So after doing alot of research about Lilith, her energy current/etc – I’ve started to set up well…a starter altar for her. It’s still being built. I can’t have anything like her sigil out in plain view in my room. Since certain family members are less then accepting. I did still draw her sigil on the altar table though, and opened it. Just covered that with a purple cloth (heard she likes purple) so it’s not obvious.
I’ve been invoking, drawing art that is representative of her (in a symbolic way) to leave as an offering to her, and just kinda writing “letters” to start off with. My interest is to work with her on self love, self confidence, and generally building myself up to be less anxious, more assertive and things like that. Seeing as my household situation, I really need to be more assertive and learn to sometimes put my well being first.
I’m just getting started (been sorta putting off working directly with any spirit but eventually decided this would be good for me to do). Right now my goal is to build a relationship stronger connection. Although I have noticed I’m slowly becoming more confident (SLOWLY)…which is good.
*Reason why I was putting off working with spirits/entities, was because it may sound dumb but social anxiety. Well anxiety in general. Any type of communication/interaction I tend to procastinate…for me evoking feels “formal” and that’s gets the same reaction that job interviews, or other formal mudane things get…tons of anxiety.
I’m a Veteran with severe PTSD, along with general anxiety and depression issues…so I totally understand about having issues communicating with people…but ever since I’ve started working with spirits, I find it’s almost theraputic. I don’t have to put on a show, I don’t have to worry about being judged or laughed at (except when I bug Belial about a person he doesn’t care too much for in my life) and I feel once you get started on your journey with Lilith, you’ll see there really was nothing to worry about.
Yeah, with my anxiety ive noticed even when just trying to chant enns, or anything (even if by myself) my voice is real soft/ goes mute. It may also be a self esteem or another issue to. That’s why I prefer things where I say anything I need to mentally and not verbally because I’ve (right now) got very little confidence in myself.
It’s frustrating to say the least. So then for me having to evoke (and I am sensitive to energy so I can FEEL their presence with me) is very anxiety provoking and I struggle to communicate or get nervous. Rituals are a whole other thing. That’s like a presentation for me.
Everyone has to start somewhere. Sometimes a person has to seek out Lilith. The rare few that Lilith seeks out herself. It takes a certain common ground to spark her to come to you in those cases though. She is the interesting blend of lover and warrior. Even I was a little hesitant to interact with her at first. But after researching about her and understanding her, it makes sense how she came to me.
I’ve had an entity with me throughout my life, but I don’t think that was her. I think I’ve been interacted in life/and dreams with the succubus entity and another one who seems to try and guide me. That one I feel a bond/connection to, as well the succubus because I’m starting to bond more with her, and get better at communication.
The other one has been more so a watcher/guide and borderline somewhat lover (been a few suggestive moments) but more like a parent/guide/teacher figure for me.
Even if it isn’t Lilith directly, a succubus is more often than not a daughter of Lilith. I haven’t heard of stories saying otherwise at least. Come to think of it, I think almost if not all succubi are daughters of Lilith. Lilith passes her spirit and knowledge on to her daughters in various ways. Chances are that she has a systematic connection with them as well. Succubi are generally the most passionate entities I’ve ever dealt with, also the most dominant as well.
I’m not sure if the other entity is a succubus (I don’t think so), that one I have alittle more history with (which I’m still trying to figure out alot of it).
I also have a necklace (the astrological symbol associated with Lilith - crescent moon with upside-down cross) that I’m wearing now.
I cant wear it in view because of my sister, and grandparents unfortunately so I wear it under my shirt. I’m also going to buy a sigil necklace (for Lilith), and open that the way you would with any of her Sigils to further welcome her/her energies into my life.
They can be intense and interesting either way. A succubus is very versatile and can serve as a multi-role lover and priestess. 2 of the 5 that I have are of priestess-lover mindsets. The other 3 are kinky lovers that boost morale and spiritual warrior insight.
I have two sigil rings, one for either persona that they have.
Believe me, I know the feeling all too well. Lilith has possibly the strongest hold of any female deity or goddess that I’ve ever encountered. It’s pretty commonplace among many schools of thought as well.
I never read about Lilith until someone told me that she wanted to be my matron. I was very confused because I never looked into her before, so I bought a book on working with her and then formally accepted her as my matron.
I feel like I get to know her better every day. I have an altar to her that I’ve been building on. I feel my sex drive is back to what it used to be before drugs and depression fucked it up. She has been helping me battle an eating disorder and body dysphoria as well as tapping into my divine femininity.
She is a great comfort to have in my life. She teaches me so much.
I have always been unconscious drawn toward the dark goddess, Lilith ever since I were little. Considering that whenever i watches an anime or comic I always felt drawn toward the dark character whatever they were evil, or good its didn’t matter.
I’ve always been drawn to darkness in general. When watching movies, wearing dark clothing (recently trying to change that), my room is the darkest in the house (even with lights on), which is comfortable for me, being drawn to shadows, night,etc.
