Turning Poison Into Medicine?

I know I’ve been scarce in commenting lately, because I’ve really been occupied in everyday life but also because my spare time has been heavily invested in pursuing the vampiric current of Tezcatlipoca that I mentioned here much earlier. His teachings had a very ‘shamanic’ emphasis in their “shapeshifting astral vampirism” theme, and recently I’ve also been guided to finally begin working with Hekate to further broaden my skill set here. I first wanted to work heavily with her when I was a total neophyte in magick and got to look through Mark Alan Smith’s grimoire featuring her. In a particularly “heavy” dream at that time, I was visited by that current’s embodiment of the Moirai. They told me some very neat things about personal development and ‘destiny’ that have since either proven true or been corroborated by others’ independent divinations (I’m looking at you in particular, Lady Eva!) - and then told me quite straightforwardly that my time to work with Hekate had not yet come, but it would if I followed the path revealed. So after this horrendously long paragraph of introduction, I’ve recently felt that it’s become time! This little anecdote that may be interesting/helpful occurred barely a few days after reaching out to better ‘introduce myself’ to Hekate before, hopefully, agreeing to work more closely together. Up to this point my techniques in astral vampirism taught in the vein of Tezcatlipoca focussed on my solo efforts, played out as a hunt. Reaching out to Hekate triggered the experience of working with other entities. I’ll be sure and close with why I think this is, after I get on with it and type the damned story. So cheers!

My guidance from Tezcatlipoca was always heavy in emphasizing the physical element as one more thing to bring into harmony with the mental/spiritual, for a stronger combined effort. Certain degrees of physical training and exercise cultivated more of the body/mindset of the hunting animals that proved as role models in the hunt, as well as rendering me good and physically tired for a better astral jaunt.

The night that this new development occurred, I had just completed a little night run and some other exercises to the point of pleasant physical exhaustion. After which, as an exercise of mental might, I laid down comfortably but held off going to sleep, meditating instead. Once I was finished with this and ready to go to sleep for the next stage, my (finally awakening!) senses picked up on an unknown entity entering my space and bearing toward me.

The entity was at first a shapeless mass of dark colours, with mostly black and purple wings like a butterfly’s: in fact the pattern of the wings was closest to perhaps a luna moth’s. I instantly sensed that it was female, and it was vampiric: in fact it had come to leech off of my hard-won extra energy! I remained still and calm, confident in my abilities but waiting to learn more about the entity.

As she drew closer, a head began to develop from the shapeless mass of swirling dark colours. It resembled a bird’s skull, with large socket eyes and a needle-sharp beak. As she drew closer, she went for my lower chakras and then developed a body: female, nude, but not so much actually attractive as just sexual (if that makes any damned sense!) - and also very clearly not her true form but an assumed mask in order to pilfer energy. She was about to vampirize some of my sexual energy, when I finally moved, just a little to show that I had been aware the whole time.

With my breaths to lend emphasis, I tweaked the “darkness-breathing” from WoD that I still practice often, and called to Darkness as my tool. This time, I formed the Darkness into tendrils, which I used to hold this vampiric entity in place. She tried to struggle at first but my concentration was honed by good training and there she remained. So she started changing her shape, form after form, trying to appear more attractive, more irresistable, or even like a helpless girl who “just needed to eat”.

When her struggling had subsided, I told her that I had nothing against what she was doing, but was not about to let it happen to me: after all, what did I have to gain from it other than that loss of energy? She knew she was caught, so had to listen. I told her of something that might benefit us both: we would combine our strengths, hunt together, and share the spoils. She could show me her techniques in deception to lull victims into submission, and I would lend the strength of a hunting animal when it was time to actually overpower. I didn’t have to seek out mutual gain: I felt confident that I could bottle her up somewhere practically forever.

She knew she was caught, and she agreed, but muttered that I would have to see her “lord”. I got the feeling that she wasn’t a hugely powerful daemon so much as a minor spiritual entity, so this really intrigued me. I dropped fully into a deep trance, instructing her to “show the way.”

