Interested but concerned

Hello. I happened to come across this site seemingly by random, but looking through the forums, I feel intrigued. I have a few problems, however. I have a background of faith, so I worry about the conflictions of it. It also seems too good to be true. I’ve imagined fantasy worlds all my life, and to see something like this in front of me… it’s just hard to believe. I know I can probably get the answers to my questions from the videos of the main site, but I don’t want to touch them just yet (for the reasons above). However, I see this large community in the forums who all believe in this, so I have to ask: can you guide me in the right directions here? I’m sorry if this is not the right place to post this or if this is a waste of a post, but I thank anyone who answers it in kind.


De indoctrination is a great start. Purge your self of false fear, shame and guilt.


I also came from a background of Christianity, and I can tell you without a shred of doubt:

  1. I don’t regret broadening my belief paradigm

  2. When I began directly interacting with angels and demons I found out first hand that what I had been taught about them was erroneous. They are very different than I thought, and they are quite helpful

  3. I am growing at a much faster rate than I ever did with a limited paradigm such as the church

My two cents, take it or leave it


What kind of direction do you want? You might think you’re at a crossroads, but you should look carefully for the truth. The search function of the forum is also super useful for finding the firsthand accounts of others meeting with entities, from which you can draw your own conclusions. You can also find specific rituals that you can try yourself. I also highly recommend Koetting’s YouTube channel.


Thanks for the responses. I think I’ll do some more digging around on the forums like suggested. I think I would like to try a summoning, just to get a grasp of it. It would be interesting to manifest an angel.

Just use the search engine or ask any of us I’m always open for helping anyone with any problem.

And don’t forget to introduce yourself its a rule here in the forum.


If this continues to bother you, are there any mystics within your faith, or reports of miracles, that could provide a bridge and a possible route to begin studying without burning down everything you’ve held dear so far?

Some people would find such a burning liberating, others may not, only you can make that call.

In a similar vein, maybe you could look into focusing on healing and energy work to benefit others as a starting point, this can and does provide access to power and you can adapt the methods for different purposes when needed.

You may also find this book interesting regarding the “bigger picture” within which many magicians (not all) practice, it’s a kind of manual for metaphysics, will place you years ahead of where many of us started, and is also going to spare you endless and (I believe) futile angst about whether such-and-such a spirit or event is “real” or whether we simply harness our own power, etc. Oh, and best of all? It’s free, and pretty short and easy to read. :thumbsup:

Do as thou wilt. However, if you shake free from the shackles of a faith filled with rules, you will be much happier for it. Trust me. Start with baby steps. Find things in the Bible that contradict your own moral beliefs and state aloud that you disagree. Then move on to blasphemy. Lords Prayer backwards, etc. Do this until the indoctrination is gone. And all the while, find paths or belief systems that aren’t as rigid and will fit your life better and actually empower you. Because no one is empowered by Christianity or especially Islam.


OK, NikoTheCat, you may be right hand path. That’s a very strong path, different from ours, dangerous as well – but strong. And if you love complicated rituals with God names, Arch-Angels, Angels, the appropriate (and when I was doing it very hard to find) incense, plus candles, robes and sometimes a properly coloured stole - the rhp is waiting. Tie yourself in self-effacing knots until you’re completely fucking crippled by The Threefold Law of Return. That’s an oldie but a goody.

Thelema may be your scene. It’s lhp in practice to rhp ends. Just imagine it, you can send the rest of what could have been your life lost in the pointless mysteries of the Qabala and the English Gematria of LIBER AL vel LEGIS.

And while you’re at all that, study Taro cards online. Find a deck that speaks to you. There’s lots of decks, so take your time and research. When you find the deck, purchase it with a 100% natural material cloth to wrap the cards (sans box) and a 100% natural material bag that will fit the wrapped cards. That way your cards only ever touch one side of the cloth. Ever.

Don’t read the piss-weak little book that comes with most decks. Don’t read any books. Read the cards themselves – starting with The Fool. Taro cards represent energies. That’s it: Energies! Concentrate on the Major Arcana. It’s important to be able to see the card in your mind’s eye. If you can (and I can’t) see the card as an open door and walk into the card.

It’s best to draft an airtight contract to Yourself and sign it. The contract must set out a schedule. i.e., 22 days for one card of the Major Arcana each day. If you break your contract with Yourself, at least you’ll know what you’re really worth.

Then try three days for each of the 22 Major Arcana. Look for recurring images and the journey depicted. After that and having kept vigorous notes in your Journal you can buy yourself a book of what other people teach that the cards mean. Alfred Douglas The Tarot: The Origins, Meaning and Uses of the Cards is excellent.


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