I have sent my application to the Temple of Set.
I think I missed the first part. Is this a good thing? What are your motivations for doing so?
Basically growth and personal evolution; to be able to conquer personal demons and rise above my current state.
In that case, I stand by my previous statement. Awesome!
Why do you feel this is better achieved through a group setting?
I’ve been a solitary practitioner all my life. I’ve collected lots of info, but had not been as successful as I wanted when it comes to applying. I attached an essay on demons and demonology as proof of what I’ve learned. So far, I’ve been more of an arm chair occultist, or as I put it, an occult academic.
I’ve always wanted to work with others. Though, through the years, its always been that other practitioners are out of reach. The few who are tend to be the judgmental “white light” sorts or the elitist “sex, drugs, and rock’n roll” types. When I say “sex, drugs, and rock’n roll” types, I mean people who just want to party, drink, and have tons of sex, with the occult as a secondary interest. For me, I am passionate in the occult, but only wanna indulge myself as a secondary thing.
As a solitary practitioner, who struggles with depression and anxiety, I don’t feel spiritually inspired. In fact, it often feels like I’m reading about games like Magic, the gathering, Warhammer, and Dnd. I’ve even took my research and built my own game around it. I’m very proud of my hobbies and projects, but there’s always this “It’s only a fantasy” idea in the back of the mind. Books may give you the information, but they can’t provide the emotional support. I’m also worried about being wrong. I’m worried that this is all just a fantasy. And if it isn’t, will I conjure something I can’t control?
Ideally, there’d be some sort of university you can enroll in to do this. Magick is one of the oldest things in human history. There’s enough on the subject to at least fill a community college. If not that, then there’s plenty of avenues.
I want to study and work with others so I can find that inspiration I’m looking for, persevere through the depression and anxiety, and realize I am not just living in a fantasy.
I don’t think I’m in an abnormal position.
I can relate. Use to be where I wouldn’t leave the house without tons of anti-depressants and anti-anxiety meds to take the edge off. Had to slowly figure out what my core issues were and started operating under my own power.
I was solitary until around this time last year. Half of it was because I didn’t see the value of other people. Other half was because, to me, groups mean rules. I break the fuck out of rules. It can be as simple as “Should not attempted by beginners”
“Is that a fucking challenge mate?!”
I know what you mean. I stay in, I’m miserable. I go out, I’m anxious and can’t enjoy myself.
Fantasy is real life+imagination, use imagination to solve real life in a creative way and live the fantasy. Roll a character with high charisma and larp 24/7. That’s how I got over the anxiety anyway.
The Temple of Set is a worthwhile organization. However, it is also my personal belief and experience that any closed organization (versus a more open one, like the Order of the Ascending Flame) is good for one’s ascension only to a certain degree, after which one should break away. Ascension is a lonely, solitary affair, and necessarily so. I strongly believe we can learn from group, but woe to us if we think we need it for ascension.
Just my two cents.
At this point, “Ascension” is not my concern. I prefer not to focus on such vague and esoteric goals. Ascension is relative. At the moment, I want to better my skills and knowledge in magick, along side my confidence. Once I’m at a point where I’m confidant, skilled, experienced, and know what I’m doing, I’ll decide to focus on “Ascension”.
I have more local NJ groups to learn from, but they’re more white light Wicca.
Which is good because you won’t find that in the Temple of Set. Though for some insight into what ascent looks like, read Ipsissimus.