Serious, though I'd understand skepticism

Black Magick & The Left Hand Path
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For 20 years - going back to high school - i’ve traded my truth in exchange for societal acceptance. I now realize that this has been contemptible. My strongest emotion is self-loathing.

I need to do penance. But my instincts for self-preservation are too strong.

I don’t want to seem ignorant (I am, but since I know it, not as much as some) - but I’ve been increasingly interested in exposing myself to a powerful practitioner who - for whatever reason - would benefit from my willingness to suffer.

Obviously I would be vulnerable to deceptive intent … other than that, may i ask if this is a viable option? I am seriously starting to feel too nihilistic, too desperate to not trying something.

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Welcome @OblivionJunkie666 It is a rule of this forum for all new members to properly introduce themselves, so PLEASE CLICK ON THE IMAGE BELOW and tell us about yourself and any experience you may have in magick, such as what you practice, how long you have practiced, areas of interest, etc:

intro3

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Great, let us drag an intro out of you, one that tells us why you got into magick, and what you have succeeded or failet at, etc - or we’ll ban you - does that scratch the itch?

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