Please don’t take this the wrong way, but stop feeling sorry for yourself. There is nothing wrong with you.
I apologize for MagikalVigilante’s behaviour. He was unnecessarily harsh, and that is not the way folks here should speak to beginners, but you can’t let it get to you. To be a successful magician, you must build a strong will, and thick skin because the spirits will test you.
Magick takes time and practice. It took me ten years to get good results with evocation. Ten years. You can read about my experience here.
There are many, many, spirits out there. If you get no results with Lucifer, then you shouldn’t give up on maigck, just try another spirit. Or another method.