Hoping someone might either relate to this or have some simple advice for me. After giving it some serious thought I realize that the biggest reason I barely practice as much as I could and probably should, is due to a lack of trust in myself. I have for instance been meaning to work a simple binding spell (to stop a slightly unstable stable person from constant causing havoc). I have the understand of what to do and I know I could well just partly improvise it and use emotion to drive intent. But this morning I once again second guessed myself about colours to use etc. it’s the same for every working I try or consider doing, the second guessing on directions wording colors anything at all to not just get it accomplished my own way.
It’s hard to leap in, so what if you made the decision - for one month, from the beginning to the end of any given piece of magickal work, you’re going to trust yourself completely as an experiment, and see what happens, and resolve just during that month to not second-guess?
Honour the rational side of your mind, which after all is only trying to protect you and keep you sane, by giving it a framework for this instead of saying “Well sorry common sense, but you gotta stop bugging me now, because I want to talk to invisible demons and stuff”!
Honestly keeping your shit together and the balance between when to let go fully, and when to be rational, is at least 50% of the thing of being successful with magick, and not letting it screw you up.
if you were a nursery-school teacher for example, you could switch between the protective mindset that knows how to talk to someone whose brain still doesn’t work properly yet, and then having a metting with your bank manage for a loan, I mean we do this stuff all the time, so you just need to contextualise it so your brain doesn’t freak and think you’re asking it to cease common sense completely.
But if you try it for one month, you have an end date (or at least a date to review things) and it’s long enough to see how it works for you.
Good advice from the Lady. Here’s my opinion: It sounds like the ego getting in the way. The ego exists to protect the personality. Part of spiritual growth is destruction of the ego in order to free the mind. When we begin to enter the realm beyond normal human experience, it terrifies the ego and it does what it feels it must to protect our monkey brains. Sometimes it’s subtle, like making you second guess yourself, other times it can cause pure terror. The ego needs to be taught its place, and be put in it.