Idk what i did. Honestly. Ive tried everything. Cant get gigs. I try to get bands together they fall apart. I try summoning help and its like i hit a brick wall. Idk what im doing wrong.
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Thought about it but no.
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Try watching this, see if anything helps:
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Thats the wired part. This has gone on longer than i even knew curses were real. Longer than… like before i started breaking my programming from years of evangelical indoctrination.
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You sound like an emotional vampire to me. Do you find yourself looking for sympathy through everyone u know by hammering sob stories into their brains?
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Whoah try writing this sigil out and carrying it in your left pocket for a few days, don’t worry about trying to open it or anything;
If your problems stem from any attachments due to religious upbringing and programming the sigil alone will help. Note carefully any changes and update this topic. 
if you own ANY divination items, like Tarot, Runes, even a deck of playing cards, place them in a sealed metal tin or wrap them in aluminium baking foil, do the same to any Bibles, grimoires, anything that can conceivably act as a “portal” to other realms. If you have board games, place them in the south-west corner of the room you use least often.
Try making an equal-armed X-style cross under your bed with salt, as well, not like + orientation but like X - diagonals.
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Have you looked into the norse concept of Hamingja?
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My leprechaun gave me this song to sing to you for good luck. May you follow the rainbow to it’s treasured source. Blessed Bee.
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No. Im the opposite. Im just having a bit of a breakdown. Im the one who holds everyone together. I take care of everything. Today i broke.
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Honestly you seem like you have a sense of humour which is usually lacking in professional victims. 
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Wow. Ok thank you. Im on it!
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Thanks i try. Keeps me going. You know… laugh or cry.
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Nooo. What is that?
i know this is not the answer you seek,
but it’s a signpost towards it.
Azazel says you’re not ready for the change yet.
He tells me you’re starting to transition,
but you’re clinguing onto the old mindset currently.
If you want a recomendation:
Devote yourself away from Jesus.
What that “Savior” has given to you,
speaks for itself.
It’s time for you to come home.
Go with those Entities that natrually gravitate towards you.
The leading and callings are already in place for you,
but it’s up to you, to embrace it and walk the path.
- Besides Azazels clear insight,
i want to emphezice a specific point to you personally.
You need to forgett, more then you need to learn.
Most of your current life circumstance,
can only be overcome,
by changing your inner view of the world around you.
Seek tools for that.
Cleanse your mind and emotions.
Those steps will bring you the biggest leap of change,
currently.
Sincerely,
¥’Berioth
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Omg that idea never crossed my mind. Thank you for that. Wow. I have no idea how to do that! I… wow.
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In terms of your “bad luck” - curses upon you…
There is actually some in place,
just looking at that family situation.
However, those hold only power over you,
as much as you allow that.
Your Kids father wount become reliable anymore.
Scratch that off your list.
use the time seperated from them,
to build stability for yourself.
Deny further attacks from his side.
Use demonic help to get the law back into your favor.
Use it also, to start structuring your children’s lifes,
so they don’t come here in 15-20 years asking us for help like you just did.
And, for the moment, avoid unneccessary religious bullshit coming your way in daily life.
Even tho the Religious believers call it “blessing”,
those prayors can actually harm our magickal powers sometimes.
Not every prayor coming your way is an issue.
But you’ve clearly been overfilled with those already.
Sin,
¥’B
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To everyone… thank you for your time and answers. A lot of things for me to do and try. Which i think is good- as long as you can DO you feel better. So thank you. I do feel better. I have hope. 
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I feel like every time i try to summon i hit a wall. Like some part of my brain that leta you do this is “off” lol
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you’re right, i’ve seen walls within your psyche the moment i started reading.
However, the advice i gave you is tailored to adress these issues,
and will get you out of your false comfort zone.
It’ll be harsh, don’t get me wrong.
You’ll suffer while stepping out of that religious paradigm background.
But you’ll come out knowing your own power,
and realizing how much MORE you can do about issues,
instead of just taking them in, and swallowing those bitter pills as if it’s cola.
You mentioned 2 job degrees.
May i ask which jobs those are?
Maybe we can help you with setting up an opportunity.
Sin,
¥’B
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