When I had transitioned to this other place (I’m never sure when my use of common occult terminology will actually be at odds with the common usage, so I try to to commit to, ‘oh, it was (x) plane or dimension, of course!’), I was in front of a small grassy knoll or mound covered with very pale green, almost greyish, turf. I had the impression of many more of these winged entities flying to and fro far overhead. Atop the tiny hill was a solitary grey stone tower, very old, with an unnaturally blackened archway instead of a door, through which emerged a strange figure. He definitely gave off the impression of a being of real power, nothing minor like the creature that had tried to feed on me.

He was tall, moved with measured precision that in spite of slowness implied strength, and had very pale greyish-green skin much like the grass that was growing on the little hill. His eyes had slitted pupils like a snake’s, or maybe a cat’s. His short hair was white, but his face unwrinkled: he was ancient, no doubt, but unaged according to our human standards. His canines were very pronounced, and he wore a brilliant green coat of emerald hue, like some Renaissance coat of ridiculous complication. I’d try to image search for something similar but I have no idea what such a thing would be called.

He already knew what had brought me there, but showed no surprise. His greeting was courteous but lacked warmth: in short, he dealt with assigning his “charge” to me as if it were a business deal, but he really seemed to attach no importance to the outcome. He just watched me with those slitted eyes, very intently, while I explained that for the trouble of this vampiric nuisance I felt the need for either some type of recompense, or I would feel obligated to retain my captive. He without hesitation told to me that the captive was mine, and seemed relieved that I had asked for nothing more, which really picqued my interest about who this was. So far a lot of the elements reminded me of some of the original faery stories from the Celtic countries, but as soon as I saw him the name of a major daemon leapt unbidden into my mind for no “reason” I can discern, and I’m hesitant to simply dismiss that. Of course, it could be a defence ploy on his part, but I’m getting ahead of myself.

With this talk seeming concluded, and a lot of questions running through my mind, I departed with my captive-turned-servitor. The scene of the tower on the mound began to fade as we departed for my usual hunting-grounds, but the figure of the faery or daemon or whatever he was remained outside the tower, never breaking from silently watching me.

The entity that had at first tried to feed on me became very quiet at this point, and I took us to go find some sleepers (my working theory is that the people I’m able to feed on right now are somewhere actually asleep, but how the hell am I supposed to know right now - at least the results are great). I communicated to her that she was to draw them out and entice them, and I would lunge for the “kill” (I’m just going to assume those quotation marks are justified; if not, that planet’s grossly overpopulated anyway, but I think “killing” them in their sleep just wakes them up, with a bit of their vital or sexual energy still floating around to be harnessed). This worked well: I had freed her from her bonds of the Darkness and she seemed disinclined to really go anywhere, so she did her part in the hunt and without any prompting on my part stood back to give me the first share of the harvested energy. (For all you lovely civilized people on here, just remember that courtesy is for ladies and gentlemen: she felt quite up to the task of feeding on me, so I have to be ruthless enough for her to respect me, and this is definitely a necessary measure of ‘pack dynamics’ if that doesn’t sound too pretentious.)

Then I shared some with her, and I really do think that the kind of energy I can hunt successfully through Tezcatlipoca’s methods still provides more than her techniques could have provided, to say nothing of what arrangement there may have been with the Green-coated Man. It is my intention to continue hunting with my new servant and hopefully win a real loyalty from her, so I can learn more about this Green-coated Man. He has secrets!

I have trusted her in the meantime to hunt on her own some nights, as long as she brings me a token share of what she gathers, and she has been consistent in returning so we’ll see where this goes.

I would say that overall, Tezcatlipoca’s path has been about cultivating yourself as a solitary hunter, self-sufficient and powerful. This series of events, occurring right after reaching out to Hekate in inquiry on a future dedicated pathworking together, has already involved more working with other entities, and even managing a servitor (and I get the feeling this fellow in the green coat has many different entities under his authority). Or, I wasn’t “supposed” to do this and I’m a colossal Mesoamerican-savage-trained asshole.

