One of those “stranger then fiction” things as they say. A couple of years ago I was one of those “learning from the bookstore” fledgling web and software developers trying to get my foot in the door straight out of tech boot camps and in need of experience. After a while of getting a few short term, less then a years worth contract here and there gigs. I was in need of getting something longer term to put on my resume to be taken seriously.
So I did what I did best, roled up my selves and started doing some prosperity magic in the night and interviewing and practice interviews and the like during the day. After a few months of nothing sticking and everything from mantras to candle magic, and starting to get tired of the seemingly wrote response of “just hang in there and keep calm and carry on” from my Right Hand Constituents. I decided to try something different.
I was starting to dip into the Left Hand path ever so much by then, and had gotten a weird message or two of the Supernatural variety, so I said Screw it, and asked Lucifer for help. And thus I did a ritual.
(Here comes the punchline)
I worked and worked well, under a week in fact. But the thing was I got a job in the IT department of one of those “MegaChurches”. Yes the ones where you “sow your financial seed” and maybe one day your debt magically disappears, and the preacher has his own private jet, for “delivering the kingdom word to people of course”.
Of course by this stage in life I have a few Judeo-Christon shaped chips on my shoulder, and the irony of the situation doesn’t escape me. And when the head preacher guy rants stuff about “how the kingdom will take over the earth”, “taking the ‘strongman’s’ stuff”, and “sneaking into the ‘enemies’ camp” I mentally face palm myself with how absurd the setup all is.
But if nothing else I am a professional and work hard enough to do a good job, have work experience under my belt now, and actual benefits for the first time in a long time. My friends have no end of LoLz over it. I channel Lucifer at least once a week over lunch break as a way of thanks.
C’est la vie.