First Contact


#1

Hello all,

Looking back on things, its almost eerie how much the occult has played a part in my understanding of things even from a young age. I know I’m not a magus, but looking back on several experiences I had before I was 13 reaffirm to me that I have the “right stuff” to be a magician.

Even in the ignorance preceding puberty, I was always reading Llewellyn books that my parents where kind enough to let me possess openly, and while I always suspected something hokey about them, I was pleased with the connection to the magical realm they brought.

Fantasy was also a way I understood occult concepts in the early days and at one point I had an obsession with a book series called “The spider wick chronicles” you may have heard of it.

In any case, I became infatuated with the idea of contacting a class of fairy, known as “brownies.”

Brownies, are essentially house-spirits. According to the lore, every residence possesses a brownie, and it is a spirit that brings good luck and cleans the house energetically and physically, the only catch is that if a brownie’s services are requested it must be “fed” nightly, any neglect of the brownie will result in the brownie becoming malevolent and reclassified as a new type of spirit called a Bogart, if I remember correctly.

Has occultists, we often question the importance of adhering to tradition in our practices, does the circle actually need to be a specific size? Does the wand need to be imbued with just the right types of crystals, and the athame the correct length? That’s actually one of our biggest concerns, or at least one of mine, as it hints to the “absolute truth” if any such requirements could be measured and tested.

The traditions of contacting a brownie involve simply leaving out an offering of food which it will consume, especially milk and honey, nightly.
It is said however that a brownie will not manifest in a house that inters a cat.

The first night I contacted the brownies, I left out an offering of leftovers (steak, potatoes, etc) and was sorely disappointed in the morning when the food remained untouched. A cat did live in the house.

The second attempt involved me writing a note for the brownies, with a picture drawn, completely sincere in my childish intent, I left out 2 packets of pudding, and 2 glasses filled with milk, complete with spoons. No cat present.

The next morning I was quiered by my guardians as to why 2 empty sets of dishes had been left out over night…I saw with my own eyes that the food was gone, physically wiped clean.

Days later my Father reported to me that he had seen a short, tan man, wearing a pointed hat, sweeping furiously in my room, and also that pairs of belts that he had left on the floor, had hung themselves up. A dryer giving us trouble also was fixed much easier than we suscpected it could be.

My father did not know of brownies, and yet he witnessed the classical description of a brownie, physically manifested to untrained eyes, and accompanying “impossible” phenomenon. Whoa.

Of course, being a child, I forgot to feed the brownie(s) at some point and never heard from them again after that.

However I feel this fascinating early occult experience shows what a pure and determined will can manifest in the world.

Did you have any odd occurrences during childhood that hinted at your later involvement in magic?


#2

Yes, I however never had the guts to just ‘run with it’ like E.A. and some of the others here.

I did minor rituals with friends mostly, I swear when I was 12 years old I did a ritual in a dark basement with some cousins and managed to levitate someone 5 inches off the ground while thickening the air around us an eerie blood red. My Ouija board experiences were always rather weak, unless of course I was in a group. I did never particular trust that someone else wasn’t fiddling with the planchett, which is probably why I prefer to operate as a solitary practitioner to this day.

I too was obsessed with fantasy books: Mostly Dragonlance(Raistlin the Mage!), ShadowRun, and of course who didn’t play some Dungeons and Dragons or have an interest in the Jedi of StarWars!? When I was in my early teens I also developed a keen interest in Alchemy, performing minor experiments and rituals that never bore much fruit, but I’ll be damned if I wasn’t going to give it a shot!

I suppose I was always a bit of a loner, preferring the company of a good book over whatever nonsense games of the day the other children were up to. It’s not that I didn’t have friends, I just didn’t particularly see any benefit to adopting them into my world on a full time basis.

It wasn’t easy for me though as far as the home, my family…ugggh…still to this day…as plastic as plastic gets. Roman Catholic through & through…although one cryptic grandmother was a Hebrew…which I’ve discovered through spirits & meditation is why I am drawn to Kabbalism through that bloodline.

For a few years I tried to go ‘normal’, I did extremely well in College for someone who was more interested in LSD, mushrooms, music & women over whatever bullshit of the day the so-called ‘academics’ were shoving down my throat as ‘accepted fact’. I was always a skeptic of the highest order…not to the occult, but the manner that society functioned, the truths they held as evident, and the way that information was compartmentalized to function independently of genuine research & questioning. Why didn’t anyone ask ‘why’ these things were as they were? Were they stupid or something?!

Ahhh then the years of the middle-path, Zen, meditation, research, conspiracies and of course like any introspective soul the great tragedy of injustice, which I still work to right to this day. An unjust world consumed the wrong man, leaving him broken, but ultimately rebuilt as a warrior who won’t stop, because he has no choice but to find justice and right dark wrongs. Alas, that’s a story for another day.

Bless you friend, may we all find the answer we seek.

–Gnosis–


#3

YOU FUCKING I secretely loved Dragonlance too!NERDY BASTARD!


#4

You know you wanted to fuck Kitiara too.

