I don’t think your thoughts mean anything. I don’t understand why some people think every random thought is significant.
You have a thing for Lucifer. Okay.
What is happening, in my opinion, is that you are approaching Lucifer from a religious perspective, like he is the god that is going to solve all of your problems, but another part of you is rejecting that idea.That’s all. It’s pretty common with humans. We want want something, while simultaneously not wanting it as well.
Also @Noel616, I see you have not yet introduced yourself, so I suggest you go to the NEW MAGICIAN AND INTRODUCTIONS area and do so, as it is a rule of this forum and not optional.