So I got a story for y'all

And you’re gonna love it.

So a year or two ago, I have just begun working at my last job as a grocery store bagger. My afternoon shift ended and instead of going home, I went to a munch I saw on Fetlife. So it went pretty usual. Me just fuck’n around looking for someone to talk to. I constantly go outside to listen to some music and breathe, just to go back inside and continue trying. The group leader, a cute chubby latina (I kinda liked her) came up to me and was the first to show me some attention all day. I really appreciated it. She added me to this yahoo group for the munch. I didn’t do too much with it cause idk how to be a part of large group conversations.

Eventually she messaged me directly and we began talking on video chat. I’d describe her as…energetic. You know, kinda random and all over the place but nothing to worry about. She even said she wanted to have sex with me. Truth be told, I didn’t know if she was serious. Girls, from my experience, tend to joke about that. It’s really annoying and honestly insulting. But, I can’t call them out on it.

I began telling her about my occult practices and she was interested. I picked her up at a friend’s house once and took her into a nearby shopping town with several stores focused on occultism/spirituality (mostly Wiccan). PS, I don’t go there too much anymore. In one store, the owner (a wiccan highpriestess) is kinda racist, and the other store owner comes off kinda judgmental. Anyway, we spent two hours in one store. She paid me 0 attention and mostly talked to the owner. When we left to go to the munch she runs, she ran back in. I left her with some books of my own.

Later on, she called me saying she left her home to go on a spiritual journey. She lives with her superstitious parents and young daughter. She asked me to pick her up.

I’d like to interrupt myself for a second. Earlier I posted about things I consider with lust magick and that one thing is too much of a concern to have sex. This means that I am so unconfident in myself, so lacking in self esteem, I bend to the will of any girl who shows me some attention. Despite any and all better judgment. I’ve gotten mixed up with some crazy girls before. I exit the relationship before any harm comes to me, but I do not feel as if any personal progress has been made. Society basically teaches us to define ourselves by our relationship status, that single means loser and taken means successful. This robs us of our personal power. Power, within the context of dating, considering how its just one big game, is based on approach. If you approach a possible partner, they hold the power. If they approach you, you hold the power. It’s ridiculous. I’ve gotten more power over myself since then, but back then I was willing to go along with whatever this wackadoo wanted me to do.

I didn’t get any sleep the night before, so I didn’t actually want to drive anywhere. I thought she needed my help, and thought I could possibly get laid. I didn’t, btw. I brought her home and started talking about this journey she wanted to go on. She said she wanted to go to new york. There’s tons of things to say about that. She was also concerned with some guy as well. Anyway, I asked her if she wanted to go for a walk. She did, but wanted to go into this woodsy area. It belongs to a family I don’t get along with, and they don’t like anyone on their property. She used that whole “No one owns the world” shit.

She told me she had a dream Lilith fucked her with a strapon. When we got back, she called that guy and spent two hours of my time talking to him. I wanted to tell her off for being a bad guest. But instead I gave into her weeping and tried playing shoulder to cry on. I then drove her home, emotionally and physically exhausted.

Few months go by and she video chats me. This is when the shit hits the fan. She tells me that she’s been enlightened. She doesn’t worship the goddess, she is the reincarnation of the mother fucking goddess. She is gaia. She is Morrigan. She is Lilith. And she decided to stop with bdsm cause sexuality is “EVIL.” She tells me that she has had a vision that in a past life, I was a man involved in the old story of Rama and Ravana in Hindu mythology. Then she tells me to stop practicing magick, stop working with demons, and go to banglodash cause a woman there is waiting to be my wife.

I look at her like the crazy bitch she is and tell her no! She tries commanding me, stating that she has always showed me love so I owe her. I mean the concern she showed when we met was nice, but since then she’s been a bad guest, bad friend, bad mother (cause she tried to leave her daughter), and over all crazy erratic bitch. She begs and pleads in what I can only describe as a descent into madness. And then, it happened before my eyes, she hit rock bottom. She looked at me with the crazy smile of a serial killer and began calling out my name. I blocked her and swore if she comes near me, I’m calling the cops.

Any thoughts?

2 Likes

She’s a young insecure girl who likes to jerk guys around. Get as far away from her as possible. Put a shield up around yourself.

