Your sexual energy is definitely overloaded, most likely as a result of the trauma you’ve mentioned. That’s normal. I felt the sex vibes off you the first time I saw one of your posts and it wasn’t even vaguely sexual in content.
Regarding your meditation, it sounds like you’re neglecting to ground. You need to ground yourself before any magickal/spiritual work, even before the protective white light bit.
In general, your energy is full-on bazonkers, shooting every which way. You would benefit from carrying a grounding stone with you as a general practice. I speak from experience on this one. I carry an apache tear with me and I wear an onyx ring when I leave the apartment and have to interact with other humans. =)
lol…I don’t want a random person. Okay…just ONE PERSON and a woman to play with occasionally but she ain’t staying in the picture…she is just come and go or swap out for another…but ONE MAN…MY MAN…and I am HIS WOMAN…and a lot of other times bring in a “play toy woman” y’know…
okay…that is like my ideal…then maybe I can rid myself of this sexual shit over load…
Can I get a reading for an IOU reading? I need someone more adept to tell me what is going on with my energies and such. I know this is not the name of the game but Im feeling compelled to at least ask.
to find a man…in the arts
who likes a bisexual redhead…who at times is crazy and an asshole
but wants to be made to submit…by a dark prince who is a DOM
and not an egotistical prick
who is romantic but edgy
aggressive but not abusive
and can handle a freak
Lol I think sitri can help (someone correct me) as well as you could probably crest a sigil, or make it as a list and burn it while saying “A partner who fits this description is brought to me. It is done” something like that