. I can also still perform any sex magick as required by rituals as those are sacred uses of my sexual energy. I will keep to this bargain as long as She keeps to her part, if I don’t see real results in the next month or two then I will consider the bargain void.
I continue my work with the Temple of Ascending Flame and recently started with the Temple of the Silver Star to prepare for entry into the A:.A:. if I want to explore Thelema further.
