Asking For Help

So long story short i’ve gotten myself into a big rut and lots of entities don’t want to be around me unless i change. i’ve declined most help but again long story short. i’m asking if anyone is willing to guide me or give me tips or anything to help me heal, wheather that’s an ego change or thought patterns or ways not to think negative anything helps.

i need it and long for it and even getting myself into this hole i want to keep trying even tho i messed up. that fire still doesn’t die so, if i’m damned if i do and damned if i don’t, i’d rather keep going. i feel lost and stuck with healing because i don’t know where to start i feel i need this topic of “start by listing triggers” or “start by analyzing before you talk” etc.

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Hey, have you tried Lady Evas whiteboarding method yet? :slight_smile:

Maybe a clean slate will guide you out of the rut you’re currently in

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If you feel that writing about these things might help to sort the beginning of your healing journey out, you could start with a journal (we have a journal section here for whatever is coming to your mind, for example if you’d like to have input and if you feel comfortable enough to put yourself “out there”. Otherwise I’d recommend a simple notebook). Keeping a journal helps me to identify patterns :slight_smile:

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Well, it sounds like you’re a bit down in the dumps at the moment my friend.

I guess its a little hard to be specific here given the limited information. But I do suggest that diversifying your experiences is always a good place to start-especially as you’re stuck in a rut.
This can be little things to begin with. Go for a walk somewhere you haven’t been before.
Getting some good solid exercise (or try different forms if you already do that)- exercise is very healing.
Try writing a few stories, or some handcraft.

It can be anything, just little breaks in what you usually do. Its a small start, but a good way to open the road to bigger changes.

This next one is going to sound strange, but if you try it, you will almost certainly start to notice changes. At least three times a day, stand up tall, feet wide apart, hands on hips, chest puffed out, chin up, grin (even if you have to force it). Hold this pose for at least two minutes.
For simplicity, think of the pose superman stands in and mimic that.
The human body actually has hardwired chemical responses to this. In particular, it produces beneficial changes in cortisol and testosterone levels. In a few days to a couple of weeks, you will start to notice positive changes.
I suggest you look up the research of neuroscientist Dr Amy Cuddy on this pose. It is very interesting.
I have most of the people I do hypnotherapy work on do this as homework and the results are often quite significant.

Once you have a clearer idea of what you want to heal from a symptomatic standpoint, it may benefit you to find a good hypnotherapist to help you reach the underlying causes and help guide parts of your healing journey.

The fact that you’re asking people for guidance means that somewhere in you, you have the motivation to do the work to heal. That is a very important and strong foundation to begin with. It may not feel like it right now, but you’ve already taken the first steps on the path to healing. The more steps you take down that path the easier it will become and the easier it becomes the more steps you will take down that path.
The question is, are you going to take the next steps today, or are you going to take them tomorrow?
Either way, I want you to know that healing is one of those things that creeps up on you. Even if you don’t feel it at first, its happening. Over time you can allow yourself to begin to notice the progress that you are making, once this starts to happen you may become aware that your healing is happening faster and faster and at more and more profound levels.

You may find that you start to notice little details that you hadn’t noticed before, perhaps in your environment, in objects, in situations in your life or even in the way your body moves. You can notice how these details change how you think about these things in tiny ways, and how these tiny changes in the way you think about these things translate to much larger changes to how you think in general.

I was in that place too not that long ago. Being trapped in a hole, needing to get out but not knowing how or where to start. I have have more healing to go, but I’m most of the way out now.
Back then I thought escape was too big, too complex, that there was just so much more dirt raining down on top of me in that hole that I would never be able to claw my way out.
But I climbed slowly. Sometimes slipping back. After a while I realised that although I may fall back three feet, I had actually climbed four first. As I started to become aware of that, each fall merely served as proof to me that I had climbed higher- if I hadn’t climbed higher I couldn’t have fallen back down.
Over time I fell less and less frequently and less and less far, on the whole I had climbed so far without actually noticing how far I had come to lift myself out of where I had been.

You can definitely do this. Small steps. Knowing that every time you falter, it just proves that you have progressed further.

I would take it as a great favour if you would try a little mental exercise for me. I would like you to take some time each to imagine what it would be like when you the hole is well and truly behind you, when you are healed. As you imagine this, consider what you would look like? How would you stand? How would you breath?
What kind of environment would you be in? What would the sights, sounds, sensations and smells of that environment be? How would this healed future you react to situations? What they think about? How proud would they feel about how far they have come in climbing out of that hole?
I would really like you to spend maybe ten minutes a day getting into that future scenario in your imagination. Just play with it and allow yourself to experience all of those considerations above in your imagination.

I look forward to hearing your thoughts

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