Ok, I think that’s all I meant to type out about this just now. I hope to be more consistently active here in the near future, so I hope y’all are prepared for more utter lunacy! 0.o

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[quote=“Claidheam, post:1, topic:6501”]I know I’ve been scarce in commenting lately, because I’ve really been occupied in everyday life but also because my spare time has been heavily invested in pursuing the vampiric current of Tezcatlipoca that I mentioned here much earlier. His teachings had a very ‘shamanic’ emphasis in their “shapeshifting astral vampirism” theme, and recently I’ve also been guided to finally begin working with Hekate to further broaden my skill set here. I first wanted to work heavily with her when I was a total neophyte in magick and got to look through Mark Alan Smith’s grimoire featuring her. In a particularly “heavy” dream at that time, I was visited by that current’s embodiment of the Moirai. They told me some very neat things about personal development and ‘destiny’ that have since either proven true or been corroborated by others’ independent divinations (I’m looking at you in particular, Lady Eva!) - and then told me quite straightforwardly that my time to work with Hekate had not yet come, but it would if I followed the path revealed. So after this horrendously long paragraph of introduction, I’ve recently felt that it’s become time! This little anecdote that may be interesting/helpful occurred barely a few days after reaching out to better ‘introduce myself’ to Hekate before, hopefully, agreeing to work more closely together. Up to this point my techniques in astral vampirism taught in the vein of Tezcatlipoca focussed on my solo efforts, played out as a hunt. Reaching out to Hekate triggered the experience of working with other entities. I’ll be sure and close with why I think this is, after I get on with it and type the damned story. So cheers!

My guidance from Tezcatlipoca was always heavy in emphasizing the physical element as one more thing to bring into harmony with the mental/spiritual, for a stronger combined effort. Certain degrees of physical training and exercise cultivated more of the body/mindset of the hunting animals that proved as role models in the hunt, as well as rendering me good and physically tired for a better astral jaunt.

The night that this new development occurred, I had just completed a little night run and some other exercises to the point of pleasant physical exhaustion. After which, as an exercise of mental might, I laid down comfortably but held off going to sleep, meditating instead. Once I was finished with this and ready to go to sleep for the next stage, my (finally awakening!) senses picked up on an unknown entity entering my space and bearing toward me.

The entity was at first a shapeless mass of dark colours, with mostly black and purple wings like a butterfly’s: in fact the pattern of the wings was closest to perhaps a luna moth’s. I instantly sensed that it was female, and it was vampiric: in fact it had come to leech off of my hard-won extra energy! I remained still and calm, confident in my abilities but waiting to learn more about the entity.

As she drew closer, a head began to develop from the shapeless mass of swirling dark colours. It resembled a bird’s skull, with large socket eyes and a needle-sharp beak. As she drew closer, she went for my lower chakras and then developed a body: female, nude, but not so much actually attractive as just sexual (if that makes any damned sense!) - and also very clearly not her true form but an assumed mask in order to pilfer energy. She was about to vampirize some of my sexual energy, when I finally moved, just a little to show that I had been aware the whole time.

With my breaths to lend emphasis, I tweaked the “darkness-breathing” from WoD that I still practice often, and called to Darkness as my tool. This time, I formed the Darkness into tendrils, which I used to hold this vampiric entity in place. She tried to struggle at first but my concentration was honed by good training and there she remained. So she started changing her shape, form after form, trying to appear more attractive, more irresistable, or even like a helpless girl who “just needed to eat”.

When her struggling had subsided, I told her that I had nothing against what she was doing, but was not about to let it happen to me: after all, what did I have to gain from it other than that loss of energy? She knew she was caught, so had to listen. I told her of something that might benefit us both: we would combine our strengths, hunt together, and share the spoils. She could show me her techniques in deception to lull victims into submission, and I would lend the strength of a hunting animal when it was time to actually overpower. I didn’t have to seek out mutual gain: I felt confident that I could bottle her up somewhere practically forever.

She knew she was caught, and she agreed, but muttered that I would have to see her “lord”. I got the feeling that she wasn’t a hugely powerful daemon so much as a minor spiritual entity, so this really intrigued me. I dropped fully into a deep trance, instructing her to “show the way.”

When I had transitioned to this other place (I’m never sure when my use of common occult terminology will actually be at odds with the common usage, so I try to to commit to, ‘oh, it was (x) plane or dimension, of course!’), I was in front of a small grassy knoll or mound covered with very pale green, almost greyish, turf. I had the impression of many more of these winged entities flying to and fro far overhead. Atop the tiny hill was a solitary grey stone tower, very old, with an unnaturally blackened archway instead of a door, through which emerged a strange figure. He definitely gave off the impression of a being of real power, nothing minor like the creature that had tried to feed on me.

