I suffer from depression for almost my entire life. Almost don’t know how is life without it…But…sometimes chamans told me I was cursed too. The last time I was ‘cursed’ was when I did a love spell that backfired.
A year ago my sister called me to tell me the person who reads coca leaves for her, told her that I was cursed again. In order to calm my sister I told her that I was ok…not feeling bad, and the curse did not affect me. And never did nothing about it (Tho I’m not completely sure if doesn’t affect me because of my constant depression…symptoms are very symilar)
I bougth recently the “Magickal Protection” book by Damon Brand and started to do the Sword Banishing Ritual and the Master Protection Ritual.
But I am feeling very tired…more than usual. This is because the Rituals are “removing something” or just my normal “lack of energy”???
I have to say that of course I went to therapy, and of course I am taking meds for depression…but nothing ‘improves’…the meds keep me ‘balanced’…but they don’t take away the feelings.
I recommend you stop therapy and the meds. You’re depressed because you have stagnated in some way. Once you address this stagnation, the depression will go. It amazes me that so many psychiatrists and psychologists would rather dope someone up than help them address their hurdles.
I you’re happy discuss your current hurdles openly, feel free to post here. If you’d rather not share them publicly, my pm box is open
you know…my ayahuasca chaman told me the same once, but I wasn’t ready to leave the treatment. I’m very afraid of that, once I tried and the symptoms were like hell.
My life is very complicated and yeahh…I would like to share some things with open minded people. I recluded myself in home and work. I don’t have any friends or whatsoever. There was a time in my life where I was fighting that depression with parties, sex, alcohol, etc…but not anymore. And the people of that enviroment are not around anymore (they are still partying, lol…good for them I guess).
My symtoms started when I was abussed by and older boy, when I was 9 years old…and never went away…
Recently (about 3 years ago) I tried to follow my passion and was very succeful at it. So much that that succefulness came with a lot of envy and a lot of enemies. My life went to hell once again. I’m certain those people send me some curses…because I was worse than ever. I was suicidal, with post traumatic stress…etc. Those feelings calm down when I moved out the city…but return when I try to go back there. My chaman told me that I should not say that I have depression because those people tryed to make me more depressed. Was like my “weakness” and they knew it.
So…I was trying to get rid of this sickness since ever…and sometimes thing get mixed and confussed. Curses, or not…
Thank you so much…Onw more think I would like to tell you:
One of the methods those people who are my enemies use to get rid of female enemies is make friends first…and when you think they are friends and love you and respect you…they try to rape you (or they rape you)…because they know that will fuck you up. They know you are gonna be so bad emocionally, spiritually, psichologically, phisically, etc…that you are not gonna be a competition, you are not gonna be a problem anymore…and if you speak they are gonna say you are a liar, it’s your word against them…And I know many of them do rituals to keep them safe…(I don’t want to say the specific “field” but it is of course a field where you are famous and you depend on you reputation for living…they have corrupt lawyers, police officers as friends…etc)
This might sound odd, but you could choose a name for your “opponent” regardless of it’s origin. Try not to trick yourself into glorifying this enemy, but seperating it from your identity can be helpful.
As an example, name it Shithead. Try to learn the properties of Shithead. Is Shithead self-aware? Some psychic artifacts are not. Does Shithead feed on you or is it motivated by something else? What things remind you of Shithead? What things can harm Shithead?
If your problem really is psychological rather than spiritual then this method will still help. In that case, Shithead is a psychic artifact. Shithead is an object composed of mind. Whatever thoughts and feelings are made of, you and Shithead are made of. If Shithead can have an effect on your mind, your mind can have an effect on Shithead.
No one on this forum is a doctor and thus qualified to tell someone else to stop medically prescribed medications and therapy, and it is downright dangerous to do so and leaves this forum open to liability.
@G_I We do not know your life situation so I find it very foolhardy for someone on in internet forum to proclaim that you are depressed because of “stagnation.”
If you want to find alternative methods to help yourself, fine, but do it under a doctor’s supervision, not because a stranger on an internet forum told you so.
it is very interesting and very helpfull. One of the problems with therapy is that is hard to find a person who actually bealive in the spiritual and that led to the therapist to give you answers like the only problem is you and your crazy head allways…maybe I’m exaggerating, I know they try to do their best, but sometimes it feels like that. Will try! Thank you!!
Thank you so much. It is very true what you say. I don’t think @Biffa_Bacon is trying to be a “smart ass”. When you have depression and you take meds, this kind of advice is very common I think. (Like I said before my chaman told me this too). And of course live without the meds would be very great and cool, and you would dream of no taking anymore, but that’s not how reality works…if you need meds because you have diabetes you need the meds…and that’s it.
I would never stop meds without consulting my psychiatrist.
I think that when people tell you to “stop meds and therapy” they are trying to say that could be more than just something biological or psychological and it is worth it check that…I take it in that way at least. I know they are trying to help.
For example…my ayahuasca chaman always told me not to take the meds…he doesn’t trust in “western” medicine at all! But when I told him I was taking the meds anyway he told me not to stop…or at least…to stop very gradually and doing it with spiritual work to stop needing them. (I asumme ayahuasca sessions). Sadly I moved out the city and couldn’t do any sessions anymore…
I also take medication for depression, so I understand the feeling. I also have a degree in psychology and have a pretty good grasp on the mechanics of it.
I agree that a lot of doctors are too quick to reach for their prescription pad, but there is no denying that medications help people. I’d be dead if I didn’t take mine.
There is a very heavy anti-medication/anti medical establishment bias on this forum, and sometimes the advice people give can be extremely dangerous for people who might not understand themselves well enough and who are suddenly bombarded with diatribes against doctors by strangers when they ask about meds and magick.
I know @Biffa_Bacon meant no harm. It’s just that common sense is not all that common these days so I wanted to make sure that you understood that no one here is qualified to dispense medical advice so you should take everything with a very heavy dose of salt (meaning, think rationally about it).
I have been diagnosed with depression and general anxiety. The symptoms were always there, but trauma made then more pronounced. Hence the need for medication.
I confronted the source of my issues. Made life style choices. Started meditation and spellwork. Got off my meds without doctor’s orders.
I’m not saying that’s a path everyone should take. Some people’s brains are just wired funny and sometimes the meds are a necessity. But it does seem like doctors are a bit too hesitant to ween you off of things when you have a suspicion you’re getting things under control. Because some people will think they’re fine, overestimate the actual impact the medication had, and fuck themselves. Rinse and repeat. Anyway, one person’s experience. Weigh the pros and cons ect.
As for the curse. It sounds like you took care of it, or are at least in the process of it. Good job on that front.
Sorry to hear you had depression too Anxiety is the worst!! I had nigthmares of killing me every single fucking nigth. Argh…anyway you sound like a champ…and you sound you are better. Cheers!!
I know I will find my path…I know…strangely enough I know I have strength in me…
I am sorry that you are feeling this way. I know the feeling.
I have a question. Are you doing these ayahuaska sessions for treatment of the depression and meanwhile you are taking meds?
About cursing, it is not necessary to be like that, so don’t fall for it.
The book of Damon Brand is a good choice.
The forum isn’t set up to give medical(or psychological) advice, guidance or treatment of any kind and I believe that’s covered in the T&Cs, so remember to take any comments you read here as the opinion of that individual who is not medically qualified, and therefore speaking from personal experience and opinion.
