My name’s Rory, I’m 40 and live in Ireland.I got heavy into the occult about 9 years ago.I was fascinated by evocation and studied different teachings on it relentlessly. I’ve had a really strong urge to get back into practicing magic and lucid dreaming lately.
I had many strange experiences when last practicing evocation.My most jaw dropping result was with evoking Agrat Bat Mahalat.I evoked her 3 nights in a row.On the first 2 nights she made a candle flame tilt down to almost completely horizontal and held it there each time I requested she do it.I explained to her I wasn’t trying to be disrespectful by seemingly commanding her to move the candle flame, as I let her know that each time she moved it by my request it shattered more and more of my disbelief.By the third evocation I really believed she was there.Now I’d been practicing evocationj for about a year and had many strange experiences but never a physical manifestation,I never expected to experience one but by that third evocation I believed and I had the proper incense,cobolt blue,to allow her to manifest.
That night during the evocation,once I felt her presence,I asked her to send a psychic image of herself to my mind,which she promptly did.I saw an image of a young red haired girl.I described the image I saw to her. Then I opened my eyes WOAH!!!.There she was,completely solid looking before me,at the very edge of the circle standing up from a crossed legged position. She just stood there grinning down at me,an all knowing, slightly mocking,thin smile on her face.She looked as solid and real as any actual woman.I was in awe.My jaw dropped and I couldn’t speak which is exactly how E.A. described how one will always react to seeing their first physical manifestation except there was no fear, just awe and wonder.
Seeing her,it meant so much.Now I really want to make contact with her again to hopefully work with her or at least thank her for allowing me to see her and in so doing shattering most of my disbelief and doubt beginning in the first 2 evocations by dramatically moving the candle flame by request.She changed my whole view on reality.The urge to evoke her again has grown
very strong.
I’m really interested in evoking Agent Bat Mahalat again and asking her to teach me.
I’m also really interested in succubae in general.Having had success being visited by one in a lucid dream after performing ‘The Letter Writing Ritual.’
I’ve also lost a lot of confidence,especially sexually,over the last 4 years,even developing some psychological impotence,despite everything being physically fine. I really need help in overcoming this problem as I’ve actively avoided being with a woman for 4 years now,terrified of feeling that humiliation and shame again, of not being able to perform sexually .I don’t ever want to experience that again.Given her nature,I believe she could restore my confidence as she’s all about lust and sexual magnetism, which I desperately need and it’s said she’s known for working with beginners.
I’m also very interested in possesion,both partial and perfect possession,the goal being to help me have a sexual encounter with a pretty woman and for Agrat to be there with me through it all,banishing my doubt and fear,ao I can relax and have amazing sex,as she guides me through the whole encounter.That’s my main goal at the moment,to overcome this infuriating psychological impotence,as it’s getting worse the longer I remain sexually inactive.I can’t enjoy being with a woman at all now as I’m just worried about being able to perform at all. It’s horrible.My research definitely shows her to be the perfect spirit to help me.
So I have a great need at the moment but I"ve also just always been fascinated by magic and want to have more strange experiences.Any advice or descriptions of other people’s experiences with Agrat Bat Mahalat would be great thanks!

Welcome @Rory-James

Did you practice any specific system or tradition of evocation?

How long did you practice?

Hey man.I mostly kept it simple using E.A’s simplified evocation method although I experimented with some of Michael W. Ford’s Luciferian rituals of evocation as well but found I had less success as I couldn’t get into a trance state reading his long conjurations.However I found his conjurations really sparked the imagination so I sometimes read them at the start of a ritual to get in that magic mood and then switch to E.A.'s method.
Also,I used theta binaural beats,listening to a half hour of them,twice a day,and before a ritual to still my mind.I found them great as I’ve always found meditation itself to be a chore.The theta binaural beats worked really well for me.
I must admit,it was the succubae that interested me the most,not because I just felt horny,they just fascinated me,especially the history of Lilith and Agrat Bat Mahalat.Now I find myself in a position where I could really use her help as she can restore my confidence and build up my poor self image as she represents the exact opposite of what I suffer from.I would really like to evoke her a few more times to get to know each other and then discuss possession with her,so. I can feel her confidence and lust radiating through me,healing me

I practiced intensely for 3 years,being completely absorbed in my studies and practice,it was intense.