Well I wasn’t quite sure where to drop this monster of a post, because it involves a little bit of several different components in combination. If it needs to move, so be it (it’s heavy, though - if you don’t like novels just steer clear lol).
The obstacles taken care of through the magickal means described here are what lay behind my lapse in activity here on the forum recently. I’ve already text-dumped an account of the simultaneous working with Raphael that also took place at this time (and if you waded through that one my granddad is still making a miraculous turnaround, Raphael is seriously the man!); once I had conveyed to that Archangel my Will, I then had to attack the obstacles impeding the progress of my own life.
I’m going to veer more on the side of privacy, good taste, and legal sensibility here and not provide the exquisite details of what I got myself into, hehe. All I will say is that my employment is within the American military, and the march of liberalization and the weakening of the physical and mental quality of people in general these days means that some ways of doing things and handling situations (or people for that matter) are subject to heavy scrutiny and punitive action by those who have never had to risk death or even discomfort.
So I found myself facing punitive action of some sort, over some thing. This could have restricted my freedom, my plans, my pride - well, suffice to say I had no good reason to submit to such a thing (very interestingly, this only came up immediately after my successful evocation of Raphael to heal my grandfather, and I do think I will puzzle out some significance to that). So, I took my ass-chewings like a man, kept my composure, spent my time pretending to be fully attentive while employing the simplest “direct magick”, as I’ve heard it called here. I focussed on the awareness of quick and efficacious spirits willing to eager to help all around me, and mentally directed them to “fly forward at speed, and clear the way of all obstacles between my self and my freedom”. I used my controlled breathing to “regulate” this, just a concentration aid of focussing on the inhale and encouraging these servitors on their way on the exhale. So I was released to go home and report in for further judgment in the morning.
My drive was spent lightly meditating to awareness of these helpful little serving spirits again and verbally thanking them for what they had accomplished thus far, and urging them not to rest until I had well and truly assured my freedom. They seemed the type who were happy to do the work for its own sake.
When I reached the house, I decompressed, had some water, stretched, looked up maximum possible punishments, ensured that I was comfortable and imperturbed by them so that I was not acting from fear but from power - and after these things I prepared for ritual action by fully dwelling on exactly why I would not allow these things to happen and affect my plans for the future. This conviction very much possessed me, and I kept that powerful energy with me to use as “fuel” in the ritual.
First I went to the altar I keep for Odin in my bedroom. I knew enough to go ahead and bring the bottle of vodka, lol (Luksusowa - it’s Polish, and potatoey, and delicious!). I offer Odin whiskey or mead generally, sometimes beer, but didn’t have any on hand on this occasion and I knew that he wouldn’t shun the (great) drink offered in honest goodwill. I lit my candle, poured him one, and just talked about it. This casualness is because I have a connexion with the Allfather reaching back to long before I ever began trying to learn magick, and he is the closest spiritual entity I would describe as having something similar to a “pact” with. I have made modest offerings and discussed with and learned things from him ever since I first sought his help in teaching me about the runes.
So, talking to Odin was not a part of the ‘ritual’ that I had decided to perform; it was just taking the time and paying the respect of telling him in person about this thing I was facing in my life, and what I wanted from the situation and why. What I know for a fact was important to him was that I did not ask him to “save” me, or do all the work for me. I told him what -I- planned to do about the situation, and only then asked him, as a friend (and I do consider us as friends, we have a stated loyalty concerning his willingness to teach me and my willingness to learn), to watch my back in this and keep me from making a stupid mistake; to stand by me and help me do my utmost to maintain command of the direction of my own life. We then drank some vodka and talked about small, unrelated things. Importantly, Odin re-affirmed our friendship and assured me that all would be well, but that it was always proper to be generous with those who are helpful to you. What did Odin ask of me, as his boon, of sorts, for helping me in this? Only something that, itself, would help me and teach me, that’s just the way he is.
Odin wanted me to commit, to promise him, that I truly would undertake something I had asked him about as well as cast the runes over not too long ago: a cross-country trek through rural America as a temporary nomad after my enlistment is over with. I solemnly agreed, and I will keep that promise. Also, Odin urged me to perform a divination before the actual ritual. This, too, is so characteristic of the Allfather! Notice how he did not simply tell me why I should divine on this (which, i think you always should, pre-ritual), or what he saw wrong with the plan taking shape in my mind - in his eye, if I wanted to be informed in the way I needed to be then I should do the work!
I had, over the hours and minutes, become convinced that Belial was the perfect co-conspirator in my destruction of the legal shackles that threatened to bind me. I had worked with him briefly once before, he had come through swiftly and powerfully, and everything about his uncompromising intensity and legendary disdain for the impositions of external law were screaming at me to swing my decision in favour of evoking him for my ritual. I had, rather presumptiously, even taken the time to draw his sigil, grab some special candles, and set up my ritual room for an evocation of Belial so I could take swift and utterly decisive action just as soon as I had performed the divination for these other details that were to inform the further crystallization of my impromptu calling.
