The first step in awakening is betraying your own thoughts.
2 Likes
Iâve had those fears. Long ago I used to worry about my sanity,but now I worry about the sanity of those that come into contact with me. After being in the occult for so long Iâve become used to the kinds of things that can happen. People unaccustomed to it have very adverse reactions to seeing strange things.
11 Likes
I had the presence of mind to record an insane freakout i had when my chakras opened violently, but while i looked crazy and possessed on tape, the actual experience was super blissful. Iâm not afraid of losing my mind, iâm more afraid and resentful of restraining it. I want to lose the brakes and not care about the possibility of crashing. Someday I wish i could be as free as some of you in this thread and fully embrace the crazy. Is it really crazy if itâs just yourself but without being censored?
1 Like
Iâve been an outcast all my life. And when I was in elementary school and middle school it was hard. It was like they were egging me on to lose it and set the school on fire by accident or something. They knew me for what I was and hated it, yet secretly admired the power I wielded.
On the subject of losing my mind, you donât even want to know what society has labelled me with. Schizophrenic, emo, degenerate, rebel, and countless others.
Whatâs clear to me, humans are scared of what they donât know, yet have this drive to prove themselves right. And what they donât know, they must prove impossible. âWell, nobody I know can do that, I doubt you can eitherâ but, notice how they just keep pushing you to their limits. They want you to lose control. They want to lock every last one of us up and throw the key into an abyss. They are literally testing you just like Azazel would peel back the top of your head to show you the parts of the mind you donât walk in. (Not just Azazel, of course, just using an example)
Life is a test. Are you going to take it and have the possibility of failing? Or are you going to make your own tests and reality to live in?
5 Likes
Trust me if you work with the wrong thing, or donât use proper protection you will go mad from this stuff. That being said what youâre describing is pretty normal for most people on the path. Because magick takes a certain level of skill to physically observe there is always going to be that ounce within your mind of âomg its all in my headâ and keeping your faith in your practice so far, in my experience anyways is the only way to combat that.
As someone whom suffers from real world insanity and quite frequently I might add I asure you that if you are practicing the occult or magick in general and seeing results youâre not going mad. That insecurity can be quite a painful one that tends to haunt the magicians of itâs feather. But note it usually is just that fear of whta others think, and their personal failure to wake up or see a truly magickal experience before them.
There will always be people that no matter how sane you come across to will deem you of the sort for simply believing in magick alone. You certainly arenât pretending. I mean how far youâve probably come and how far youâll go. If it really was simply an act why would you be here? If people deem you crazy the issue is not that of yourself but that of their deluded perception. They have more in common with somebody who is insane by my definitions through ignoring the magick before them than you do of that being on a spiritual path.
To quote a good former friend âYouâre not crazy. Youâre just awakeâ.
And to quote myself âanybody who canât see that is the truly deluded oneâ
9 Likes
@ChiNami a lot of people go crazy on this path. Iâm not saying that there arenât people that are crazy out of this path though.
Going back to the world is not a choice. Being Right Hand Path or Left Hand Path was never a choice to anyone - itâs an illusion to think we have a choice. We are fruit of the Gods and they want us to âworshipâ them to get things flowing, 'cause they also feed on that âworshipâ (they get more powerful).
If I could I would not be either RHP or LHP. Now Iâm currently more interested in the LHP though, to learn more things from this side of the game (meaning from the deities themselves).
But yeah we donât have any choice - thatâs what Iâve heard from countless spirits before: âwe are slavesâ while I was still going to light places. Also, if you quit the LHP youâll get unprotected from attacks and things in your life will surely not flow as easily.
Itâs silly to think we need magick to be able to enjoy more decent kind of living⌠but yeah we never created that⌠the need for magick comes from the Gods⌠and Gods taught us magick⌠so⌠thatâs what they want us to do.
I was thought: âwhat is the point in life? I didnât create my soul - I never asked for any of this. Whatâs this for??â. So, you didnât ask to be a soul neither, you were created to be, so you are because you were created.
1 Like
I think in my case i started getting into the occult because i had ALREADY lost my mind and was having a bad time.
