Notes and Conclusion after experiencing this time and time again
When one finds themselves truly out of body, there is a strong pull that leads back to your physical self. Much like a magnetic attraction. Remaining conscious of yourself in this state is easy, it is being able to control yourself fluidly that is the problem.
With my past experiences I have found myself crawling on the ground using much might to break free of my pull to experience my new environment and my other state of being without restraint.
This connection between your etheric body to your physical being is where the energy comes from that originally sustains you, this is why it is so hard to break it. When in this state of being it is not your mind that takes control, it is your subconscious mind. Your conscious mind states intent and your subconscious mind acts accordingly- much like that in the physical realm. You feel thirst, you desire a drink. You consciously go to the fridge, grab a drink and quench your thirst. The difference I find is that when comparing that scene playing out in the etheric realm- that was too much thinking.
In the etheric, you consciously would desire a drink. Your body will go out and find one without listening to your reasoning that there should be a drink in the fridge nearby. Your body will more than likely leave the premises and find its’ own way of getting a drink.
The intent I had when I endured my vampiric experience was to remain out of my physical body. Therefore my subconscious mind did what it took to sustain my etheric body once I broke free of my pull, giving the results I desired in the first place. It was when I consciously questioned what my subconscious was doing, thinking of the morals of the act that had taken place, is when I was kicked from my journey. Reflecting on that part of the experience led me to a discovery.
When I was an etheric being, I feel now that I was some kind of creature. A creature who just acted out of impulse, my civilized, conscious mind seemingly on the side lines of what was happening, trying to guide the situation from afar. Much like being in a taxi. One decides the destination, but it is not in their control how they get there.
As I stated before, my intent was to stay out of body, which was communicated to my etheric being, but what I did not think of is how could an etheric being sustain itself after breaking free of my personal energy? My subconscious self already knew how. It was to take energy from any nearby source. I didn’t consciously know anyone was next door, but my other self did, and it knew what it needed to do to fulfill my intent. I watched what I took part in and after it happened, the questioning of the act to my personal morals flooded my mind and conscious thought eventually took over- kicking me out.
Much like Freud's theories of the id, ego and superego, I feel that the creature I had become was an embodiment of the id. The impulse-ridden, survival and pleasure-hungry basis of all behavior. My conscious thought being the distant echo of ego, the reasoning of one's actions and process of fulfilling the impulses and desires emanating from the id. Then the superego, the thinking of morals, right and wrong of actions to take or actions done, being the process of thought that took over me at the end of my journey.
I discovered that I could not use all of my conscious thought while in the etheric realm. Using it will only lead to a shortened journey. That there is no room for morals or overpowering thought processes in the etheric realm. Therefore, I needed to focus on reconditioning my processes of thought, so that I would feel confident enough to essentially "coach" my subconscious, but not enough to smother it. I needed to trust that my subconscious will execute my intent, and not question if it got the message or question what it was doing.
After much reflection of my experience and conclusions, I saw that my etheric being was a wild creature and I was its' master, but, like with all captive wild creatures, you have to understand that it is its' own being and it will do what it does naturally. You cannot beat it down to bend to your will. This will desecrate the true nature of the beast. It will become weak and a one trick show pony.
With this experience and understanding, I've experimented with meditations and created the one found in the AoS and others that I use to this day. Utilizing these meditations and practices I eventually found myself able to withstand being out of my body for periods of time I had once thought impossible. I have been able to physically experience things I once thought was out of my reach. The manner of which I gather energy has expanded to many different ways, but I have found the best way to gather etheric-sustaining energy is through the means of directly stealing the life force from others. I could discuss the morality of this, but does a lion feel bad for eating a baby zebra? This is all about vampiric magick after all.
In order for those down the vampiric path to experience the true potential of the vampiric current is to connect with the inner beast and essentially become a creature of the night themselves.
The thought of what happens to us when our physical bodies perish has been a question that has lasted throughout all the ages of man. It has guided us to develop moral and social codes of conduct, it has empowered us to live our lives to the fullest with the time we have left, it has even made men fall by their own hands. When discussing the nature of death and knowing that each and every one of us will one day meet our life's end can fill a person with many emotions. It can cause self-reflection on the life they are living and if they need a change in path, it can cause sadness, or maybe even happiness for the pessimistic.
It is believed that when our bodies die, our soul carries on into the after life. It is usually believed among the populace that our souls are then shuffled and funneled into our final destinations. It is also said that our souls are to return to this world, or with enough spiritual enlightenment gained in one's life, become a god-like being.
We are all just energetic beings trapped in flesh. Once the flesh is gone, we are free. It now becomes a question of what to do with that freedom. There are many accounts of survivors who have encountered near-death. It's usually a tunnel of light, a visitation of their life, a pleasurable inviting feeling of letting go. These people usually end up having the underlying factor that during their experience they end up out of their body at some point. With this in mind, it would be logical to conclude that becoming proficient and comfortable with your ethric body will be of the utmost beneficial for one who wishes to become immortal.
On the topic of second death, it is believed that the mind and spirit are internally bound by the flesh. Upon the expiration of the flesh, the mind and spirit are released of their connection and are ejected into the astral plane, now separated. While in the astral plane, a choice presents itself: go to the spiritually-enticing "light" or reject the light and follow the mind to the etheric plane. Those who find the inner drive or purpose of their life centering around fulfillment of spiritual or mind will determine how one will make the presented choice during the stay in the astral plane.
If one was to ultimately choose the light, the mind will dissolve and the spirit will be recycled and regurgitated back into the cycle of existence. It is this process that a majority of people fall into, continuously having their spirit reincarnated for eons.
This calls into explanation the subject of old souls, those souls who have metaphorically "played the game of life" long enough to know how the game works, and are wanting a different ending, but have no mind for the understandings of such thoughts and feelings- which draws them to the teachings of such things like the occult. It is understandable for those who want the light - it is a beautiful and warm light where, no matter the belief one had in life, one will feel it to lead to a good place. It would appear that this is a safer route than delving into the other choice, where one has no knowledge or understanding of what it would entail.
While those who reject the light and follow the mind to the etheric realm will have their spirit dissolve, and exist as an etherc being, gaining unprecedented knowledge and experiences of their choosing. It is until their physical body is completely consumed and recycled into the earth will their mindful essence end up with the same fate. This is where all the discoveries of the vampiric path have led me.
Utilizing these practices and the teachings of Naamah, I have found that the vampiric path not only has the potential to help those with a strong will, and with enough courage, help a person escape the pull of the light and delve into the anti-world, but to also be able to sustain their etheric being long after their physical bodies have deteriorated back into the soil.