I figured I would have a try at a journal here, how successful I will be at it only time will tell. If you happen across this and have some input or insight, or just want to say hi, feel free. Regardless, I wish you the best on your path. The ramblings and musings here are just me trying to make sense of my world, and my place in it. I’m not going to tell you that it’s important, or that there is any significant gem or lesson in any of it, it is simply as my title states. If you choose to read further, welcome, if not safe paths.
Where should I even start? The most rational place to start is at the beginning, but that isn’t what is on my mind now, and truth be told my beginning is so far removed from where I currently stand that is almost argue that it is completely irrelevant.
With that being said, let’s start with what currently feels my thoughts, this feeling in my chest. I feel like there is a rope tied around my heart trying to pull me somewhere, but I have no direction or even inkling of where it may be trying to guide me . I always feel it to some degree, but today it is absolutely driving me insane. The closest thing that I can even begin to compare it to is tying a rope to a tree then going deep into a cave, through it’s twists and turns, so you can follow the rope back out of the darkness without getting lost.
The problem is, I don’t have any idea what the rope is even tied to, or what could begin to release the pressure it’s putting on me. It isn’t necessarily a bad pull, I feel like I should follow it back to wherever it leads, but I can’t get any sense of direction from it. All I can tell at this moment is wherever I am is not where I am supposed to be, and whatever is on the other end is trying to remedy that. I have tried many times before to figure out what is pulling me, but to no avail.
My first thought is that it is a particular Goddess trying to bring me back into her fold, but that easily could just be me trying to find answers where there are none. At this point, I honestly have no idea, maybe it’s nothing at all. I guess only time will actually tell, that and me trying random things until I finally lock onto something that gives me some slack in the rope.