Hey all! I have lurked on this forum for more than a year now and FINALLY decided I should make an account and be active instead of creeping on everyone lmao. My name is Alicia, I also go by Ali☺️ I’m 27 years old and I’m from Washington!
I have been studying various forms of magick for about a year and a half. I love to read and learn so I have been studying demons, angels, and all in between. I would say my actual experience with magick is very meh. I have done simple things. Manifestations. Affirmations. I mediate. I’ve tried candle magick. I guess where I fail is I am having a hard time overcoming my skeptic side, did anyone else struggle with this? I was raised Christian so at first wanting learn was scary, I still feel like fear they drill into you is there still. So more than anything I have just read. I want to start connecting with angelic beings and it seems everything I do I block myself. So I guess I’m kind of asking for help too from anyone else that struggled with believing in the things they want to believe in, if that’s makes any sense at all😭 my family and a few close friends have made me doubt in my beliefs and sometimes I do feel silly which I hate but it’s always in the back of my mind which I feel messes things up for me. Sadly.
I have a 5 month old baby so a lot of my time is spent on him and I feel like I’ve slacked a lot on meditation and visualization and I’m wanting to get back on track, jumpstart my magical abilities, and truly start in the path I have been studying up on. I have seen Archangels of Magick is highly recommended for those trying to invoke and work with Michael and Raphael who are the two beings I have been actively trying to reach out to with simple sigil work and meditation but again, I seem to psych myself out here
Anyways, sorry for the long intro lmao. I’m happy to be here! I appreciate any and all feedback! Lookin forward to talking and learning from you all!
Skeptical is normal, approach magick with the curiosity of a child but the dedication of an actor.
If you act your way through a magickal ritual that’ll be good enough. Even if your brain is telling you, you are just acting and that you might not actually believe. That will still work.
First, just start doing magick.
Next create a journal, track each ritual and then other life stuff. I wrote good ideas down in my journal, as well as do self talk, and just having a way to brainstorm.
But keeping track of the rituals is super important so that then later you have proof that manifestations came to fruition.
If you want to get into angel, yes archangels of magick is very good. But also 72 angels of magick, and angels of Alchemy, by the same author.
I just recently felt angelic contact with the angel Dahniel from AA. It’s recommended that you don’t lust for angelic contact and that you let it arise naturally when you perform your magick. But those few seconds where I was in the presence of the angel, it was amazing. And it solidified magick being even more real than life itself.
Thank you for the advice! I have just recently started journaling just for something to do so that’s a great idea and I’ll start that right away!
Also I’m glad the skeptical side is normal, it’s been driving me insane lol. I always feel like I get in my own way and it’s annoying so I’m definitely going to take your suggestions and put them to use.
Your experience sounds so amazing! I wouldn’t say I’m lusting for it, but yeahh, it’s been super heavy in my mind for some reason. I felt extremely called towards AA Michael and like set my sights just on him for a bit. Videos about him starting popping up, Instagram posts, it was weird but it got me very intrigued. I did order Archangels of Magick yesterday and I’ll look into the others you mentioned. If you have any more book recommendations please let me know any time! I’m hoping to feel more comfortable in the lhp side of things as I grow but i still enjoy reading and studying it.
Scepticism is something I have been, and still am to a degree, struggling with aswell. I think thats only natural given that youre looked down upon as an outright insane person if you publicly speak about your beliefs honestly.
Im far from being beyond it but Id say I have advanced in this regard and its not holding me back as much as it used to do. The advice I would give is to always have your beliefs in the back of your mind while also trying to discern what could possibly be real from what is probably not real. The esoteric and occult communities are riddled with insane claims and plain lies, so being sceptical is also incredibly useful in order to not fall victim to some guru or stuff like that. But of course it can also be a hinderance when trying to dive into this world.
Try to realize that the strictly material world youve likely been brought up in is pretty much one extreme end of the spectrum, whereas outrageous magickal claims are on the other end of said spectrum. What Ive found is that usually the truth is a mixture of both of these extremes.
And also by realizing that you are more intimately familiar with the no-spirits-exist-world you will get closer to balance by tilting a little bit to the other side, even if only for a time. Alas you can at all times proclaim that its all rubbish anyway so you can always shift back if it becomes too extreme towards the other side.
Also I just started a journal in which I try to aim at giving a realistic outline of my progress from none-of-this-stuff-works-for-my-noobish-ass to ultra-accomplished-magickian which is something I felt like was missing when I just started out.
I just made the second post there a couple days ago and Im thinking that maybe it could be interesting for you to read. Feel free to check it out right here.
Thank you! I’ll go take a peek at your journal here soon!
I’m glad that my skepticism was understood lol. I didn’t want to come off like I don’t even believe in what I would like to do and what forum members talk about here. But yes, some of the stories I have read are rather… uhhh, crazy? So I’m taking my time reading through posts and experiences. As I said I’ve creeped on here for over a year and I definitely noticed there seem to be some people role playing? Idk what else to call it lmao. And the claims are very extreme so I’m trying my best to avoid those as of now until I’m better at knowing wtf is going on😂
Haha, well for one I would say that BALG is definitely one of the more serious forums Ive come across. But than I also started off in the Esotericism/New world scene so…well…thats not a very serious scene to say the least. But this forum is as good as it can get imo, so youre off to a great start!
And about the scepticism/not believing, I mean…it is important to question stuff. And it can even be dangerous to ‘try’ and believe stuff. Of course there has some believing with certain stuff but Im assuming it´s this curiosity in what to believe and what not to believe that brought you here.
So be assured that the point at which you are currently at, and the beliefs and lacks thereof, are totally valid and a good point to begin from.
I appreciate any and all feedback! Lookin forward to talking and learning from you all!