Then it came to the divination itself. I did this with my Thoth deck as it seemed best suited, and I definitely wanted the kind of deep-reaching exploration of the causes and roots themselves that this deck can be so great at revealing.
I began laying down cards spelling out the causes, the present circumstances, the ends most prominent for both performing ritual and just sitting on my ass. Good, good, all good, this all makes sense, and yes, perfect success is indicated by taking the ritual route. Then, because I’m pedantically thorough once I sit down to divine for myself, I investigated the suitability of Belial for this ritual operation. I’ll just spell this one out: the Eight of Swords. Interference. I knew at this point exactly what Odin had wanted me to find out for myself. Sure, ritual was the answer to achieving the outcome I wanted - but by all evidence here, working with Belial was just not the way I needed to go about it!
Now, this is not to say anything negative about Belial, universally applicable consequences for working with him, or his suitability to these types of rituals. What the cards further spelled out, was that working with him for this goal at this time, was not best for me. The illustration for the Eight of Swords depicted many fine weapons, but they were acting against one another rather than together for one goal. I had just worked with Raphael, and archangel. I had even more recently received assurance from Odin, a Norse god, that he would act in my interests as my friend in this. What I needed to do, no matter how incredibly well-suited to this endeavour Belial may have been in any other circumstances, was to perform a ritual that complimented, rather than contradicted, the energies already in motion on my behalf working toward multiple goals.
One other thing I’ll mention from that reading because it will become prominent later, and then I’ll get to the ritual itself. I was looking for my ‘Weapon’ (same concept as the ‘weapon rune’ in EA’s three-rune sequence from the divination course or maybe the e-book), the thing I should bear in mind, the sign I should look for to prompt me to action, the Watchword of my endeavour. Six of Disks. Success. Now this had a personal meaning to me during this reading, because for a lot of my readings about personal matters direct me consistently to instead invoke and consider Victory as my ideal to embody, just the idealization of the entire concept of Victory itself as this embodiment of divinity.
What I will name as the very important distinction here between Victory and Success (I mean, what is the difference?!) is that it was very important for me not to have the attitude of winning in-and-for itself but of opening up the way to the achievement of my own goals. In other words, the truly significant thing about this whole ritual action is that it was not done out of fear of some legal consequences for something I myself did in the first damned place. It was a conscious, Willed decision choosing one outcome rather than another. I considered not “victory/defeat” but “what paves the way for me reaching my goals?” If you get what I’m trying to say here. It may seem like an insignificantly tiny distinction but it was very important for me to make. So, on to the ritual.
I cleared away Belial’s sigil and the candles - I would save the sigil for a future work with Belial (that was drawn for a reason, I’m persuaded), as well as the candles. I had never said anything or formalized it with any particular action, but in my mind I had set those candles in the ritual area with the pre-ritual intent of using them to communicate with Belial so it seemed kind of crappy for me as a host to use those for conversation with someone else.
While I was putting these things away it kind of settled naturally into my mind that I should be enlisting my ancestors to work with myself and Odin. It was perfect, their energies would match up wonderfully and honestly this gave me an excuse to develop a closer bond with them through working together on this. I brought the vodka into the temple because the white liquor matched with my conception of the alfar, the ‘white ones’ as the early Scandinavian departed ancestor-spirits were known (later as elves).
So I called on them, my ancestors, spiritual helpers, and friends. I poured a small drink for those gathering around to hear what I had to say, and then I told them plainly of what had happened. About my plans for the future, and how I had resolved that I would not allow this to interfere. I asked for their help in this, I asked that they be willing to work with my great friend just as with myself. I remembered what the Allfather had advised me earlier, and declared that upon confirmation of my continued freedom I would cook a large roast, with vegetables, broth, bread - everything. I would take my time making an awesome roast, then remove the tastiest, juiciest cut with plenty of fixings and offer it to all those who had helped me blaze a path through all obstacles between myself - and Success.
Once it was agreed upon, I thanked them, and ended the ritual.
I reported in early in the morning, and could just about feel the air buzzing with spiritual activity, every bit of it by allies, friends and family both, of mine. When I would have time to wait (bureaucracy), I would meditate upon the image of the Six of Disks. I would envision its colours, symbols, and meaning, breathe them “into” my being, and then breathe “out” the influence of my Success into the world around me.
And my obstacles began to unravel as if on their own. Crucial documentation (bureaucracy) was misappropriated, important procedures were misapplied, proofs and evidences began to conflict, and on the human level everyone involved in “disciplining” me became instead singularly impressed by my calm and collected bearing standing out against the frantic fumbling of those who had been prepared to sit in judgment over me.
I can’t say a whole lot more about the actual details, as I hope you’ll understand. You should just know that I walk free, and having a great relationship with your ancestors and spiritual allies is an amazing thing. Oh, and the roast was fucking amazing.
Thanks for reading this far, if anyone does. I know it’s long, but there are some things involved in this tale that might be just what someone needs at some point - this forum has a way with doing that.
All Power and Discernment,
Claidheam