Hello to the forum,
Allow me an intro and a little background before I touch on the subject, this being my first post. My name is Ben. I’m a driver by trade and a natural born rebel who loaths and disdains conformity and “surrender” at my core. As I see it I was born in the South for a reason! Just recently, after a pleth of upheaval and a good deal of cleansing pain, I’m finally coming to terms with my nature. Above all, that inner voice, that alluring and unshakeable pull toward the Left Hand Path that no one destin for it can shake away, no mater how much evangelical hellfire and brimstone is cast at them in the name of control through fear. I’ve been listening to various recourses and reading for a while, and have decided to dive all in. Now to the topic. While scrolling through Eric’s videos on YouTube, I came across the one he did on the Black Sun visualization. Knowing that visualization absolutely works, (see reference to upheaval aforementioned) I eagerly endevoured to undergo his instructions. Sitting here today, I’ve not felt THIS ALIVE in quite a long time! I’m regaining insight and wisdom I’ve not had since my teens. Seeing things as more pliable and “gray” rather than black or white and absolute. Then the one thing I can hardly pathom and thought myself almost totally incapable of for quite awhile. An abillity to actually forgive other people and myself for the trespasses against me! There’s a since of calm, and peace within that I could only long for just days ago. And an old dream or two has popped back up with a renewed since of assurance in their achievement. It’s good stuff, but it makes me wonder. I recall Eric saying that there would be pain and a tearing apart of old beliefs associated with this. So is this just a fluke? What can I expect from here? Perhaps since I’ve already gone thru a process of pain and examination this is where I may receive pure enlightenment, or maybe something more was in the coffee pot at the truck stop this morning? Any insight from one who’s done it would be greatly appreciated. Also, will there be a problem with making this truck a “rolling temple” of sorts for ritual, or is it best to be in one place consistently? Well that’s my long winded intro slash question. (Rand and Solzhenitsyn would be so proud!)