I’ve been checking on the forum but haven’t found answers, only posts about detachment from result etc. If there’re answers that I haven’t found, sorry and please feel free to send this there.
So I’ve been doing some rituals on this person (Dantalion and Seere and a couple of spells), they worked amazingly well but for short time: He always goes back to how he was thinking before or decides otherwise. Him changing his mind every week is not new, and I was planning to go full layered with more spirits and throw a bit of revenge on it (Asmoday and Raum).
BUT, I’ve realised I’m basically focusing on him not getting X or feeling Y or saying Z, when is basically my ego and hurt talking. Instead I should be focusing on improving myself, meeting people that I really like and have things in common with… I have the feeling the possibilities where I’m living are endless and I’m just losing my time, when the best I could do is to move on. Not that I was focused on getting back together (I know is not a good idea) but I still wanted to influence him and his life and my time and energy are going there.
Is there any way/ritual/demon that I could use to really detach from this situation? I’m not in love but I do care and get pissed by what goes on with his life/who he’s gonna want to marry etc. as we have daily contact that I can’t avoid, and how he had behaved with me in many occasions asked for pay back.
To be clear: I don’t want to banish him out of my life as we work together and would be nice if we could stay in a friendly relationship. But I would love to not give a f about anything, feel happy for whatever goes right with him and be about my own life and happiness. I’ll do my part in the real world but I’ve always have attachment issues, so a bit of Magickal help would be great. Thanks guys!!!
Have you tried looking into cord cutting/cut in clear type rituals? Otherwise there’s rituals/spirits for making a relationship reach it peak- either growing stronger, or dissipating depending on what the outcome would be naturally, only designed to rush the pace. There’s also spirits for ending a relationship of any nature peacefully.
The Angels of Love by Zanna Blaise has one for the type where you cause the relationship to peak, and the 84 Genies of Powers by Tristan Whitespire, have genius for this, as well as for ending relationships of any nature peacefully and I know I’ve seen other spirits for it as well, these are just the two resources I’ve personally used.
Focusing on yourself- self love… we usually are neglecting ourselves to be incredibly super focused on someone else and putting expectations on them to do something we should be providing to ourselves
Heal and forget type meditations have also helped me hugely in letting go in the past
Work on letting go… a long time before magick, I had a really severe heartbreak and couldn’t think about anything else… I had no idea how to get through it but I read somewhere (likely in a religious book) to ‘pray’ for the things you were struggling to let go with to happen to the person… being desperate enough I would have done anything to stop thinking about him, so I started praying for him… not to have anything bad, just that he would get good things repetitively, things I was most scared of him doing (new partner etc) and it was scary at first… but when I was done… I had let go! I didn’t care if he did or didn’t get any of the things I prayed for him to get by the end… I stopped giving any fucks
I didn’t check cord cutting. I tried it once 2 years ago, but I had just came out of an abusive relationship and I guess I was so trauma bonded that, even if I wanted for him to stay away, deep inside I wished for our toxic bond not to end. So I wouldn’t say it worked, took me many months and more than 7.000 kilometers to detach, but I cannot judge the effectiveness of the ritual or my capacity to do it based on that moment. I’m very much myself this time, so will look into it to do it properly! Is about energy Magick, isn’t it? I read your comments about it and I got interested on it, so thanks for the inspiration
Some weeks ago I was in bed, the situation was escalating and I explode. Quietly but quite literally. I burst in energy, felt like I was a bomb and the energy expanding in waves. I was screaming in my head, and with my screams the waves of hurt and rage were expanding and destroying. I didn’t plan it, it just happened and I went with it. I felt “better” after, like after punching a pillow for a long time. Some days after the person that provoked my rage (the same one I want to detach from) told me that he has been having horrible days for the last few days. Drained of energy, falling asleep in places like a taxi, having nightmares and aches on his body. I spent time with him, he couldn’t sit straight or sleep (he’s young and athletic) due to the pain on his chest. He told me he was under spiritual attack. He then started to pray heavily and it went away. This has been one of the most obvious results that I have had and it didn’t involve spirits, rituals or candles. So I read anything you have to say about energy work with a lot of interest.
Btw, to cause the relationship to peak could be very risky for me. We work together and our relationship ending could mean any kind of relationship, I guess, and right now I cannot afford to leave my job or to be invited to leave. We are in a tricky place and I don’t want to risk pushing our situation on that direction, but I’ll check the book you mentioned anyway. Thank you very much!!
Oh waw, didn’t think about it… in fact, I did quite the opposite and wished for him to lose what he’s working towards right now. I feel like a horrible person writing that but is the truth. In my case is not really a heartache but he has manipulated me and gambled with what I have. It feels awful when the person to do that is not a bad person, so it was basically him not even considering his actions may impact my life. His hypocrisy is something that killed me, I have a problem with the misogynistic way of doing the things that people like him have. So I guess I was hurt and angry at that and wanted for him to learn a lesson, but I don’t really have the wish for him to have a bad life, on the contrary.
I’m happy that you were able to let go after that heartbreak and looks like a very clever way to go about it. Thinking about it, if your wish is for him to lose everything, let’s say, you’ll be obsessed checking and trying to see if you got your wish. So 0 detachment. If you pray for his good and let go, any good thing that happens to him will not be a reason for you to be depressed: You prayed for it. So it sounds really interesting and… peaceful?
I have to confess that I move between a wish to let go and wish him the best, and one of showing him that he cannot treat people this way. But as you say, we neglect ourselves to be super focused on someone else. Even if I got all I “wanted” and give him a bad time, would it be worth it? Should I spend my time trying to bring bad things to him instead of trying to bring good things for me? I don’t think so.
So I’ll look into cord cutting, meditations, etc. Self love is something I have always always struggled with, so is about time to work on that too. Thanks a lot for your insights!!
I’ve definitely chosen to teach a few people a lesson since
But now I mostly work by… does someone deserve my energy? If they do, they get it. If they provide me with enough to be worth my time. If they don’t… I personally prefer to stop giving mine away to them. If they become such a hinderance to me and unhelpful… it’s over for them. I’m focusing on me…
It’s called the get out of my life spell. that’s how you detach. =o)
If you want him around. than it’s still attachment. detachment is you don’t care either way if he’s around or not.
Very easy to do. Look in the mirror and talk to yourself. eventually it becomes habit and become easy to take care of you. If you see yourself often it’s easy to take care self better as it give illusion that your taking care of someone. Also talk in 3rd person using your own name. lol.
I guess that way of thinking would weed out curses for petty things, and we would only put energy on good things (because at the end, who really deserve our energy are the people that do good to us, and mainly ourselves) or for curses on really, really bad situations, more like a defense than a revenge…
I’m not sure if I’m there yet. I’m aware I have to get rid of my ego and I think I’m better than before, but there’s still a big way to go for me. Revenge is mostly about ego I think. In this case, sometimes I get to the point of wanting to let it go, but the majority of the time I’m on the “he deserves a lesson”.
