Lilith revelation during meditation

Spirits, Evocation & Possession
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Hello dear magickians, today I ask for your insight and wisdom, especially from those who are working with Lilith as I had an unusual experience that occurred last night.

From the beginning of my initiation in the occult I only worked with angels. At a certain point, they clearly let me know that in order to achieve success in some of my work (personal transformation mostly) I need to learn more fundamental material which involves solo work… Afterwards, I started to dig deeper into ‘‘step-by-step’’ initiation books, yoga, meditation and also discovering the history behind magick… So far, I can only state that this was a potent advice and I’m grateful.

Last evening, I went into deep meditation looking to achieve this oneness/wholeness feeling, without any specific objective… As I reached trance-like state I first heard my deceased grand-mother sending me information , saying that she misses me and briefly answering some questions I had for her, the ones regarding her reincarnation and her activities in the outer world… which she couldn’t properly answer stating that she did not know herself… Some time went by, total blankness returned in my mind, I knew that I was alone again just enjoying and dwelling deeper in trance.

In a very unexpected/surprising way I felt a huge energetic presence that identified itself as Lilith, claiming to want to work with me, bond with me… I cannot describe it in words but it was a totally different kind of energy that I felt while summoning various angels. I first refused her implication, maybe As I’m reluctant to work demons or to explore the unknown and encounter danger… I told her that as far as I know she’s the incarnation of sexuality while the aims of my current spiritual path is to abstain from all sexual matters as I’m an ex porn-addict and that I want to keep everything sexual off my spiritual work… That’s when she asked me to just try to ‘‘feel’’ her and see by myself what happens without any engagement/agreement, I agreed… And from that particular second I could feel a wave of power emanating through my root chakra, it was indeed an overwhelming feeling of power, the root chakra kept ‘‘vibrating’’ / ‘‘pulsing’’ for the rest of the evening, it’s very embarrassing, but I guess it’s worth mentioning that at this time I had an unexplained erection, it didn’t occurred from sexual thoughts or anything like this as my mind was free from that…it just happened on its own,like during a morning wood… Right after, I could now feel the presence of Raziel in the room offering to ‘‘supervise’’ and ‘‘constrain’’ the doings of Lilith, he wasn’t like… trying to chase her or to ban her but I felt more of a ‘‘supervision’’ to which I allowed as well, the root pulsation weakened and became a bit more ‘‘harmonious’’… After a little while, Lilith invited me to reach out for her and just disappeared without saying anything further, so did Raziel…

After quitting the meditative state it was around 9 pm, I felt HUGE fatigue out of nowhere… But my mind was filled with so many questions… First of all why Lilith, why Raziel ?.. I remembered a myth that I red long time ago, about Raziel providing Lilith with Knowledge through a book that he gave her after she was banned by Yahweh from ‘‘heaven’’, may this explain his intervention ?..

As I went to sleep, I had a VERY long, realistic and disturbing dream, can be called a nightmare. If I start detailing it would take some time to read so I’ll just try to point out some essential points :

  • It first started with the funeral of my grandmom, in which I left slightly open her casket and couldn’t properly bury her without help… I knew that this was bad and went to search for help

  • I searched for various days for help but couldn’t find anyone willing to help me, I knew that as long as the casket remained not buried the situation will get worse

  • I met a work colleague, that I truly like IRL , she’s 8 years older than me, has a long time BF and recently got pregnant from him which prevented me to think about seducing her… But I still found her ultra attractive through her mentality/energy and physical looks… The moment I met her in my dream I started to make out with her…

  • At the end of the dream I meet my angry grandmother standing in the middle of my room causing havoc, because I couldn’t bury her casket…

That’s pretty much it… A disturbing experience in my calm mundane everyday life to say the least… I was indeed drawn towards Lilith, the first ever occult book that I completely finished was ‘‘Lieber Lilith : a gnostic grimoire’’ by Donald Tyson. To be honest it was just for the ‘‘theory’’ and more for a ‘‘thrill’’ than a material that I would magickaly practice like the books that I own from GoM… I did ended up by being shacked by the content in that book, the gnostic look of genesis especially (as I was christian at the time) but also the concept of Lilith, in which the author didn’t miss to underline the dangers that it might involve… Ironically, my belief today is aligned with gnostic philosophy but I still don’t dare to work with Lilith, well not until yesterday evening.

