Question raised from "BALG"

Hey, I’ve got a pretty straight forward question brought up upon reading the text - Become a Living God. (Nice to see that E.A. created a web forum for people, I was thinking about asking this question today but this seems like a better place then over email)

How do you tell if you’ve “…become a victim of your own love spell.”

What do you mean by victim?

the back-firing of a “spell” to procure and prolong relationship with someone leading me to feel the need to be in this relationship not out of my own freewill but out of a confusion of emotions

It sounds like you already know that you’ve fallen victim to spell backlash. However, the best way I’ve found to know if things are influencing me against my will is to meditate on myself. After a few deep breaths and centering I can generally get a feel for my own spiritual presence. From there I can generally discover if there are other things acting upon me. I hope this helps.

I would say that you become a victim of your own spell when your attachment to the enchanted person is reaching a pike, and the chains over his/her perception is dropping.

So, you probably have fallen in love with that person, the power of the spell vanishing, and this person no longer wants to be with you. And that’s going to hurt you, in every way.

You can do some other spells, and perhaps they work, but at the end you’re entering into an spiral where the only victim are you. Not being yet the one who is in charge, but a slave of your own wishes and of the situation you have created.

So, originally you wanted to be the Master of the Universe, and finally you have become enslaved by your own chains.

As you describe it Izual that sounds more like whatever enchantment was tried simply didnt work out and your left in the original position of you obsessing about the one who doesnt want you while they are unmoved.

I’m not sure I get the basic point about spell backfiring as such. Eric himself said he thinks the whole so called Wiccan threefold rule is hogwash and that magickal operations either work or fail and thats it. I cant say im experienced enough to comment from my own practical work but rebound must only work as a kind of specific karmic law and im not convinced it does.

I did a love spell on someone who I felt was slipping away from me once, to keep them with me against their will. It worked, but required a lot of maintenance and was pretty draining. I don’t subscribe to the whole ‘spell backlash’ stuff, I know that it didn’t turn out well because I did it to willfully manipulate someone else’s mind against their own true desire out of my own unhealthy obsession with them. It was painful to let go, but once I did and got through the hurt, I then did a spell to draw a lover to me (as opposed to forcing one who didn’t want me to be with me anyway) and when those results manifested they required no energetically draining upkeep, it was just done and we were happy.

Hey Neophyte,

Well, I’m not talking about a karmic reversal-law at all!

I am simply describing a situation that indeed you’ll face if you manipulate one person to love you.

Love apparently cannot be forced, but only is given freely, and although you may ensnare the emotions and thoughts of a specific person, it simply won’t last forever.

It is in that point when you become a victim, because the perception of this person sonner of latter will be unveiled, and if you have reached the point of giving your emotions and love to this person, it will simply explode into your face.

That’s not some “karmic law”, it’s a natural result because that person regains the control over his/her perceptions.

I think this kind of spells could work very good is your intention is a rapid and extremely passionate kind of relationship, normally to satisfy your sexual desire, but not for genuine love.

As has said RidgeRunner, if you are looking for true love, it is my opinion that the best you can do it’s not to force anyone to love you, but to ask the universe, that is to yourself, to deliver to you a person for you to love.

I see some good feedback to the actual question “How do you tell…”. I’m going to bypass the particulars and simply offer what would be MY litmus test: “Is this relationship making me feel the way I want to feel in a relationship?” And whatever the answer is, the next question is: “How important is it to Me that I feel __________(pick your words - valued, appreciated, desired, etc.)?” TRUTH: If this relationship has gone sour, its kinda like milk - putting it back in the fridge won’t make it become good again. In this instance, I’d say attend to the problem at hand first; you can always study the roots (to avoid future mistakes) later, when you are not distraught over the problem.

Hi Izual, my point about spell backfiring was to Jaron’s original question rather than to your earlier comment and I do feel that spells either work or dont.

But I think I am pretty much agreeing with your overall position in that love is too complex and multifaceted to be forced wheras if the point of a spell is to sexually attract somone in the moment then that can be done. You know it worked because you bedded them or it didnt as you failed too!

I think you could say that kind of working is a manipulation as sex is a powerful magick in itself and thats a major boost to any attempt to obtain someone you desire, but if fundamentally they dont want that with you then nothing else will come of it.

You can see this on another level with use of certain NLP techniques and implanted suggestions in conversational techniques, but though you may get somone to sleep with you or test drive your car if at the end of the day they dont want the product they aint gonna sign up!

