So my life has been a crap shoot lately. Awhile ago, my mother died, then my eldest sister died some years later…then my last sister and Oma died a few months a part this last year…and just a week after my Oma dying…i find out my dad has cancer…
My mom died of cancer…
Okay so ive been dead afraid of my father dying like my mother did. Very anxious and beyond stressed. Its high grade but doesnt seem thats its spread. Bladder. Hes going to start chemotherapy after the immunotherapy didnt work. It doesnt seem serious enough for surgery yet (aka removing his bladder) which i guess is a good thing? But ive just been stressed.
Now mom never made it to chemotherapy. She passed away just a few months after diagnosis. So dads situation is definitely different. Hers was more advanced when we discovwred it.
But still, with everything, ive been quite stressed. Mostly a fear of being alone. Since ill quite litterly be the only one left…
I havent really done much spiritual stuff due to life
But recently i did meditate to Liliths enn just to try and destress. It helps when im stressed or whatever. Like an emotional release. I usually just mentally talk about whatever is bothering me when i do.
This time, i basically just poured out my heart about everything and my fears… i meditated for awhile until i felt some relief. Then when i stopped meditating (just when i felt ready to stop)…the time was 11:33
I was using headphones to just listen to the enn and not looking at the phone. I only needed to turn the phone screen on to stop the enn music when i was done meditating which is when i saw the time 11:33
Which made me do a “huh…hope thats a good sign”…
I wasnt looking for a sign or anything, just wanting to communicate with Lilith about my worries for the future. So hopefully it means she heard me… i hope…