As part of some of my schoolwork,I have had to read the Epic of Gilgamesh.The Epic of Gilgamesh,for those who do not know(albeit,I doubt there are many of those here) was a text,written in cuneiform on clay tablets,in Sumeria nearly 4000 years ago,and an epic poetry form(as were many ancient works).
It chronicles the tale of a man,Gilgamesh,born two-thirds a god and one third a man.For those of us familiar with how human reproduction works,this is super-confusing because we assume all demigods are human/god offsprings.
However,upon further reading,this,to me,implies that he was born a demigod(and more specifically,to a mortal father and goddess mother),however,that after becoming king,he demanded the people worship him,thus making him two thirds god and one third mortal.
My sight was also caught with how in the very first tablet,he is described to have incredible wisdom of hidden things,which to me is certainly a more fanciful way of saying that he was a magician.
It wasn’t uncommon for epic heroes to practice magic,in these Pagan societies.Odysseus summons his dead comrades through a ritual.Egill invented the Nidstang,despite being a warrior and poet.Beowolf wielded a blade that married Norse runes with Christian blessings(something that IMO shows on its own that Pagans were nicer always nicer to Abrahamists than the other way around)
Today I watched(or rather,started watching,I have yet to finish it) EA’s evocation of the ancient Sumerian underworld god(if I try to say his name I’m afraid I might misspell it),and in his introduction,he explains,among other things,how these ancient civilizations that wrote epic poetry,did so under divine inspiration.
They didn’t just take events and blow them way out of proportions,they made them allegories for our lives,as many a literature teacher will preach,but if such allegories can be applied in our mundane lives,then why shouldn’t it be applied in our magical lives?
Gilgamesh,despite being described as strong and beautiful,and epic and blah blah blah,is kind of a jerk.He forces men,weak and strong,young and old,to work for him,and takes credit for building a wall,that his citizens built for him,and he sleeps with women,on their wedding nights!
He openly scorns Ishtar,and instead of simply saying that he’s not interested because he’s unsure of whether she’ll be faithful to him,or being smart,noticing that this is a goddess of PASSION,and simply saying he’s not interested,this ‘‘hero’’ openly calls her a slut,and claims to hate her.And she curses him.Twice!
So,did the events in the Epic of Gilgamesh,happen?
Even if they didn’t,this was still an ancient civilization,with a language that is embedded with magic,magic that the very cells in our body are programmed to recognize,writing a story,that’s littered in occult symbolism,as the very Bible we all blatantly offend on these boards,too,is littered with occult symbolism,that can benefit our practices.
EA Koetting’s evocation is wonderful.The first thing I’ve noticed,while watching it,was that EA himself seems weak.He seems humbled,by the very presence of these incredible creatures,and then,is slowly lifted up by his successes.
I underwent the same thing yesternight.It made me feel…good.The ritual I performed last night,called to all the powers of magic,all the powers of who I was,and I’m actually shocked and,as EA,humbled by the transformation that went down.
I had my party,it was all fun.Prior to the party,I had a nosebleed.Instead of panicking and such,I took a small vial,and filled it with blood,knowing that I would just need it later on.
During the party,my shirt caught fire!Instead of panicking,I simply went into my shower and got it wet.That shirt,I now know,is consecrated.It’s powerful.It’s the second article of clothing I have that has been blessed by the very essence of darkness,and of light,to work these arcane rituals.I’m not gonna throw it away,because it radiates sheer power,just like a waistcoat I have,that I almost never wear in real life,that I simply know is something I could use in ritual.
A friend,during the party,was agitated.She was shy,and felt excluded,so I took her into a dark room,and taught her to meditate.Skeptical at first,I guided her through a less sinister version of the WoD meditation,and then through a simplified chakra opening meditation,after which,I showed her shamanic core-journeying,and got her to meet the deer,her spirit animal,before guiding her back out,and concluding with the Black Sun meditation and ‘‘in Darkness bound’’.
Yes,I know that’s a lot,but the reaction was incredible,because this person felt enlightened,and empowered greatly and basically utterly reanimated.During the party,I also exorcised King Paimon and the Darkness,and the thing that I noticed when doing that was something interesting.It was that I really didn’t feel different.I described not feeling very different when I was possessed,bu when it was all out of me,it still wasn’t different,which in my opinion,further solidifies my godly adepthood.
I also spoke to Habiba,the neighbor who died a few weeks ago that I talked about in Pact with Paimon.The whole thing was overall fun.The people there helped me clean it all up,and I am utterly shocked with how I’ve begun to view the world,seeing meaning,power,and inspiration in anything.
