A Drunken Rant Against Conspiracy Theories

I’m not going to lie. I enjoy entertaining a good conspiracy theory. There’s something about spewing three second old, purely concocted nonsense to one of those dead coal eyed David Icke conspiracy babbling lunatics, and having it believed, that makes me chuckle to myself for at least a week. Every time I tell these fruit bars that I encountered a Reptilian while I was astral projecting/meeting George W. Bush/handing out literature on GMO’s/spiking redwoods in Spokane/on a spiritual journey to Jerusalem, you can actually watch as they physically steel their resolve. Not against the load of utter trash I’m funneling down their throat mind you, but that their Ultimate Enemy is indeed alive and well, and not some legend.

Why do I deliberately mislead already misled souls, you ask? I don’t know. I’m sure the Chuckle Factor plays a good part. I love trolling people; the more elaborate the prank, the better. I’m sure a lot of it has to do with the fact that gullibility, when stretched to the limit, snaps and transmutes into budding Bullshit Detectors. Take your pick as to which one you think it is.

The above being said, I have to draw the line when conspiracies that are just complete and total idiocy rear their heads. The New World Order dividing “the people” up by instigating hostility between Jews, Christians, Muslims and Buddhists? I got news for ya dude, Arabs and Jews have disliked each other for a long time, starting around the time the first nebulae began coalescing into the very first stars. A few posh old geezers in London, Berlin or D.C. aren’t just pushing people around like pawns on a Chessboard to make them hate each other.

I mean, Jesus Christ, do you even bother to read a history book? Did you happen to catch that part where a guy who married a Catholic declared war on all polytheistic religions (read: animism), then expanded his crusade to include all religions, once he was laughed out of a few shit hole villages? How about a few completely unimportant events during 1948, 1967, and 1972? Yeah, those didn’t happen during your lifetime, so they’re not important, am I right?

Now, if you DO want a conspiracy, one thing you can check out is the entire Christian religion. During the Roman occupation of what is now Israel, the Jews searched desperately for a Messiah to deliver them from the Romans. They searched for their Herakles, they searched for their Ares… They searched for their Warrior Messiah, who could, to quote Braveheart, “consume the Romans with fireballs from his eyes, and bolts of lightning from his arse.” The Romans, in a fantastic display of the single greatest instance of psychological warfare, gave them their Messiah… A peaceful one. One who told them to pay their taxes and turn the other cheek, because then the Kingdom of God would be in their midst. And, like any good propaganda campaign pushed by the State, the idiots believed it. (If you’re looking for sources here, too bad. Do your own damn research. All the information can be found here, provided you have an IQ above 100 www.google.com)

Now, depending on how you want to view it, this propaganda campaign was either marvelously successful, or ran rampantly out of control. Personally, I take the middle ground, that it was marvelously successful beyond its original scope, and so was expanded. With a rapidly spreading religion that encouraged submission (to Rome, interestingly!), control of the unwashed masses became much easier. Dissidents were steamrolled, opposing opinions silenced. In case you haven’t caught on yet, your evil “New World Order” is not opposing the Cross on the Hill beaming with white light all over the place. They’re different arms of the same exact monster. Yes, you read that correctly: CHRISTIANITY IS PART OF THE PROBLEM.

Now, to define “the problem.” Nepotism and shakedowns, basically. “The One With the Gold Makes the Rules.” They write the rules to favor their own, plain and simple. That’s all. The CEO of [corporation] does not routinely evoke [demon] and get his marching orders for how to more effectively control humanity (that’s what Madison Avenue is for!). Anyone who can tune in to energy will tell you that these posh geezers have as much juice as a dried up prune.

In closing, use your brain and some basic psychology before you start spewing bullshit about digging for viruses under the sphinx, or some other nonsense. Otherwise, someone like me is going to come along and tell you I was on that dig and everyone in the world is infected… and I’ll gladly sell you the antidote for all your life’s savings.

tl;dr Stop being an idiot and do your own research.

IQ of 135… I can relate.

“Ones intelligence is based on ones ability to question that which is. That which is , is far from from that what most perceive as truth. The love of truth is the love of the lie for truth does not exist. It is in constant movement and evolution as mankind should be. I am the light of truth as well as the darkness of the lie. These are one and the same Draconis. Look toward the symbols of the ancients and you will find that which is right now. That is far from the totality of reality. Reality is not real. It is a perspective which you have in order to relate with that which is outside of self. Just know that what is real is fake, and that which is fake may be real. You have no knowledge to gain here because knowledge is based on truth that does not exist. You simply experience that which is according to your own circumstance. Your circumstance is irrelevant to the rest of existence. The truth is in the lie.” - Lucifer