Hello everyone, I’ve decided that the time has come for me to begin writing my own journal on here as I find that this would be the best way to record my journey and key factors for future references. I’ve been on this journey now for nearly 5 years and while my abilities have admittedly staggered a little bit from time to time. I’ve had quite a journey so far. Furthermore; one of the reasons being of wanting me to start this journal is that something big is about to happen. My life is about to change for the better, courtesy of several spirits that I’ve worked with; Asmodeus, Astaroth, and Lilith just to name a few. I’ll be updating my journal from time to time on the same topic here and not adding new chapters by creating new topics as I’ve seen several others do. So, lets get into this shall we?
First, a little backstory of myself and I’ll spare the religious details since it’s pretty much the same song and dance for just like mainly most of us on here. To make a long story short, (“too late,”(A Clue reference)), born and raised in a Christianity family and left it. I honestly had a tough child hood growing up. I was teased, bullied, and picked on as a kid. I was seen as an easy target and a lot of it was due to the fact that I was a geek. I grew up watching a lot of 90’s shows such as Power Rangers, Batman, DBZ, Sailor Moon, etc. I really had no place that I felt like I belonged. Now, that changed a lot in my later days in high school but I still felt like an outcast from time to time. I also had no interest in magic as a kid, although I do have family that has dabbled in Wiccan but I won’t mention who. Growing up though, I was always the goody two shoes kid. I tried to play by the rules and believing that if you follow these rules everything will work out in the end and you’ll rise to the top. Bullshit! Absolute bullshit! Yeah sure, if you wanna remain a slave for the rest of your life and not get anywhere then by all means do that but you’ll never get anywhere. I realized that in order to get ahead in life, you can’t play by the rules. You have to be willing to break them and do whatever it takes to get to the top.
My journey into magic began back in 2013 when I had a spiritual awakening. I was on my laptop and decided to browse the internet looking for stories about the succubus. Lo and behold I ended up coming across some journals on wordpress. They were about these individuals who claimed to be in relationships with actual succubi, but I rubbed it off at first thinking that they were just a hoax. However; my curiosity got the better of me as I not only continued to read the one that I came across but found out that there were several journal entries out there and my curiosity tuned into astoundment as I started questioning things about the way I was raised and the religion that I was raised in. However, it wasn’t until I went to bed that everything began to change for me. I went to bed, (in the nude of course as I have done so for a while now), and laid down. As I did, I began to feel something. Starting at the end of my toes and slowly but surely began to make its way up my body. It stopped at my waist and didn’t move then. My instinct told me that it was because of my clock. My clock that I had then contained a bright light that lit up the room completely. I decided to turn my clock off and set my alarm on my phone. I then laid back down and the process started again. This time, it didn’t stop at my waist but went all the way up to my crown. Afterwards, I felt myself bathing in what felt like a pool of energy. It didn’t feel sexual or anything but I felt peaceful and at ease. After staying for a few minutes it faded and I found myself falling asleep calmly.
When I woke up I began to start questioning and asking myself. “Could everything that I had been told was one big fat lie? Have I been deceived? What was that I felt last night?” I started doing some research but didn’t know where to start. That next night I felt something different. I didn’t feel the energy like I did the previous night but instead. After I lay down in the darkness. I could feel this very vivid hand touch and rub my face. I was astounded to what I was feeling. I still haven’t thoroughly found out yet if it was Lilith, one of her daughters, or another entity. What I did start finding out though was that every morning when I came home from work. When I lay in my bed naked and not thinking anything sexual. I would get an erection and could feel energy around me. I also started having lucid dreams of a female figure. At times she would take on different forms one of which being a mermaid.
Anyway, it was around that time also that I discovered BALG and E.A. Koetting. This became my introduction into magic. While I didn’t actually start practicing. I did start getting a little bit into meditaiton and researching, and after finally getting out on my own for the first time. I started diving into it and in Fall of 2016. I called on Asenath Mason to initiate me into Lilith’s current, and that’s where it all began. More to come soon.