Thoughts on Synchronicities - Reading Events like Tarot

I’m wondering what people’s thoughts and experiences are with synchronic events. I’ve had a thick string of 'em recently and would be grateful for some spiritual food for thought <3 Heads up, it’s a juicy, but traumatic string of events involving graphic DV/SV details so reader discretion is ADVISED!

Context: ended an intense, abusive, karmic, romantic relationship 6 months ago, with a very sadistic, dishonest, vampiric person. He really got off on controlling my safety but selling it as sexy and ritualistic, which, truth be told, was very my thing. But trust erodes and fear comes in, things fell to shite, he held on for a bit then ghosted. I learned he had a whole history he hid from me, as well as a lurking ex that knew all about me, his manipulation of me, how abusive the relationship was while under completely false pretenses, and had nothing to say when I sent her a polite, “I think we’ve been dating the same person and he did XYZ, just thought you should know.” So she’s quite complicit.

All that being said, I’ve had 0 contact with either party since July after finding out about everything, minus some sus burner accounts looking at my Instagram, but the psychic connection to my ex has still felt strong, and not in a “heart eyes” way. It feels nonconsensual if that makes sense. It’s been a long and intentional process healing from relationship’s abuse and learning to process the karmic lesson, being that I see through this person’s dishonesty to retract my absolutely golden love and stop romanticizing the martyr role (Pisces Rising LMAO) At first, that nonconsensual, psychic feeling was obviously the pain of heartbreak. But, as a sad girl with trauma enters somatic therapy, delves into Tarot divination, folk magick, and ceremonial magick, she gains reason about who the ex was, how to utilize her lesson, and moves on with knowing they’re not good for me. Heartbreak ceded, and I’ve been able to tackle the real scar: the fear he left in me, this terrified, animalistic, survival energy rooted in my nerves. AND HERE is where the problem comes in; after a recent series of random but seemingly connected events, I’m led to believe that he is doing some sort of magickal something to stop me.

So, these events: In the past 2 months, I’ve had some serious moments of personal power, holistic breakthroughs, acceleration forward, the first two being sexual. One was healing and gentle, one was absolute debauchery. Immediately following the gentle experience that helped me heal a lot of fear, I was hanging out with my lover, calm and peaceful, and suddenly felt this sore pain on the side of my nose, where said ex used to hit me, but nothing directly caused it. My nose even swelled and turned red, and nothing like a nose pimple ever came of it, so I supposed, “Oh, my ex is mad I’m healing from him.” It stayed for several days.

A month later, I engage in debauchery, which I anticipated to trigger me but actually went very well. I felt great and empowered, and then the next day, I randomly get a text from a friend: a picture of my ex on a date with a young girl I’ve never seen. I got really pissed. At first, heartbreak echoed, but then I was like THIS GUY SUCKS and that ceded. After some meditation, I realized it was about wanting this girl to not go through what I did, and moreover, not let him get away with it again. It got a rise out of me, but as far as seeing the event as a message or sign, I wasn’t convinced yet. I wasn’t convinced it was me receiving his spite like my sore nose after having a healing moment. Either way, I knew I wanted to focus on strengthening myself even more, so I craft a protection spell. Now, this spell is specifically crafted for sexual safety, involving a black skull candle (gorgeous) and a prayer to my Angels and Beast. I lit the candle every night for 5 nights and recited the prayer, then would sleep with it lit.

On Day 3, as the spell gained more power, the flame started popping. Day 4, more and more, in increasingly violent crackles as I tried to sleep, which I interpreted as, “I’m receiving a message, or I’m running into a spell that’s trying to interfere with what this one is doing.” So, I listen and receive images of a red umbrella → red umbrella becomes a red door in a dark hallway → hallway door opens and a shadow figure exits, coming toward me. I hear to “Get them out!” and “Lock the doors!” SO I gather my Angelica and sprinkle it in the four corners of my home, then burn it in my hearth. I lock the doors. I put on my Garnet cross. I pray, I pray. I sleep next to this popping flame feeling thoroughly protected, my spell written on a piece of paper under my pillow. I burn the candle down on day 5, c’est fini.

The week continues, and I land an opportunity of finding my ex’s car while out and about, which I took to spit upon it 3 times, my favorite form of cutting. I go on with my day, go to a movie with friends that night, and attend a local bar afterwards, where I FUCKING RUN INTO THE COMPLICIT LURKING EX OF MY EX. She WORKS THERE? And I just look at her, in this perfectly loud skirt embellished with mirrors, bells, and shells (literally), and I go outside, and I come back in, and she’s vanished. So I was stirred but got over it within the night.

And now, at this point, I’m convinced these events are synchronous. I feel quite certain he’s doing something magickal, consciously or unconsciously, to interfere with my growth, given that my moments of power are followed by random, external encounters, thus reminders of him. But I would love to hear other people’s experiences with this type of phenomenon! Because it could be anything, and I aim to avoid my blindspots like the plague. Thanks!!