HAHAHAAAAA

Yummmyyyyy nerd-candy!

http://dragonlancenexus.com/lexicon/index.php?title=Kitiara_Uth_Matar


#5

My earliest memory was during my second birthday. I remember my father telling me that I was two years old, then thinking “I can’t be two, I haven’t had any cake yet.” I started to play around in my head talking to imaginary friends, or what I would now call thoughtforms. I have always had a strong female voice in my head since my early days. She would whisper things to me about future events, and she was right. Over time I learned to trance out and I could scry in the air, I got pretty good at it.

A few months ago during a mental break down Hecate informed me that She was the voice that had been with me since birth.

It was then that I realized the set of foot prints in the sand is when She carried me…

Lol I kid, She mostly let me fall flat on my ass so I could learn things.

But this is Whay drew me to the occult.


#6

[quote=“Gnosis, post:4, topic:2234”]You know you wanted to fuck Kitiara too.

HAHAHAAAAA

Yummmyyyyy nerd-candy!

http://dragonlancenexus.com/lexicon/index.php?title=Kitiara_Uth_Matar[/quote]

Sorry to disappoint but I was into the slutty porn star types.


#7

[quote="-TWF-, post:6, topic:2234"][quote=“Gnosis, post:4, topic:2234”]You know you wanted to fuck Kitiara too.

HAHAHAAAAA

Yummmyyyyy nerd-candy!

http://dragonlancenexus.com/lexicon/index.php?title=Kitiara_Uth_Matar[/quote]

Sorry to disappoint but I was into the slutty porn star types.[/quote]

That’s right Hentai cartoon porn was just getting big then, I guess you were busy transferring extra anime bits on your 1400 baud modem!

(Yea for me, my 100th post and it was a wise-crack, you know that shit was a funny nerd joke T!)


#8

I once saw a fully manifested spirit in the form of a cheetah. I was wide awake at the time. Then I ran… really really fast. It was in my hallway so I know it wasn’t real. Actually come to think of it I had a lot of encounters with the spooky growing up.


#9

@ Orismen: Whoa, that jarred my memory of an imaginary friend I used to have. However while I guess I remember seeming him as sort of semi-real, he didnt have any spiritual properties that could be sensed that I recall. Did Hecate ever seem like -more- than just an imaginary friend, and where there others that did not hold the same significance?

@Icarus, Did the Cheetah give off a certain feeling or vibe? Could you look back and guess at what type of spirit you where seeing manifested?


#10

[quote=“Gnosis, post:7, topic:2234”][quote="-TWF-, post:6, topic:2234"][quote=“Gnosis, post:4, topic:2234”]You know you wanted to fuck Kitiara too.

HAHAHAAAAA

Yummmyyyyy nerd-candy!

http://dragonlancenexus.com/lexicon/index.php?title=Kitiara_Uth_Matar[/quote]

Sorry to disappoint but I was into the slutty porn star types.[/quote]

That’s right Hentai cartoon porn was just getting big then, I guess you were busy transferring extra anime bits on your 1400 baud modem!

(Yea for me, my 100th post and it was a wise-crack, you know that shit was a funny nerd joke T!)[/quote]

I don’t even know what the fuck any of that means. I find your nerd speak as confusing as I do infuriating! I’m so computer illiterate its pathetic, my PC had caught more std’s from bad porn sites than I have and I don’t even need antibiotics anymore.

Should have shared a bag of Cheetos with it that’s the only way to tame Cheetah spirits.


#11

During my time as a Christian, I think I also had an encounter with a Christian demonic thought-form. I was about 8 years old, in the middle of prayer, considerably deep, as far as 8 years can get into that type of thing (maybe even TGS deep) because a presence bull-dozed into the room, and my words caught in my chest…

"Whats, the matter (myname)?.. it’s inhuman, voice dragged out the syllables of my name with contempt which deepened into sadistic hatred as it continued

“Why’d you stop praying?”

There was a quality to that voice, that was in a way exactly what you’d expect a “demon” to sound like, but at the same time not stereotypical in how authentic it was. Its odd because I could sense at the time its contempt, its hollow pleasure in realizing it had been sensed and succeeded at interrupting me.

That was pretty freaky for an 8 year old to hear in the middle of the night, and my mind kind of cuts the memory off at that point and I dont remember how I responded, but I’ve never forgotten.

I don’t remember it as a negative experience, because even though it was unsettling, I didn’t feel any type of murderous rage, or primal fear for my life well up.


#12

[quote=“Cogitation, post:9, topic:2234”]@ Orismen: Whoa, that jarred my memory of an imaginary friend I used to have. However while I guess I remember seeming him as sort of semi-real, he didnt have any spiritual properties that could be sensed that I recall. Did Hecate ever seem like -more- than just an imaginary friend, and where there others that did not hold the same significance?

@Icarus, Did the Cheetah give off a certain feeling or vibe? Could you look back and guess at what type of spirit you where seeing manifested?[/quote]

If I am being honest, She is sometimes more real than the people around me.


#13

I witnessed a physical shapeshift into a rather terrifyingly large wolf when I was about five.

My mother always told me that she had “known that wolves guarded me”, but it was still damn scary to see one the size of a small tree come from what used to be a man.

