I don’t want to go into a long rambling post, but basically I have been considering my own issues with the idea of self interest. I, like surely many here I would imagine, was taught so firmly by society and my own family to never be selfish, to put others ahead of me always, that basically love means self sacrifice. Now I’m not saying I don’t think I or anyone else should help someone out, do a favor, or be a good friend. Of course we should and I do consider myself a good person. I just want to really work on not being a large number of people’s personal doormat. Lately I am seeing this trait as weakness, as a block to my own ascension, that without the ability to overcome I will never move higher.
What I feel I need to do is to get more into the energy of self interest, or pure indiscriminate selfishness, or “want it 'cause I want it” of no such thing as too much because potential is unlimited anyway. The feeling of “do what it takes, and not feel bad for doing it” I’m sure there is an energy or spirit for just that kind of thing, likely a bunch of them, but I’m not sure what to work with, where to find it.
Do not accept the conclusions of others without examining their methods and reasons and testing out the results for yourself.
I think you’re on the right track. You describe a common pattern that most people in civilization have to deal with. We’re taught to blend in and be part of society. This lets us survive and even thrive, up to a point. But at some point you already know whats good and bad, what benefits you, what benefits others, etc. You don’t need anyone giving you rules anymore. It has come time to make your own.
I think I know what you are feeling. For me initially I expanded the concept of ‘help others’ to include myself. For example… What I would do for anyone else to help them, I would also do for myself.
I realized that I can’t teach or help anyone beyond my own knowledge and experience.
What I did was form the need and intent with strong emotion and called upon a high power and was sent a specific spirit whose domain was the exalting of the individual by burning away limitations. I connected with that spirit a few times when I felt distracted and unable to make progress on what was important to me.
Now I am much more comfortable dropping things out of my life when I see they are not aligned with my vision, so I do not feel that need as much now.
So it’s an option to call up an unknown spirit given a need, you can make contact with one who will be aligned with and specialized in whatever purpose you need. Or you can page through the grimoires and find one. Whatever you find works for you.
Ruthlessness is a beautiful trait to cultivate. There is a master/slave, predator/prey dynamic at work in the vast majority of human interaction. In my heart of hearts I have a love for other people but its been overwhelmed by the fact that people will not help you on the basis of having a good heart.
In this world he who deals arms and drugs and stays fed and housed will be treated better than the moralist who refuses to do such things but becomes destitute.
The strong eat the weak, so chose strength!
Belial was a big influence in realizing that for me as well since you asked for a spirit that is knowledgable in these things. The word “Ruthless” came right from his mouth so to speak, and is really some sacred gnosis related to his lessons I feel.
Wake up in the morning with a live and let die attitude. Lie, cheat, steal, manipulate. Just get it done cause if you dont other humans will react with indiffrence or see it as a chance to exploit you sexually, financially, emotionally etc.