He was tall, moved with measured precision that in spite of slowness implied strength, and had very pale greyish-green skin much like the grass that was growing on the little hill. His eyes had slitted pupils like a snake’s, or maybe a cat’s. His short hair was white, but his face unwrinkled: he was ancient, no doubt, but unaged according to our human standards. His canines were very pronounced, and he wore a brilliant green coat of emerald hue, like some Renaissance coat of ridiculous complication. I’d try to image search for something similar but I have no idea what such a thing would be called.

He already knew what had brought me there, but showed no surprise. His greeting was courteous but lacked warmth: in short, he dealt with assigning his “charge” to me as if it were a business deal, but he really seemed to attach no importance to the outcome. He just watched me with those slitted eyes, very intently, while I explained that for the trouble of this vampiric nuisance I felt the need for either some type of recompense, or I would feel obligated to retain my captive. He without hesitation told to me that the captive was mine, and seemed relieved that I had asked for nothing more, which really picqued my interest about who this was. So far a lot of the elements reminded me of some of the original faery stories from the Celtic countries, but as soon as I saw him the name of a major daemon leapt unbidden into my mind for no “reason” I can discern, and I’m hesitant to simply dismiss that. Of course, it could be a defence ploy on his part, but I’m getting ahead of myself.

With this talk seeming concluded, and a lot of questions running through my mind, I departed with my captive-turned-servitor. The scene of the tower on the mound began to fade as we departed for my usual hunting-grounds, but the figure of the faery or daemon or whatever he was remained outside the tower, never breaking from silently watching me.

The entity that had at first tried to feed on me became very quiet at this point, and I took us to go find some sleepers (my working theory is that the people I’m able to feed on right now are somewhere actually asleep, but how the hell am I supposed to know right now - at least the results are great). I communicated to her that she was to draw them out and entice them, and I would lunge for the “kill” (I’m just going to assume those quotation marks are justified; if not, that planet’s grossly overpopulated anyway, but I think “killing” them in their sleep just wakes them up, with a bit of their vital or sexual energy still floating around to be harnessed). This worked well: I had freed her from her bonds of the Darkness and she seemed disinclined to really go anywhere, so she did her part in the hunt and without any prompting on my part stood back to give me the first share of the harvested energy. (For all you lovely civilized people on here, just remember that courtesy is for ladies and gentlemen: she felt quite up to the task of feeding on me, so I have to be ruthless enough for her to respect me, and this is definitely a necessary measure of ‘pack dynamics’ if that doesn’t sound too pretentious.)

Then I shared some with her, and I really do think that the kind of energy I can hunt successfully through Tezcatlipoca’s methods still provides more than her techniques could have provided, to say nothing of what arrangement there may have been with the Green-coated Man. It is my intention to continue hunting with my new servant and hopefully win a real loyalty from her, so I can learn more about this Green-coated Man. He has secrets!

I have trusted her in the meantime to hunt on her own some nights, as long as she brings me a token share of what she gathers, and she has been consistent in returning so we’ll see where this goes.

I would say that overall, Tezcatlipoca’s path has been about cultivating yourself as a solitary hunter, self-sufficient and powerful. This series of events, occurring right after reaching out to Hekate in inquiry on a future dedicated pathworking together, has already involved more working with other entities, and even managing a servitor (and I get the feeling this fellow in the green coat has many different entities under his authority). Or, I wasn’t “supposed” to do this and I’m a colossal Mesoamerican-savage-trained asshole.

Ok, I think that’s all I meant to type out about this just now. I hope to be more consistently active here in the near future, so I hope y’all are prepared for more utter lunacy! 0.o[/quote]

First of all,this is awesome.Second of all,welcome back!Now,on the topic of Hecate.

You know,when working with any entity,there’s a strong period of attraction,in subjective synthesis.It’s like you’re in love,this entity is all you research,all you think about,all you try to talk to.But,there isn’t that sense of agape for me,it’s more like very strong philos-related admiration.Hecate is the first entity who ever took touched my heart in a more affectionate manner than simply a friend.She wasn’t my lover,she was my mother.Our relationship doesn’t have an element of agape,or eros,but storge.

