I only just began really working with demons I had a good experience with Claunk and decided try Belial
Since I’ve started working with him last few months I’ve found myself become way more aggressive and somewhat more belligerent verse the more layed back and easy going person I used be and was wondering if any one else has experience something similar
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Had anything else happened between contacting King Belial and now? Like, anything noteworthy that has set you off?
Well basicly have a lot personal drama and kinda always let my father brow beat me and just rather be his controlling and dominating Christian self he won custody of my kids in a three way custody battle between my soon to be ex wife and her new fiance she was not the biological mother just filed under parental locos
That about month ago Been kinda at end of my rope so speak alone pretty much faceing the nonstop defensive battle verry battered so speak I was feeling somewhat broken but never been so petty evil and controlling I’ve been bold before but not this in your face fuck you type of aggression thing is not angry or in a rage not like that at all
That’s awful. I’m so sorry to hear that.
But I think those sorts of situations can make anyone feel/act like that. I mean, that shit’s rough to go through.
Not just that I’ve black mail people including a church been member of the last three years since I’ve started this path last Nov I really have no more morals before I’ve always had a Christian core values even when practicing pagan now been doing lot of dark stuff and I’m fine with it but im becoming verry aggressive like i calmly and matter of factly told my father all nasty things I’ve been doing and pretty much told him how he ruined my life and he apolageized lol
Things been getting way better I walk out my job week later makeing 4 more an hour
But i don’t feel like myself thou not one to walk out in not one to,sneer in soneone face nor be so cruel almost heartless and dispassionate
I’ve felt the same working with him
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I keep my working with Beilial In its own journal with rituals I have wrote
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Yes, I can vouch for that. For me, it sometimes feels like a ball of rage lodged in my gut. But it isn’t mine and I have no reason to be enraged. It doesn’t take me over since I can compartmentalize it and use it as I choose.
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Not to claim to be an expert or one who has experience with Belial, but what I picture when I think of him is the hyper masculine alpha male type. Someone who is aggressive and gets what he wants. Belial is associated with Earth energy, but not the generous giving sort we associate with “the goddess”. More so the “Survival of the fittest” Darwinism type energy, the jungle predator. I like to symbolize Belial with a manticore, representing both majesty and force. This isn’t to say his energy is necessarily bad, but if not balanced it can be. He represents the sort of person who seems to have it all, money, sex, power, fame, because he has the power to take it.
I’d suggest using Lucifer to balance Belial. Where as Belial is all about power and force, Lucifer, I believe, is about wisdom in how to use that power, especially constructively.
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Well been really doing well my heath has improved instead of being wipe out and walking into defeat I with Belial at my side has ether won or gotten a stalemate
Even custody papers when they came was not a win win for my father who trying block all contact with me and my kids to save them preserve our Christian heritage
I am supposed to have peorids of partial custody not just visiton so going be a lot easyer getting my kids back which is my end goal that and getting us our own house just me and my boys
Guess sound bit selfish in fact I’ll burn and destroy everything and everyone in my way to make this happpen
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Sometimes Belial’s alpha male energy is necessary. It helps to turn a push over into a warrior. I’m not sure how wanting custody of your kids is selfish. Nature is about survival of the fittest, and power does win battles. The weak are plotted out and the strong (relative term) conquer. One has to take care of one’s self and one’s own. I think that’s Belial’s way of thinking.
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Just thinking on things and rereading some post and perhaps I think and ponder way to much lol
It’s only been since Nov I started back into Magic and this first time I have work with demons so much has changed mostly within me
Used try be moral and basicly right handed path type white lighter believe that everything work out for greater good
Now pretty much amoral been trying hold down collateral damage to people not directly involved in the battle I’m going thru but had a fuck it let the world burn moment after a bunch of harassment by my soon be ex and her new fiancee
All the Facebook stalking and harnessing friends to get payback on me this week has caused me to retaliate normally just ignor all petty stuff and all it is is petty stuff and my destruction I bring serves no purpose other than show how dark and cruel I can be
Like I told people involved you wanted your God to dam me and wanted me broken and cast into darkness knaw on bones of bitterness be subservient to you all they done make me be monster they said I was lol
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