The only power he gets is the power you give him. Don’t be a moron in the physical world, and if you feel the need to get law enforcement involved for a restraining order or some such thing then that is not something you should be afraid of doing, but in terms of magick, the only power you give him is the only power he will have.

Such an unfortunate event, when the enemy gains the ability to exist.

And about the nose thing, I have had very severe physical manifestations occur in others after repeated probably daily visualizations (toxically obsessive fantasies) of a certain event being played out over and over and over and over again with various variations, none of them really sensible, but the payoff moment was always the same. Why would I run and hide when I am most definitely faster, stronger, more accustomed to operating in environments while under direct attack, and overall more combat effective?

But then again, it is truly, truly an unfortunate event, when the enemy possesses the ability to exist.

At the very least, you can rest assured in the knowledge that even if something terrible were to happen, I have seen the demons curse others with nothing more than a passing moment of hate, just cause they knew I’d appreciate it and really it was nothing for them. MADness, just like the good ole days.


I see, thank you!

I definitely understand the part of “giving him power,” but I don’t find myself to be doing that anymore. I’ve removed all romantic illusions about him, alongside any power I believed he USED to have over me, and the nose thing was the first big indicator. I don’t see my swollen nose as a result of fantasies piling on top of each other, but rather the physical manifestation of the aftermath of fighting PTSD he gave me. So there was no running and hiding, but perhaps the first real moment of fighting back and winning.

As I’ve gone on enacting my Will to remove him from me, it’s like random events show up to remind me he’s still clinging. It’s like a game of tug of war manifested into a buzzing fly that won’t leave you alone, but I’ve been winning, and I suppose I just want him to quit and give up and stop struggling. Which goes back to your point, “it is truly an unfortunate event when the enemy possesses the ability to exist.” And my current experience of his existence is not so much the issue of his lasting power, but more the issue of him trying to regain it over me as I’ve severed the cords of his trauma.

That being said, there has been little interaction in the physical world, outside of safe events that look like mere chance. If he or anyone connected to him sees me, they bolt. If he stalks me, I don’t know it. There’s no evidence I have to get a restraining order, nor do I think one’s necessary. And even if I did, the city I live in now is notoriously neglectful in prosecuting DV or SV (like a 13% annual prosecution rate) so I have no faith in the legal system to protect me from abusive men, in true witch fashion lol. But nonetheless, he’s the one hiding from me, which makes these physical events of chance so confusing. Why am I having exposure to someone that tried to remain buried, you know?

My friends tell me the same thing as you at first, being that he holds power I give to him, a great piece of truth. But I’ve been removing it from him and returning it to myself, taking all the “right” steps in healing from an abusive relationship. Playing “smart,” if you will, and everyone says, “That’s great! You’re moving forward!” And I agree, but then my question lies in, “Why does it feel like he, or Chaos, is immediately countering each step forward with an event that could set me off?” And everyone says, “Yeah, that’s weird…” So that’s where I am. Certain in my power over him, in my power in general, but not certain if there are attacks against me in regaining it. And given he’s an absolute scoundrel and I hate him dearly, I would like to stomp out any indication of such on sight, engage in some bloodsport, and go home happy with a vial of his entrails. And maybe that’s where I’m going wrong; too eager to fight, like a bull and a matador. Or maybe I’m just dealing with the unfortunate event of an enemy trying to will his existence into my life as I slowly but surely cut it out. And I would like to stomp his will out.

PTSD sucks, I can agree with that. This will probably take a while to deal with.

If he is the one avoiding you, though, then that sounds pretty much like mission accomplished. Sounds like you have struck fear into him. This is good.

With him gone and out of your life, you can effectively begin to unravel any traces of him left in your mind. Realize that toxic people can influence you more than you may immediately realize. There is probably fear that remains which was there before him but that he capitalized on. You have to get in there and dig it all up, which is not usually a fun and dandy fuckin time, but you have to dig it up to get it the fuck out.

I do not have to spend my time creating these violent fantasies any more because I no longer feel such intense hatred. Even if they are already gone and not in your life, if you keep feeding the illusion of them that exists within your mind, your hatred will not go away even as you destroy them again and again. If that is what you have in your mind, though, I think it is a good and healthy idea to relieve yourself of this in a cathartic release.

Be aware that malice so often begets malice. If you want peace, do what you have to do, and make your final act involving this person one which causes them to fade from all corners of your mind. That’s what you want to do to the things which you hate, right? Make them all go away. Shhhh, shhhh, it’s ok, it’s ok. Put your head back, close your eyes, and wade into the quiet of the stream.

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Beautiful thoughts, very well said. Thank you for your insight!