I think I understand the question you’re asking.
From what I gather consciousness runs like light. Both quantum chaos and newtonian cause and effect play a part depending on different factors.
At one end of the spectrum you have the wave function where you are merged with your state and operate more like a machine. Cause -> Effect. This is where results happen.
As you step back from the experience there is the sense of being more than the contents, feelings, and thoughts in one’s mind and living experience. This is where the space is between stimulus and response.
The more head room one has the more perspective one has. This makes the difference between getting in a fight over a sports team (of all stupid things) and having enough forsight to walk away from a drunk idiot who wants to roll around on the dirty floor at the bar.
Far enough back and you have “particle state” (as an allegory) where you can observe the factors at play. The thoughts, emotions, contents, patterns, etc.
“This is where the magick happens!” - Every MTV Cribs episode ever
At the extreme other end of this cycle/spectrum there is no self. You go here every night when you sleep and slip to the void, zero state.
At the deeper levels everything is the same energy, the same fundamental force that constructs everything else. From this level everything can be manipulated to create the observer experience.
It sounds like a paradox because you’re using two different sets of rules to measure what boils down to Hermetics. You can’t use classical physics on it’s own to study light. Same with consciousness. Otherwise we’d just be extremely complex biochemical robots. Put X in, get Y out.
Due to this osscilation of states (which move all over the place in an instant) we have the space for will as well as the capacity to be influenced ourselves.
Will exists, sometimes. Depends on the state of consciousness. Full immersion and you’re nearly a robot. Pulled back from immersion and you have perspective and choice.
And then in some states consciousness doesn’t exist at all. All is mind.
Dig into the Kyballion and get a brief grasp the Hermetic Principles. Use it as an anchor to run other philosophies through. It will begin to make more and more sense from other points of view.
The book is basically a practical blueprint for the universe and the self if you can trip out hard enough to grasp it. I’ve got other allegories if this doesn’t make sense