For example,at first,I was opposed to the way their Truth or Dare game went,since it seemed somewhat debauch,and such.But the more I looked into it,the more I realized that these complete strangers were bonding immensely the more the heat of the thing increased,and by the end of it,everyone was friends.
They also helped me clean everything up.No,I’m serious.But after it was done,and before my parents came,was when it got really weird.For starters I was in the rapture state,almost instantly.And it didn’t stop.I heard voices,and saw images.
However,I also felt that like I was crumbling,like I was cracking,and I did the Third Eye medtiation and I watched,the world around me crumble into nothingness.I did the whole Left Palm Chakra stuff Dante Abiel taught us,and I could lift the veil.
I stopped meditating and grounded myself by trying to watch TV.My TV was broken.My friend’s ex-boyfriend,an old acquaintance of mine,who was also good with technology had been doing some stuff around my television,so I called him.
When he did his thing,and the party was over,he reconnected everything.We knew the TV WAS WORKING.But somehow,it was now broken so he guided me to fixing it.A cable had left its place,but it was there when he was there.It’s as if the cable had slipped out,ON ITS OWN.As if,BY MAGIC.
First,he began to tell me about how much fun he had at the party.Then,he told me how it really healed him,since the break-up in question had occured only a week or so prior to the party.I really did help him.But he told me about morality,and then it turned away,to his low self-esteem(and he’s one of the most shameless people I know),his persistence,his philosophy,his ADHD which no one knows about,and a lot more.
As I talked to him more,I noticed how much our struggles matched,and how much they didn’t.I couldn’t divulge to him my magick,but as I talked to him more,I noticed that this kid,who grew up in a strict Muslim home,who I KNOW,THROUGH INTERACTION AND THROUGH DIVINATION,had NEVER picked up a grimoire in his life,had so much Left Hand Path-esque insight,that he helped me,an ACTUAL BLACK MAGICIAN,further refine my view on things.
After this,I talked to some other friends.I’ve received words of praise,and I’ve seen a lot of things happen.I also think that I’ve stopped egregorifying this one girl,into the idealistic,and started actually embracing her as just another human,which has done nothing to stop my crush,but has actually strengthened me to do something about it.And despite inviting her to my party,she couldn’t make it,she had other plans.
I’ve talked to others,and at 2:00 AM,when I was REALLY sleepy,I decided to try doing my ritual.In complete darkness,I stood there.I drew,in blood,a circle,and started breathing,but as I did I noticed,there was very little that could be done.
I called to all of the powers of magick,all of the powers within,and I expanded,I cracked,I burned,and I grew.I had taken on the mantle of the godform,and I proclaimed Feđa,the mortal,dead and (true name) the god,alive,in the manform of Feđa,the Titan in flesh.
It was crazy,what I did,how much I’ve affirmed my sheer dominion over this world,how much support I’ve had.This morning,even when faced with a mountain of homework,I manage to come here,and talk about my experience.Typing up this thread alone,has taken me the past 45 minutes or so,so you can see how shameless I am in spending my time,simple because I know that I will achieve everything.I have the time,I have the resources,I have the will,I have the love,I have everything,and I’m doing it.I’ve won every battle before even laying my hand on the sword.
How is that for ritualized success?
Now back on the subject of Gilgamesh,and the Epic in question,and ancient civilizations,you’ll notice that more or less everything there is guided by magic.Unlike the Iliad and the Odyssey,though,where everything is blamed and praised on the gods,here humans are doing so much of the work,in consultation with the gods.
Anyone in my school,who read it,would probably approach it from an Abrahamic perspective where merely calling these spirits gods is going to automatically assume that the people were at their mercy and power,but as a Pagan,I saw that necessarily isn’t the case,that these gods helped mortal kind so much.
I also had an interesting experience,when praying to Djehuty to help me study.A voice came onto em and said:’‘Trust me,you can bless yourself.’’
That’s also how I approached my studying.I meditated on it,and whenever I reached a point where I felt I couldn’t learn anymore,I meditated,and the blockage was cleared.
The bookshelf,that has Thoth bound to it,simply radiates his essence.Our pact is still in place,I feel myself learning.My pact with Baba Yaga has not ended.She has helped me access the fullest powers of black magic.My pact with Paimon has not ended,he’s helped me influence everything.
The more I work this the more I notice that dark magic isn’t dark because of the macabre tone of it,the use of blood,the black,nor of the fact that it takes place in darkness.It’s dark simply becasue we’ve grown to call it dark.It’s dark because it’s been hidden for too long.THe more this happens,the line between white magic and black magic fades,duality cripples…which also ties into my Godname,as this Godname represents an entity who has existed since before duality,and has almost no assumptions relating to it.
Food for thought?
Back to schoolwork.Tell me guys what you think of this nonsense.