Also, hit the gym and learn martial arts, and see how fast you will gain confidence.
Dont.Dont do that.You are no special.Neither they are tho.Whats wrong with being different.Own it, my friend.
Talk to a psychologist about this, please.I am not saying you are insane, insane people get put into asylym, not to an office of a psychiatrist.It can have an uplifting effect on your life.
Listen, I will tell you the bare truth.You are not worth it until you put up the work.You will put up the work, you will call the being you wanted, and you will kick ass.
However, its always good to start small.A petition there, a jar over here, a banishing over there… Etc.
I can try to help you personally, but you might be thinking now I am putting on a trap, so, start with this: