Deep Counsel Sought~ not so much a marriage bitch

Question. 35 years of marriage to a person slowly dying from having no kidneys and i am her Home Hemo Dialysis Care Partner.
i have gone from radical RHP priest theologian, to just as radical LHP Demoniphile Warlok, over a span of about 15 yrs. She, hellz forbid- a White Lighter on her [best? worst?] day.
our persecutor neighbors i have been working various vengence warkings on, though mostly right now doing 'lesser magick, aka, Doing this and thats in their view to ‘prepare the ground in their heads’- ala Sun Tzu, for when I release the Tsunamis which I hope will result in the sure execration. i have no guilt for shit… i told her one tiny little item I was doing and even knowing my scorched earth infantry annhilation of mine enemy persona- was so revolted by ‘The Evil So Evil’ of it- well, she would rather secretly flip them off as we drive by than whatever it is I am doing. {Cleansing my Mt. Belial of vermin in the larder-- how is that bad??:shushing_face::smiling_imp:}
So I am finding her firing off little sorta subtle 'Don’t do thats!" as, oMg! they may call the cops on us again for anything or nothing and it wrecks my 'peace and tranquility and I do not wanna spend what is left of the rest of my life with all that bad energy… blah blah :face_vomiting::nauseated_face::nauseated_face:!!! So even though i 'always do what I want anyway which results in bad sad fukit whatever, or cops coming to out door while she in on dialysis-- [which they cannot now due to my fencing and dogs now out to the street…:fu::fu::fu: !!:wink::upside_down_face:
Nearly worse- she is now wanting to do some Light Wicca lite [I would say clash of the titans, but it will be far more of a squish of the Light Slugs. But I will try to be as tender and respectful as I can. With me, she get the full Buddhist 4 Noble Truths and Noble 8fold path Compassionate Loving kindness— 99.999% of the time. Her former beliefs that the real purpose of marriage is to lasso the man and keep him calf [goat]-tied— well has left few hoofs in her face FIGURATIVELY! BUT… ugh, she still longs for more rope. and I long for a world without borders and signs-- lol
but, anyone else have any such in house “color wars”? she seems frankly now freaked out as i drink happy hot cups of wrath of blood and outer Darkness like fish drink water-- and she is the serious flip them off when they can’t see you. {I am fukn Infantry “FOLLOW ME!” fuk that hill and I don’t care if I do die! !!} And she is really bucking against the church I am starting and wants the meetings anywhere but on our property— fine. but I also know she will work to sabotage meetings etc with scrambling her dialysis schedule etc… knowing that will work worse for her than me. ugh.
anyone got some good Demonic black Salve for the brain based on some experiance???
Thanks

Why do people feel the need to thrust their personal believes onto other people, even love ones?

I guess you still love your wife?

Seduce her. Brake her free will down. Make her your love slave.

Enjoy corrupting her. Have some evil fun making her your personal love slave for the rest of her days. She might actually enjoy her life for once.

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