Backlash Karma etc - well - I see it more like a side effect that is negative that was unexpected that appears to the person as something that is labelled with the first association that seems to fit their sense of being punished for doing something they felt was wrong… when it was only really ever not the most beneficial act to perform… its a process to me of distilling what it is that you truly desire - and there in lies the pitfall…

You must enter your own psyche in pure honesty and then question - what is it I really want…
The answer does not have to be immediate and often it isnt because of the pain or whatever surrounds and protects you from reliving it - but to ask the question all of the illusion and mental justification must be undone…

It doesnt matter how powerful you think you are - or what you have done with magick - the actual realm of relationships and pain are incredibly addiction inspiring in various ways and cause alot of shielding from your own judgement and self condemnation - and a sense of self forgiveness is pivotal, to accept that it was a mistake here or there or whatever the dynamic was, but to then go on and heal it…

Often the pain we experience is from rejection and even punishment… or from mistreating another accidentally or even on purpose - but its important to take the wisdom from it - otherwise the sacrifice and ‘bloodshed’ our own ‘bloodshed’ was in vain… so its important to find that safe place within… and work from there… and that will begin to dissolve the bondage, the feeling of true liberation

Although love spells isn’t under my list of expertise, I feel that your account is the most likeliest thing to happen in such a situation.

Is it so wrong to want what you want? It’s magic of course!!!How can we all aspire to become living Gods if we can’t alter our reality with our powers. Nothing in life is guaranteed but this whole forum/info is to provide those wishing to use their powers for whatever it maybe. Left/right, black/white, or good/evil. You are the master of your destiny!! We all use our powers differently. Except me, I can’t seem to get mine to manifest, but I keep striving. Let’s not drag the moral police into this forum but keep it in it’s purest and rawest state as E.A. envisioned.

@CMALIK- I liked the raw honesty in your opnion. And I like the fact that you are free to express opinions different from others WITHOUT being ostracized & rejected. We respect each other here and all I see are thoughts. I do not perceive judgement, criticism or belittling from any post here. And that’s part of what this forum is all about, too, yes? :wink: Z

There’s definitely nothing wrong with wanting what you want and using your power to get it. However when someone (myself for example) has done the very thing someone else asks about in the past and had less-than-desirable results, there’s also nothing wrong with sharing your experience so that others considering the same thing will have the benefit of your experience when they go into their own working, whether they choose to use it or not - that’s always up to the practicioner.

Love spells will not work. Perception will return; centered. My sense is that entities will place an energetic veil over you that will skew the perception of others for as long as you are attached to the entity. They are not interested in keeping anyone monogamous, so if that’s what you want, you’re going to have a tough time.

I think becoming the “victim” of one’s own love spell has to do with obsessing about the target and/or attachment to the outcome. I’ve cast a few in my day and I noticed that if I’m really caught up in the hows and whens of it all, I become the victim. I experienced the emotions I wanted the person to have and felt desperate the get them. Once I no longer cared (which, in essence, means I moved on to someone/something else), results manifested in an ideal way. I didn’t want it anymore but yup, there it was!

I also think no two love spells/workings are the same. If you’re casting/evoking for the love of someone with whom you don’t have some messed up past, I think they work wonderfully provided you put in the effort to be around the person and at least talk to them. If you’re working to win someone back, that’s where it gets tricky and can be draining. You have to deal with whatever issues drove a wedge between the two of you AND work on re-establishing the love, trust, etc. The former is usually what mucks it all up. Like someone else said, it’s like putting spoiled milk back in the fridge. You’re not going to make the milk safe for consumption again but you can slow down the spoilage. Nine times out of ten, you’ll end up losing interest in the whole debacle because there are few people who are worth that kind of constant effort. I could be projecting here but oftentimes you get that hollow victory feeling. You moved heaven and earth to get the person and then you realize, “Hmph, they really ain’t that great.”

I don’t fully agree that any love spell done would require constant maintenance or wears off when you’re no longer connected to that entity. Again, it’s a situational thing. If you’re forcing someone to do something against their nature, like forcing someone who isn’t gay to be in a sexual relationship with someone of the same sex, that will require constant work because true nature will out. Same with a cheater. A cheater loving you isn’t enough to make them keep their pants on for you. I used to practice hoodoo and there were many a times that I had to tell people that trying to get that cheating ex back would likely be more trouble than it’s worth. Get 'em back and dump them but don’t expect to get them back and have an awesome, monogamous relationship.

I think that’s why love spells get a bad rap. They are effective and do work but love is complex as are human emotions and a lot of times they require a lot of work to “stick”. Most people won’t question their feelings on something like giving you a job you’re woefully under qualified for but most people will wonder “Why the hell do I think I love Bobo from across the street? Dude is vile and I never liked him.” and will fight that if it’s just too weird a concept for them to accept.