I FINALLY started reading Evoking Eternity by EA Koetting. It’s been sitting on my desk for 3 months and I’ve just now made myself start it. I used to be able to knock out books this size in a day, I want to get back to that.
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I’ll update this again after tonight’s ritual, but I am currently about to crawl out of my skin I have so much energy coursing through me. Also, after this ritual I will begin pathworking the gatekeepers. I want to know everything they have to teach.
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I’m still trying to process some of what happened. I’ve never participated in such a strong ritual before. When it was all said and done, I was drenched in sweat and could barely keep my eyes open from exhaustion, I did good to pop in the shower and crawl in to bed. I had visions of a cloud-like darkness enveloping the earth, covering nations within seconds, and then seeping in to the soil. I’ll see how I feel in the morning once I sleep the rest of this off.
Tonight I’ll be experimenting with some mushrooms and meditation. I’ll try to document what I can after.
While I did have a very peaceful meditation session today, I got nothing from my experiment. FML.
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I feel like I’ve hit a block in my path, hopefully some deep meditation will help clear it.
I’ve got all of my goals laid out before me, now to make them manifest.
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So I am going to be on my 3rd day of EA’s 7 Day Ritual challenge and so far I am noticing:
•I have a rage building in me that’s going to burst here very soon, I can feel it.
•I’m more confident.
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I don’t know how you feel about reiki, but here is my own playlist I use. It helps me after doing the E.A. video.
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I’ve got an urge to start looking at new tarot decks, hopefully I can find something that I’m drawn to.
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After a lot of thought, I genuinely feel like I need an overall life detox. I’m going to dedicate the rest of the month to detox any toxins, negative thoughts or energy, out of my life. I know this is cliche, but next year WILL be my year, and I’m not dragging any of this old shit with me.
Thoth tarot is best tarot
I did a Tarot deck to stroke my massive ego. It is alright, but pretty minimalist (although still like 1000x better than the tarot de tarot de marseille.) I meant to finish coding up something to put them in, but I didn’t, I just have this text based c program I wrote and use.
I need to update this more often. 
I keep trying to meditate and chant Belial’s enn but my ears keep ringing so bad I can’t focus.
I finally had a good meditating session but now I feel exhausted.
I feel like tonight’s meditation was more successful than any that I’ve done this week. I finally made contact with Belial.
I was finally able to ground myself, which I haven’t been able to do in a while. Once I was grounded, I began chanting his enn and visualizing his sigil opening.
I felt a presence in the room, the temperature felt like it had dropped but I was burning up. I couldn’t move, aside from moving my arms above my head, much like I was being pinned down. The air became thick and for a moment it was almost impossible to get a good breath in.
I asked the questions that I intended to ask, and just like that, his presence was gone. No answer. I could breath again. I could move, so believe me I stretched as much as I could.
So I believe I’ve finally made it past the block that I was experiencing.
But while I was meditating tonight, I kept visualizing myself, laying in bed, my chest flayed open and my ribs cracked wide.
I wasn’t in pain. In fact, I couldn’t feel a thing. During the visualization, I felt this overwhelming calm.
I wonder what this could mean…
I’m in love with my new tarot deck!
However, pulling the 5 of pentacles as the first draw seems like I’m going to have a love/hate relationship with this one.
