First make sure you aren’t cursed:
Say
3x In Gods name I clear myself of all curses and ask to be filled with God’s healing love.
3x Thank you.
(the healing love part is just to make you feel better and give you a new base strength)
You sound pretty down, so make sure you clear your area of any negative energies or beings. Burn sage
cling the bell
say 3x In Gods name I forbid any negative beings to be in this space (or close to me).
3x Thank you.
say 3x I send away all negative energies (first from me, then from this space) and replace with positive light healing energies.
3x Thank you.
Then to get a better life there are a ton of spells and beings to work with. I am nuts about S Rob’s books at the moment. Check out “Lilith’s naughty life path magick” to remove negative stuff from your life path and add positive. But really all of his books contains stuff to improve your life.
Lastly, start using positive affirmations daily. Will put you in a positive spiral upwards instead. Can really change things.
Good luck.