Ps. You can approach someone for a date and still weild the power it’s just called confidence. Don’t fall for the bs society feeds you about relationships

3 Likes

Spiritual bypassing is one hell of a drug.

1 Like

She’s on plenty

1 Like

Just cut her off, she’s not your responsibility.

http://m.selfgrowth.com/?url=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.selfgrowth.com%2Farticles%2Frelationships-why-do-some-men-try-to-save-women&utm_referrer=#2810

4 Likes

This was awhile ago.

2 Likes

And joking around about having sex is just plane trashy. No man is entitled to a woman’s body, but you don’t string him on. It’s insulting.

2 Likes
  1. Single mom is still bonded to some other guy because that’s how sex usually works for women. But everyone pretends like that’s not true.

  2. People who meet strangers for sex and to play intense power-exchange games are often emotionally unstable, and given to extremes of behaviour.

  3. You want a partner because you’re a normal healthy young man who needs sex, and to love, and be loved.

  4. But you live in a world where the natural need for the love of another person is considered a weakness and “dating,” the quest for love that society always recognised in the past as the single most important choice in any young person’s life, is now considered a “game.”

You’re a decent healthy little fish trying to swim in an aquarium made out of pure liquid poison, you poor fucker. :woman_facepalming:

13 Likes

I will correct you. I do not focus on love. Love is a very powerful emotion that can be damaging, leeching, and manipulative. Yes, I want some bond, but not to the point of losing my sense of independence.

But yes, I’m looking for sex. It’s somewhat spiritual. I want to experience the natural state of romance and climax, to experience the feminine energy. I don’t want it all at once or immediately, but under a gradual procession of experiences.

I want to experience romance, but not lose myself in it.

2 Likes

I’m not going to argue the point because everything around you is gaslighting you about what will make you happy, just like it gaslit that girl, which is why she lives with her parents, has a child who will never grow up with his own father raising him and loving him, and lost her mind.

6 Likes

I also dated this other immature girl. Though instead of being crazy as shit she was dumb as dirt. I showed her Bdsm then she got herself an std.

After those experiences I’ve realized never bring a girl into these things. If she wants to, she’ll learn about these things on her own.

1 Like

4 Likes

I think there should be a different term. But, that’s not what I was doing.

2 Likes

You want sex look for sex. You want to be love, be about that. What the fuck do you modern males expect from us females?

If she wasn’t going give it up move on.

You all want all the benefits of a relationship, but not be in one. The less of a fuck you give the better off you are.

3 Likes

Well the basic definition of dogma is a belief that is vehemently adhered to and promoted in the absence of factual support, and where any facts that contradict it are ignored or denied.

Society has this dogma right now that says access to strange is the most important, moral, high-minded, and noble thing.

And that it’s worthy of any amount of personal sacrifice and self-examination to make sure one’s beliefs and needs in no way impinge upon the quest for someone new and unknown to fuck, which is always healthy and righteous and rational.

Anything that in any way limits access to constant and consequence-free sex with strangers is considered sick, warped, crazy, and an evil morally equivalent to genocide.

And all the very-visible casualties of the quest for strange (ref: the endless stream of despairing “get my ex back” posters here), the diseases and the loneliness, and all the kids raised in single-parent (or no-parent) families, or aborted at any stage up to birth, are a dirty and shameful little mess who have failed to adopt this glorious dogma of worshipping at the altar of mindless and meaningless sex with someone you intend to reject, in turn, when the next piece of ass walks by.

Amen.

6 Likes

Damn.
I kind of agree to your points as a male to be honest.Many of us dissappears when things get serious.

2 Likes

I agree with that in general. Not in relation to what @davethebarbarian said.

1 Like

Btw I have to be inclusive and say the madness is not the sole property of straight people in the endless holy quest for strange:

I have a lot of sex. Topping, bottoming, oral, rimming. I love it all. Living in New York City as a gay man, sex has never been easier to find. I can find it on apps, at the gym, at bars and clubs, on the subway. Anywhere.

…“But gay men don’t even know they’re at risk! We didn’t learn about parasites in sex ed class. No doctor has ever warned me about it. I’ve never seen the departments of health or the CDC put out any educational materials on the subject.” I ranted, breathlessly.

3 Likes

I am emotionally closed off to anyone until they can prove they are worth the risk. Anyone can use that sound advice.

1 Like

You can even see them in succubus threads.
Or gay incubus threads

2 Likes