I wonder if I’ll ever get over feeling responsible for me. That same day when my blood innocence shed my last drop. When I felt that last crack of life, when I felt that first scream of life, how everything changes! My mind numb at the the enormity of it all. My angry screams disolved in the cruel face filled with despair. I did not understand it myself. I knew right down to the pit of my stomach it was a sacrifice I should never have allowed myself to make. I stare at me before me now. I hear my scream to my inhuman sounding name, which housed an unspoken curse, thrown at my feet, I was left only to guess what. My voice right to the very last gurgling syllable said it all. My fear of loosing myself was my decision to make. My choice was set just as it was from the very beginning. “You brought me here! You take me away!” It seemed as if in that moment I had spent all my life preparing for that very moment, like a tree I was felled to the ground with an almost soothing thud, I began to live. I found the place where I belonged. That day had come. “It happens with everything I love. They leave me!”