I am a human male, 31 years old. I have come to this forum as an observer and discovered some folks here have some nice ideas. Of magick and the ties that bind the material world to the immaterial i know some. Broadly i have looked into subjects such as the summoning of spirits, creation of tulpas, and binding of demons/“eldritch” beings; i have looked into various paranormal explanations of unidentified beings and objects including several religious tangents pertaining to those; being that i myself have experienced both spooky coincidence and déjà rêvé i have looked into these topics on the internet but found very little physical readings; and i have very broadly glided over the concepts of ritual magick, chaos magick, and wiccan magic opting for a more holistic approach than some of that stuff. Probably have more stuck in the brain pan but that will do for now i think.
I am here essentially to see what shakes out and meet some witchy folk. I would like for my vague and probably shakey grip on the forces of the unseen to be shored up and bolstered. Maybe also so i can get some good reading material or ideas for when my son comes of age and starts asking questions i can only answer in what probably sounds like drunken rants about how society, religion, and science are all great but also stink and don’t begin or end with a whole picture of understanding our universe.
Currently i have a belief system that imparts my will and intention into everyday activities, a system i strongly believe works for me for two reasons. One is that even with regular exercise and meditation my focus is poor, and not maintaining focus during a complicated ritual could certainly lead to disastrous results. The only way i have found to truly demain focused is artifical i.e. prescription and/or non-prescription drugs and so, because of my own beliefs to their ill effect, i have not done this with any sort of intention or willpower in a very long time. The second reason being that i find the act of imparting will into the world to work like a muscle, gotta use it or you lose it.
However i no longer try to truly examine the results quantitatively. I do use my own sigils regularly for what i refer to as the basics but do not incorporate anyone else’s creations any more.
Another major reason i only work with basics such as succesful repairs, help with cleaning, good luck, etc. is that the last large and pragmatic spell i cast was successful but wrongheaded and worked against my own life. This was years ago and has shaped my current narrative.
I have however, in my much younger days, put will and intention into some rituals, a few sigil based and simplistic in design, others stemming more from whimsy and loosely studied but attempted anyways. A few ad hoc attempts at other things, like mind control ended poorly and left me frightened, speaking with non-corporeal entities wasn’t fruitful but not necessarily a failure. They were not adequately prepared for and certainly an ambivalent mind will not yield much if any positive results. I have performed several smudging rituals as well. Been party to many friends needing a third for some such thing or other, I’ll always be a good sport.