So Im not sure what category to put this in cause at this point im accepting almost any form of magick to help me,
This is a long one, let me start with some background, I’v been a witch for about 4 years now or almost 4 so still pretty new to the game and constantly learning new things and i love it because i come from a strict christian family.
Soooo, I’ve never cursed or hexed anyone never thought i would ever actually even think about going through with anything like it because i still had some christian beliefs for awhile.
However, this situation has made me want to expand my options.
Im constantly picking up on my “ex’s” energy we recently cut communication once again with each other, well it wasnt mutual i sent him a goodbye good luck message and unfriended him on Snapchat.
He is a public figure and i feel as though he puts more energy into me when we’re not in communication which actually now thinking about it, is kind of true cause he has made several songs about me and just recently AN ENTIRE ALBUM. His music is trash hes not good at all but thats besides the point.
He recently got flown out to finish filming for a show so hes living his best life and im actually happy for him I wish he can live his best life without being so attached to me (sending me telepathic messages/energies) but whatever.
I started thinking about before i cut ties with him (cut ties with him a little after the 4th of july) how he gave me basically a rundown on how the network works, i have a feeling they’re gonna try to use me in his storyline because they really like him and think he could be a fan favorite in the future or something like that.
Remember i said he has several songs about me and now an entire album? I’ve come to realize something he said when we first started talking again he said that basically the network wants him working on his music while we were all in quarantine, they’re gonna try to promote that on the show or something idk but not good cause just the title of the album is very telling of who i am.
I’ve been waking up at around 2-3 am alot lately with a sick feeling and overall just not good or positive emotions towards him.
Sometimes he’ll randomly pop up in my mind when im doing something distracting or random and my spirit just gets heated up and angry.
We didnt necessarily leave off on bad terms because in my message i just told him hey i cant do this you’ll never change this doesnt feel right yada yada good luck to you.
However, we both pick up on each others energies and are able to send messages telepathically and i know for a fact he knows im upset with him. Because just a couple weeks prior to me breaking it off i had got frustrated with him over some colorist things he said and called him out, its 2020 im TIRED.
And then he had made several posts on his instagram story that exhibited his colorist behavior once again and I got PISSED so thats what led me to breaking it off all of a sudden.
He doesnt know my instagram (i keep it hidden from him for a reason) I used another account to basically spy on him when we were in communication cause I always catch his BS antics on there to encourage myself to stop talking to him. I was literally looking for a reason to stop talking to him again cause I couldn’t figure out why i wanted to talk to him so bad again in the first place. So ya, that day came to fruition, and I kind of went on a rant on snapchat just basically going off about colorists more in particularly colorist men on a general basis of how its just tiring.
I had already unfriended him by then but my sc story is public whether we’re friends or not so he still saw what i posted after deleting him before he eventually deleted me back after seeing my goodbye message, and what i was posting on my story about colorists.
My thing is if you have that way of thinking… like technically, im not even his type/preference from the bull he was posting on his insta story so im confused as to why hes so infatuated with me and why he cant get over me in the first place.
Thats kind of besides the point though.
Im mad because im still picking up on his energy and i feel like im the only one bothered, im the only one hurt, im the only one suffering while he gets to do whatever he wants, this happens time and time again, Its my fault for trying to reconcile with a dude who has now disrespected me several times i’ll take that L but what im not about to do is let him continue to run his mouth (what i feel like hes doing) and also potentially “get clout” (hate using that term) and make a profit off a women he claims hes deeply in love with but has no respect for, he likes to be around me because good things happen for him and alot of times I would help him get money with magick though i didnt do it the last time we reconciled.
I feel like if i dont do something i can easily get dragged into what I call “hollywoods mess” and i refuse. Before i broke it off with him he kept asking me to take a picture with him for his instagram and my gut just kept telling me “no dont do it” and i didnt know why until now, everytime we were together he wanted me to take a picture with him and i thought it was a bit weird because he was being so pushy about it. He would say stuff to imply that if i take the picture with him how well it would do for his line of work basically.
I dont want my name to be attached to his, because as soon as he gets a chance he will drag me into “hollywoods mess”.
There are too many models and influencers that dont kind of dont have their own name or their own brand because the drama they had with their ex and it being in the public eye had people forever attaching them to that situation.
This man will F around and end up doing that to me if he gets a hold of my platform while being on that show, i can feel it, my spirit guides have been giving me signs and warnings that make me feel this way. I thought i was crazy for thinking this way, but i know him, and I know his morals and the ignorant things he will do for fame and money i’ve seen it first hand its cringey.
So i feel like i need to do some sort of preventative work to keep that from happening?? But while also sending him the message to leave me alone im not the one to be messed with.
Too be honest, i kind of want to scare him, i left out alot of details and some context cause this would just be wayyy too long then it already is, but hes done other fucked up things to me and i told him im actually traumatized from one situation in the past that caused our relationship to end.
I’ve forgiven him for alot of stuff hes said and done but i wont forget.
He’s really not that great of a person and i’ve tried to ignore the energy, ignore him, move on, but i cant when we’re still so connected.
I still have love for him but it’s beginning to fade cause hes just so disgusting as a person. I cant go as far to say evil but hes definitely a runner up. So if anyone has any advice on what i should look into doing its greatly appreciated.
P.S. i tried to get rid of his energy so many times before throughout the last couple of years, i’ve tried bath rituals, banishing and healing spells, practicing the LOA, tried cutting the emotional cord (maybe i didnt do it right tho??) and also asking my angels and spirit guides for help but nothing seems to work…