I have a couple questions, so I will split this into a few topics. Once again, thank you all for any advice forthcoming:
Final one for now, I promise. As I stated before, for some reason I seem drawn to Lilith. As such I’ve been asking her with help with being able to control my third eye and if I could meet with her or one of her daughters in dream to speak with them. I have been asking before I sleep, have been respectful, and have thanked her allowing my requests. Last night, as usual I asked this. The following occurred and I am not to sure of the time tables, but this is the account. I closed my eyes and saw a bright flash of light blue. Immediately I had a strong urge to look down and when i did I saw a deep dark violet followed by darkness that seemed blacker then black. I then felt my body thrust into the darkness, like i was falling into a hole. A loud hum began and intensified until it was all encompassing I could feel my body vibrating and a static electricity like feel around it. The static had a weirdly pleasurable feeling to it. The temperature felt freezing all of a sudden and I felt there was something or someone watching me. Fear shot through my mind and like a bitch I retreated from it. At the same time, I became aware of myself retreating and became angry at myself for doing so. I tried to refocus on the feeling and return, but the harder I tried the more distant it became until I was just me lying in bed with the sounds of night returned. My question, is there some way to abate the fear so i don’t involuntary flee? Was this Lilith responding? I opened my eyes the minute it was over and wrote down what happened and the time, 05:42. I thanked her regardless afterwards and told her I would try again if she would allow it, but I spent the next 3 hrs only tossing and turning.
Why are you making multiple threads for what amounts to basically the same topic? Is there a particular reason why you can’t ask all your questions in the same place?
I separated them due to being different questions and because I didn’t think I would be able to get as much help if i wrote it as a 2 page question lol. I will make them into a single post in the future and try to be more concise.
Blue/violet like Ajna Chakra (the third eye), and violet bordering on black: Lilith is the “Black Moon”, and such colors are suggested by a magician for illuminating the temple when summoning demons… Good.
With fear you need either to react fast or for it to last enough so that you can “ride” that emotion and use this excitement to fuel your magical experiences and workings. Try to recreate fear itself; in fact, some authors suggest an inner discipline where you do so for love etc.
Thanks for the response. So, by act fast, do you mean to tell myself to accept it in the moment? Should I focus into it or is that detrimental?
I saw also the thread about the problem with thoughts: the approach is similar in such a way that by looking at the mental chaos there is peace. Anyway yes, acting fast about the attitude which you may do in 2 ways: either put fear aside or even try to intensify this emotion and maybe, just by that, you’re going to “own” it.
I’ll keep this in mind. I might not be able to abate the fear, but I think my next chance I’ll try letting it move through me and merge with it. Guess it will be a trial of fire, but I’m hoping I can push through it 