My name is Bec and I am most definitely a newbie. I’m in my early 20s and have always had a fascination with the occult, supernatural, paranormal, etc. I think this is because I’m bored with life and monotony and I want confirmation that something else is out there. I think my belief system aligns with the law of one in most ways. We’re all made of “source” or whatever you want to call it, we come here for lessons, yada yada. I change my mind on it constantly.
However, I struggle a lot with fear and haven’t yet overcome that, so I have only ever done any kind of ritual once (if you can even call it that. Perhaps communication is a better term). I was taught about “guardian angels” growing up by my christian mother and I read that you can find your their name by writing the question on a piece of paper and leaving it. Then you would come upon the name at some point and would be gifted the knowledge that this is their name. You’d just know deep down. Well I did that when I was about 10, and the following day I walked into our shed and saw an old sewing tin in front of me with the name “Raphael” on it, and suddenly thought “Oh, of course, yeah”. So after learning who this Raphael is, now and again I’ll call on Raphael for some healing. I’m very sporadic and disorganised with my practice because I struggle with going to my job, which is very practical and scientific, and having these otherworldly interests. At the end of the day when I’ve been immersed in the practical world, I find it difficult to give any attention to spiritual practices.
I try to meditate but I find that when I start meditation I start seeing things I don’t want to see and having experiences that scare me (hello sleep paralysis hat man, how do you do?). I’m sure overcoming fear is some kind of life lesson that will appear to me over and over.
That’s about it for what I’m doing currently. Happy to be here and lurk for a bit. When the time comes perhaps I’ll be able to overcome my fears and get into practicing fully.