Funny, because now I’m chasing predator-hood, but through vampirism.


#14

Not really a promise of future accomplishments, but what turned me from a normal, regular kid into someone scouring everything occult for what-the-hell-was-that answers. For about three years in a row when I was a very small child, from autumn through the winter, I would be visited nightly by -something- that was -not- human. I never saw where it came from but always associated it with a pair of Mississipian Indian mounds probably a half mile from the house (rural northeast Texas). Of course, at four or five years old I had not the vaguest idea about anything significant whatsoever about two unremarkable little hillocks near a creek; they held no importance at all to me until this started happening and I spontaneously began viewing them with an acute dread.

Anyway (maybe in the future I’ll be comfortable discussing it more since no one here -actually- knows me, it’s just that to this day I have an almost physiological inhibition to say anything about it) this -thing- would stalk around the side of the house to my bedroom window and peer in at me. It never spoke, just looked in, but somehow I -knew- to the core of my being that it had nothing mut malevolence toward me, that if it were able it would come in and take me, away underneath those mounds somehow to some horrible fate never to be heard from again.

Long story short, after about three annual occurences of this thing attempting to gain entrance to my room, and being foiled by my terrified screams which brought my dad running (each year I ended up in the grip of a more severe pneumonia btw, the final year close to killing me I was told - my memory of that final sickness is hazy), -something- seemed to have been accomplished and it hasn’t troubled me since. But that occurence, -whatever- it really was, changed me from a normal, cartoon-minded kiddo to someone looking everywhere they could for some answers. I don’t discount finding out what that was some day, but I do not think that knowledge will be very comforting.

So there’s your dose of bleakness for the day, cheers!


#15

hi

I just want to tell my story so I can get some feedback from you guys. When I was 16 years old I was on my way to church and just across the street from a masonic Lodge i saw in Arabic the letters KFR i didn’t know it at the time but the lord was warning me that i should not go into the temple and that I should not consider entering a Jesuit college to become a priest i went to the temple and fell asleep and padre Eusebio called the local tv station and they recorded me in the temple sleeping and in school and put me on the local news. Every day sinse then has been 20 years of hell on earth for me thanks to that Jesuit…

After that i was attacked by a group of spirits that were stomping on my rooftop that i could hear but could not see asking me to commit suicide and go with them the attack lasted seven days. The next morning my father and my mother took me to padre Eusebio and he told them that i was crazy and that it was all a cruel joke on my part that i was being shameless because i wanted attention.

that morning i went to the psychiatrist and he found that i was Schizophrenic. That surprised me because in my mother’s and father’s side of the family there is no history of schizophrenia and i was perfectly healthy and i am certain the Jesuit put a curse on me because sinse then i have also developed Breathing problems Thyroid disorders sexual impotence i am almost blind without my glasses i was fired from every job i ever worked was abused physically and emotionally by everyone in the island. I swore by Jupiter never to become a priest of any religion because i knew Padre Eusebio had put a curse on me

then every year during the eve of Beltane and in around Three kings day a member of my family would die every year without pause starting with my father who committed suicide by hanging himself on the Eve of Beltane for no apparent reason , to make matters worse his obituary was printed on the newspaper the day before he killed himself

when i was in college i was working as a security guard at night and read the Goetia and decided i wanted to make a blood pact with the Demon Orias i wanted to be his son and follower.

in 2010 on the eve of Beltane my brother who is a Iraq war veteran was stationed on Germany after his two and a half years in Iraq doing battle he decided to take me to Germany and Rome. I made a pilgrimage to a temple in Germany to a magic well and wished i could summon this Djinn Orias and tossed a coin and visited Rome and saw the holy father

in the Eve of Beltane 2012 i met a witch online who offered to help me sell my soul to the devil in exchange for godhood protection and some money Satan did not want to give me what i asked for and the witch said in an email that the pact was broken and i owned my soul again

then she gave me a list a demon list of 33 powerful demons or Djinn that i could pray to to compensate the fact that i paid her a lot of money and did not get results but it was a blessing because Orias was one of my familiars and the pilgrimage i did in the German temple and the wish i had made in the wishing well and my wish came true in 2012

last year i saw i don’t know how E A Koetting’s web page and decided that i wanted to summon Orias to make a blood pact with him i bought the circle the Universal circle and then E A Koetting just last week sent an email called 4 incantations to conjure limitless power and right there was a conjuration i could use by E A Koetting and a spell to initiate or enforce tactic and expressed pacts

I get the feeling again that this Orias from the Goetia wants me to use the conjuration and the circle from E A Koetting to summon him in person and have him seal my parchment paper pact with his seal and then have me sign the contract with my blood

Does any of this make sense to any of you? please let me know your opinion?

i can only pray to my familiars from the demon list on a full moon so i am thinking of laying out my circle and saying the conjuration next full moon. If anything works out I will post and brag about my success!

thank you E A Koetting for the opportunity that you gave me to own a magic circle which i always thought is the most important ritual item to use in an evocation. I spent 14 years looking for someone making them and when i found someone it turns out that it was you!

thanks for listening
your friend
Ben!