4 Likes
Yeah donât worry ⌠I feel crazy too
Guess we all feel at some point
But for me ⌠I do what I love to do and have no intention to harm anyone
And I think that is the most important thing
6 Likes
Iâm not afraid of losing my mind because of practicing LHP but because of not doing it lol. I mean everyday we are manipulated by media : internet, tv, music, movies⌠so we donât even know if our minds arenât already altered. I guess mine already is.
3 Likes
Very true. I used to worry that manipulating people was a bad thing, but then I realized that they are already manipulated anyway, sometimes to do things that are counter productive to my goals.
2 Likes
Welcome @Jorjet. Please make an introduction in the NEW MAGICIAN AND INTRODUCTIONS area, and tell us about yourself and any experience you may have in magick. It is a rule of this forum.
1 Like
All of the above, darling. Be as Reckless and as ruthless as possible, feed the ego, indulge your inner desires, and do whatever the hell you wish.
People may say this things like itâs a bad thing, but I consider all of those titles to be a mark of Honor.
Just thought Iâd throw that out there.
1 Like
Sometimes I joke with myself that Iâm already crazy, and concerning spirituality, indeed it proposes an higher âmental healthâ where the mind is cleanier than usual, at the start of the path (for example in Hermeticism) an equilibrium is even purposely broken.
To reply a few of my very own doubts, I have to remember that while practicing Magick the key is definitely to believe; afterwards Iâm encouraged to check adherence to reality.
1 Like
Itâs probably a good thing to stay grounded some by making sure to take care of tasks of daily living, enjoy some time in nature, socialize a bit, etc. Sometimes I enjoy magick almost like conducting science experimentsâseeing what seems to work while playfully acknowledging the element of uncertainty involved. Besidesâthere does seem like there are some societal forces and peer pressures in the world that do try to make people conform to some mundane paradigms. So I acknowledge to myself that I am doing magick rituals, reading about magick, etc., just because I want to do so, even if someone else might judge it as weird or crazy, etc. Some other people will be prone to judge others anyway, no matter what we do or say, so I donât want to waste a lot of time or energy jumping through hoops for anyone who is predisposed to judge me in a negative way. Iâm not a danger to myself or others (sort of the legalize that is used to involuntarily commit someone for psychiatric reasons) so I feel like I should claim the freedom in my own home to do what I want. The only way I could ever become dangerous to others would be if I was in self-defense mode, like a home invasion, if someone attacked me, that sort of thing. And the doctors I have had donât think I need any kind of psychiatric meds, so thatâs pretty cool.
3 Likes
As one poster wrote, the occult is what keeps me sane. I have an anxiety disorder and PTSD, so life is extremely tough for me at times. Rather than talk to DRs that just want to toss pills my way and shoo me out of their office, I can just talk to a spirit and get whatever guidance I need. They wonât take the anxiety and emotional trauma away, but Iâm learning how to deal with it better. I get great advice on how to deal with my anger, anxiety and animosity. Iâm not judged, Iâm not looked down upon, Iâm not talked down to, the spirits with whom I communicate are patient and kind and just sit while I cry or vent.
Even coming here to talk about this stuff, nobody ever judges me or anyone else. This is what keeps me sane.
10 Likes
I thought about it, But the Occult actually calms me down. and I focus and react better in life. I love it best decision I did in my life. we live and learn, just overcome your fears.
6 Likes
It all comes down to what âlosing your mindâ actually means. Yeah, youâre doing something thatâs against the norm. Maybe if someone saw you doing a ritual he may think youâve lost your mind. But if I see someone sitting in front of the TV with an open mouth, watching trashy reality shows and eating fast food every day, I think they have lost their minds.
Being out of the norm, being âdifferentâ (youâre actually not different, you just donât fill your mind with trash) has got nothing to do with losing your mind.
5 Likes
No matter how crazy you think you are, unless you have serious thoughts of ending your life, Do NOT take psychiatric meds, they will fuck you up with the side effects
7 Likes
One is insane only when their perceptions and/or conceptions are disconnected from reality. The occult practiced correctly never keeps one insane for long, or without purpose. It also tends to make one not fear shit.
2 Likes
Beat the fear out of yourself!
if you arenât willing to go âcrazyâ then you will never be receiving the truth from the Gods and Goddesses. sorry to say but the path is walked when you decide to let the spirits fully possess you for several years.
(âŚhafthor likes drinking to excess lol)
1 Like