Sorry for the long read ! Any comments, views are highly appreciated :smiley:

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Wow, that was quite the read.
I need to make some disclaimers before responding: Im a noob, so take this reply as you may.
I feel its hard to respond without it looking like trying to push you into a certain direction, so I will try to just state my experiences.
And lastly: again, Im a noob. Which means I honestly cant tell whether my interactions have been with Lilith or my own mind. I do think those were genuine connections but I think its fair to point that out when replying to something which seems it could be very important to you.

So, anyway. In my experience the unpleasant or dangerous aspects of Lilith exist to teach and help us understand. Kinda a cliché thing to say but its true as far as Im concerned. To me it seems like she uses appaling visions to get us back on track with our true self.
Also, in my experience, she doesnt turn you into a sex fiend. For me, I came to an incredibly more healthy view on sexuality and masturbation through Lilith. Ive also been a porn addict since around the age of 14 and only managed to quit that with her help. I actually wrote a lengthy journal entry about just how that happened a few days ago: Chris' Journal - #6 by Chriss
I could write more but I think the most throughout and accurate description of Liliths personality that my noob ass can give is already in that journal entry.

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Thank you for your input, I’ll make sure to read your whole journal as it resonates with my case here. Me too I did not felt that she’s here for ‘‘sexual’’ matters , while she doesn’t deny being involved with them in my regard she’s willing to show another ‘‘face’’ of her being, so this is interesting!

Edit : @Chriss So I just finished reading the 6th entry that you linked me, got to say that if you feel that fap is bad it must ONLY be through self experimentation and self gnosis… I’ve been very involved with this matter myself, being desperate to know why was I so low ‘‘energetically’’ which translates to : having no willpower to pursue ambitions, poor social interactions, too much anxiety, no organization, no concentration, not enjoying life in general… well you name it, only negative aspects… Then I gave a try on nofap and could feel the shift of my personality, wellbeing and everything I just mentioned just getting better, so IMO I’m convinced through personal experience that it does harms one aura and drains your energy. While energy is actually EVERYTHING in our world , well imo. At some point, even diplomas/degrees are not that impactful in your professional life as your energy, your enthusiasm, self confidence and awareness… So as looks are just secondary in seduction, your charisma, storytelling skills, behavior, attitude will play a bigger part to drive a beautiful coveted women into you… This was later confirmed to me when I dived into the RHP philosophy.

Of course just like you I looked upon the occult to also find a solution to this issue which in my case is : maintain semen retention and avoidance of all porn content. Results were mitigated while working solely with angels but I encountered great results as I started to meditate and perform rituals for personal empowerment, now the hardest part is to keep doing on a very regular basis.

Now if Lilith manifested into our lives, perhaps she has the answer

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I am intimately familiar with all the negative aspects you listed here. But what I tried to highlight with the journal entry was that this seems to have shifted once I stopped seeing masturbation as a bad thing that I did out of lack of willpower and started seeing it as a natural part of me. I feel like after I made this change I not only got rid of the negatives but in fact gained a lot of positives from it. For example I feel more whole. The lack of drive I used to experience after masturbating also went away and it now happens regularly that I get up after doing the deed and feel motivated to do stuff.
I was and still am very hesitant to comment on this because I feel like it could influence you in a direction and while I have experienced a lot of positivity from changing my views on that it might not apply universally to everyone. It may or it may not.
I also consider the possibility that MAYBE its just one step of the journey and I dont rule out the possibility of engaging in no fap again, just at this point in time it seems to bring more benefits to me to fap.

