The person I am meant to be with and I have been through a lot. When I say that we’re supposed to be together there have been readings about it. There’s been confirmation of it even when I said no matter what the answer was I was going to accept it. The problem is not me; it’s him. Nothing ever works out with him with anyone else. It’s not like he doesn’t know it, he does. But he does what he wants to do even though he keeps getting punched in the face every time he does it. He even tells me he knows that we’re meant to be together and was commenting about what kind of engagement ring to get me, so I am not attempting to put somebody into something that they don’t want. The problem is - I don’t know what word I want to use here - that he continues to try to find what we have with someone else even though it consistently fails him.
We were together recently for the first time in a very long time and I became pregnant. We weren’t even trying although we do want to have children together. I would like to bind him so that this bullshit will stop. I am simply trying to stop his wandering around because it’s hurting me, him and my son (not his biologically). It’s also hurting our unborn children because the stress caused me to miscarry.
I don’t know how to explain this part but I think this board is probably the best one to do it on. When we are apart, his life is absolute garbage. It falls apart. I’m talking major stuff. He’s had numerous Apartments fall apart on him with major flooding, problems with the floors, the rough caving in, Etc. His father even died and he was incredibly healthy. The same thing when he got his house. He’s had it for several years and before he couldn’t get any of the people on the phone to do the work needed. All of a sudden I’m around and they’re picking up the phone, coming and doing it. When I am around everything that has been wrong all of a sudden makes a 180 degree turn for the better. I did not do anything for it to be that way that’s just the way that it is. He cannot even perform sexually with anyone other than me.
It’s not like we’re in our twenties or even 30s. This isn’t like he’s young, let him cat around and sow his royal oats or anything. It’s kind of embarrassing at this point that all of his friends are married with kids and he’s still fucking up for no reason. I feel like a binding is the only way to get him to stop fucking up all of our lives. The baby I lost was not just mine it was his as well. I didn’t even get a chance to let him know that I was pregnant. I just want to fix this so that we can move on with our lives.
Anyway, I know this was long. I guess I needed to get it out of my mind. Thank you for reading.