The time and place was last year,in August,in Kuşadası,Turkey.I had gone there,on vacation,and at that point I had been rising to serious power.Hecate was an entity I had encountered,as a figure in Greek mythology,and the Triple Goddess in Wicca,but never as anything else.

I contacted her,and did a sort of baptism ritual in Zeus’s cave in Izmir,and made contact with this goddess.I had been talking to her on-and-off throughout the year,as she is a guardian spirit of mine.

At some point,I started asking her to help me with stuff and always said:‘‘Thank you my goddess.’’ at which point she insisted,that I call her mom.In fact,she wouldn’t talk to me if I referred to her as my goddess,but insisted that I refer to her as my mom.

Now,the nature of the ritual I did in Turkey was a sort of consecration to the forces of magic,that through it I could consecrate each cell in my body to the forces of magic.As I did this I became a creature of magic,and a child of Hekate.So in the end,I’m claiming to be made of magic and the child of an ancient crossroads goddess because of it.

But Hekate also happens to be the mother to all the dark fay out there,and that’s the first thought I had when i saw the winged being in your vision.I know you’re probably not very inclined to work with fairies(military man and all),but I’m still pointing this out because it’s odd that two pathworkings I’m doing(fay magic,and black magic) just ‘‘happen’’ to align through my Mother.

It’s in this cave.

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I know you're probably not very inclined to work with fairies(military man and all)...
Nonsense! I worked extensively with the Navy, and it's full of fairies!

On a more serious note, I’ll bet that working with Hekate in old Anatolia can be very powerful. Many researchers believe that early on, the Hellenes adopted Hekate from the Hittite/Lydian/Luwian/Carian inhabitants of the region, much like Apollon and Aphrodite, who Homeros depicted as fighting on the side of their favoured Ilion/Troia (or Hittite Wilusa/Trusa). The land’s Hittite connexions in particular fascinate me because their myths and language form a significant bridge between the native Hattic culture (likely heirs of the Anatolian Neolithic sites), the hugely significant and influential Sumerian culture (whence came their cuneiform writing, and many linguistic and mythic/cultural motifs), and the emerging Indo-European culture (an interesting comparison because at the same time their Avestan counterparts were busy settling in as ritual ‘purists’; history shows that the cosmopolitan Hittites were scattered during the Late Bronze Age upheaval, and the purist Avestan Aryans ossified into megalomaniacal religion and decided the Vedic Aryans were heretics, then ended up lending philosophical fuel to two millennia of monotheistic madness - surely a different setup is called for?). That land is ancient, and holds many keys of power, I’d venture!

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[quote=“Claidheam, post:4, topic:6501”]

I know you’re probably not very inclined to work with fairies(military man and all)…
Nonsense! I worked extensively with the Navy, and it’s full of fairies!

On a more serious note, I’ll bet that working with Hekate in old Anatolia can be very powerful. Many researchers believe that early on, the Hellenes adopted Hekate from the Hittite/Lydian/Luwian/Carian inhabitants of the region, much like Apollon and Aphrodite, who Homeros depicted as fighting on the side of their favoured Ilion/Troia (or Hittite Wilusa/Trusa). The land’s Hittite connexions in particular fascinate me because their myths and language form a significant bridge between the native Hattic culture (likely heirs of the Anatolian Neolithic sites), the hugely significant and influential Sumerian culture (whence came their cuneiform writing, and many linguistic and mythic/cultural motifs), and the emerging Indo-European culture (an interesting comparison because at the same time their Avestan counterparts were busy settling in as ritual ‘purists’; history shows that the cosmopolitan Hittites were scattered during the Late Bronze Age upheaval, and the purist Avestan Aryans ossified into megalomaniacal religion and decided the Vedic Aryans were heretics, then ended up lending philosophical fuel to two millennia of monotheistic madness - surely a different setup is called for?). That land is ancient, and holds many keys of power, I’d venture![/quote]

That’s interesting,because I had made the assumption that Hecate came somewhere from Northern Europe or something(hence why the Wiccans try to label ehr as their Triple Goddess) and wouldn’t have thought of looking at her as a Hittite entity.

Then again,I’ve never really asked Mother where she was from,it just didn’t seem important.