I also believe the analysis you made here to be true: namely that personal energy dictates a big part of interactions and such.
One thing I should point out is that in all I said I dont mindlessly engage in fap and I think this part is very important. At most I watch 1 porn a month, I strife to view fapping as an exploration of myself, as a way to be more myself. Balance is really important. While I personally am in favor of fap I think its a good strength building exercise to only do it when the urge is really there and to not use it as a distraction from problems.
Im not perfect in this matter and have room to improve there. But yea I felt it was important to note that even if one is on the indulging side of things its still valuable to build strength and will power while indulging.

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NoFap philosophy brings a good solution to a problem but it is still very flawed. The whole concept of abstinence and labelling yourself as an addict is counterintuitive and for many people makes them spiral even further down the rabbit hole.

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Well… Lilith changed my life and I wholeheartedly love her for it. She came to me in my despair and reforged me.

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No worries it won’t influence me but it’s still very beneficial to hear that some people can actually not feel totally wasted after practicing this act… and emptying their semen. Same goes for me, when I share my thoughts about it, it’s just to rely my own personal experience I had and of course not meant to impose my point of view to anyone.

Are there any topics where I could find more details about your story ?

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I might have written that experience a couple of years back on this forum. Ofcourse I don’t remember what it is called sadly. I have more than a few instances where I have written about Lilith since she is a venerated matron for me. She has really been looking out for me and have never asked me to do something in return.

Actually tho, yesterday night I was meditating for myself when out of the blue I felt the need to have Lilith presence with me. The room started getting icy cold and my vision went dark blood red with shadows started manifesting around me, I was then thrown into a deep passionate trance for a solid 5 min before it stopped. Everything screamed it was Lilith doing. Now I am just trying to figure out what this was and what impact it’ll have for me, really puzzling. Overall the experience was really pleasant and wild.

Edit: The deep passionate trance was nothing sexualised. It just felt like raw uncut passion.

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Do you mind sharing about how you used to be before having Lilith as matron and what have you became now?

I seen your topic about ‘‘semen retention’’ did you get any help for that objective ?

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In few words. Heartbroken.

The store is long and complex so I’ll summarise it more.
I had an ex (first love) that went behind my back and took the carousel around town. She brought my self-esteem down without me releasing it before it was too late and I went down the MGTOW route. Really having major trust issues with womankind and getting more and more indoctrinated into the thought process of the MGTOW philosophy.

Then one day I got a pack of shrooms from my friend and decided that I wanted to have some fun. So I pooped that into my mouth and an hour latter Lilith came before me and comforted me and made me experience my break-up in more vivid details over and over again. She made sure I cried as a newborn baby who wanted it’s mommy.

After that session I felt whole and renewed again. My mistrust of woman was replaced with gratitude and trust instead, all the baggage was just lifted off my shoulders.

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Wow you in Chriss actually met Lilith while under substance, I’m looking forward to experience that too but getting hands on something like DMT is pretty hard where I’m living… So did it helped you to get over with your issues towards women in long term ?

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The shrooms I got was something that was natively grown in this part of Denmark I live. My friend just handed me a sealed package one day and I went home to try it for the lols.

And long terms? For sure! My outlook is completely different now. I have a much more deep and impactful experience with woman now. Everything is fluid and I am just more naturally flirtatious with them. It’s exciting.

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Seems like Helix here has successfully united the Lilith fan club :grin:

Thats reassuring to hear. I was very cautious because people on both sides of this argument seem to be very touchy about it (no pun).

I think its REALLY interesting that we both had beneficial things happen to us despite going the complete opposite direction. I guess this goes to show how important following ones individual path is.

A while back I grew my own shrooms and dabbled in extracting psychedelic components from plants. Iirc extracting DMT from phalaris grass (that stuff basically grows anywhere) wasnt too hard. Feel free to PM me im case something like that is of interest to you, I could google around for you or check if I still have some old notes about the process.

Thats really bold to talk about something like that so publicly. Ive had a similar experience and while I havent worked through it fully, Im getting there.
I wanted to say ‘thank you’ for posting that because it actually inspired me to take a closer look at a similar scenario in my life that happened a while back. So yea, thank you :slight_smile:

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