So its going to be BLOGGED and POSTED.
The path of Teth connects not only Chesed’s archetypical laws with Geburah’s carrying them out, but also the main Pillars of Mercy and Severity. Therefore it is a path of particularly strong and fruitful polarity, a highly sexual path between love and will as such, of fluent manifestation. If successful, this intercourse fuels the soul’s journey into form with a loving determination that enables it to accept, control and transform the earthly forces of nature. These are symbolized by the lion (Leo!) on the tarot trump below, controlled by a woman, Eve, a key actor behind our venture into self-consciousness, our Lust for life.
-PEH - WORD, THE TOWER, THE PHILOSOPHICAL FAVOR IN HOD BEGOTTEN FAVOR OF SEBEK’S PRIMORDIAL FORCE BALANCED WITH NETZACH - When emotional stability is achieved, and by the purification of my own Word which seems lately to be a councilling from a higher source for others as well as an aegis that repels with lightening (literally each and every time a few seconds of contemplation is given to jupiter, etc, when I draw something esoteric, when I create a poem, or post a facebook status, I have this feeling that A LOT OF THE PEOPLE WHO WERE THREATENING, HARASSING, ATTEMPTING TO HUNT DOWN, SCHEME, AND PLOT AGAINST ME, have failed from the start, have seen a VERY WRATHFUL storm in their life, have seen that same very wrathful storm in their life IN NATURE, and are probably going insane. Sebek’s wisdom will be added below. A girl posted something like ‘the Storm is Sexy’ reflecting newfound confidence in my own mind, body, spirit, etc, and all of these have added up. Today, a person (junkie with reason to scheme and plot for money or bribery, who was going around robbing people and stealing, who probably had some kind of plot set up to FUCK ME OVER began to show every psychological sign of traitory (after the night of a dream of seeing alligators swimming gently under the surface of the nearby neighborhood which for the longest time seems almost an erected shrine giving signs of the current state of life). I run home when the alligators scare me off, and run up a hill,struggling against the steepness but still reach the Top. (Bizarre says, “ON TOP OF DA MOUNTAIN, AIN’T NUTTIN YO BITCH ASS CREW CAN DO” and therein is the unstoppable, divine providence of the EMPEROR!) . After I told him “No I don’t want to go hang out with you.” he still asked “whats your address and phone number?” and I knew than he was playing stupid little ‘I’m dumb’ games (he probably had his ‘friend who is driving’ tell him what to say- he really is utterly stupid). And at the final refusal, he raged and yelled in his error-fertile facebook malice how “I’m not going to have friends, I’m an asshole and talk a lot of shit etc” even though seconds prior the conversation was normal (until I challenged his truthfulness). A dream of alligators swimming after a google search indicated ‘indicates thieves, liars, and distrustful people’.
Before the attainment of the things Said and Done by the Great Work, I was utterly saturnine, even between the stages of calcination and conjunction which are less scornful by God’s Word than the rotting death of fermentation, when death spreads like a plague to my life and others (people were dying not necessarily in my circle, but at the heightened stages of my Black Magickal practice people would start to die as a MESSAGE that my TARGET’s hex worked, but not to the extent that the target died. I’ve driven people mad, I’ve caused decay of relationships and partnerships and all thats good, etc. I’ve chased madness in symbols and omens in daily life and found Gold and Philosophy therein as Its Stone.
- DALETH -door- - BY THE FORCE (CHOKMAH TO BINAH) WHICH IS ILLUMINATING THE TRUE WORD- SHARING - LILITH, WIFE OF SET, ETC, BLUEbell, bee’s (honey?) - The door has taken the form of a lust after women my WHOLE LIFE, and the central problem to my most dysfunctional depression was the desire for a woman, a self conscious lonelyness that seemed to DEVOUR (sebek) from the Inside. As a boy I had a dream of an Alligator devouring me, my helpless small form swallowed by Empty Jaws. Lately is a recurring theme of a mighty and magick young child who was jokingly percieved as a super hero at one point. (looking back to the picture of Hitler lined up with the Marvel Heroes in a school studen-made painting in Tibet some time ago, JUST HOW FAR have my thoughts been effective???).
I haven’t hexed anybody, but they destroyed themselves. The primordial pool is everywhere and its mirror reflects. ciricumstances by nature have allowed for A LOT OF RUMOROUS CONFUSION of where I live, allowing for nobody to find me and start trouble, allowing for time for THEM TO GET SEVERELY DEVOURED BY JAWS OF SEBEK.
This post is basically typed in a maddened excitement by the discovery, I want a legitimate qaballist to observe the ‘three pronged ladder’ (MEM has a significant force here, it represents not only the sacrifice for that raw black sorcerous hatred, but also the fact that BY SUSPENSION BETWEEN KNOWING AND NOT KNOWING, WANTING BUT NOT DESIRING, ACTION AND STILLNESS, a HUGE key to my big life problems has been discovered, and so even the act of reading is magick. the act of drawing is magick. the act of becoming and breathing and changing and regenerating and living IS ALL MAGICK!
Three the Empress’s number, and the final culmination of the Form of my life is apparent in its Nature.
But I’m still a stupid fucking kid, right?
Right now it would seem my path has been on the constructed form of that of the divine lightening bolt under the assumption I would be the one to slither up the serpentine way. Literally everything at its culmination has been explained by whats happened since the very beginning of SIXTH AND SEVENTH grade. And the answer is found between the 6th and 7th stage of Alchemy =]
Looking at the motion of the ‘start’ of my occult path, the Moon might as well have been my Wiccan entry into Yesod as Magick, but I think ultimately the real struggles of the path began with a walk up the pillar of severity from Malkuth to hod due to the focus of Evocation and Black Magick, being Critical of the world (the vice of the path), and this was such a young age to begin evocation with zero skills- its no wonder that the ‘beginning of calcination’ came was initiated by a ritual to Gaap, whose name I just came back to at the end of the cycle. Childhood had a dream of a devouring reptile, and so Hod was clearly the entryway into the maw of that dragon which was going to bring me through that dense underworld that covered the whole tree of life. The worm gnawed and squirmed, but the dirt was very hard, blockages needed to be cleared, plans needed to fall apart as constant Paradigm Shifts, etc. After a VERY LONG 5 years of suffering, of the showing up constantly of the number 23, after facing and embracing every fear and every abomination on the path, after madness, after obliteration and ressurection, I came out of the Tail of that oroboric crocodile as fermented but purified.
THE CURRENT THOUGHTS: The tree took a circular root imbalanced on severity, descended down the middle pillar at the emergence of the solar light and the union with its moon, and now another upward movement is to go up (or down? this is why I’m posting- so you all knowing, illuminated individuals can tell me Which Way is Witch). I KNOW that because of those begotten troubles of the lightening bolt path, I may actually have a choice as to picking either ascent or descent. In that case I would pick the slower and methodical approach to the ascent by the Serpent because I embraced everything even if I’m -fucking sick of ONE THIRD of it. I think that last night I ‘grasped the mystery’ finally as the entire nature of the tree of life in regards to ME suddenly crashed down as if the ‘viel was rent’. Yet never called myself a qaballist (but started with its QBR/LBRP/MPR) until this. Kether is back to Malkuth, and the tree is going to repeat itself- the question remains, WHICH WAY?