Starting get really frusturated


#1

So I’ve been doing everything I can to show myself I can work with spirits through evocation.Meditation,energy exercises,and I’ve been working with Sastan for four months now and am seeing hardly any results in my vision into the spiritual realms.
I’m able to see aura like colors that pop out of nowhere even when I’m not in trance.

I don’t get why the spirits aren’t helping me with this.
I’ve had some things happen that show me the spirits are there but these things aren’t happening to me it’s happening to other people.

I’ve offered sacrifices,prayersorations,and given thanks to the spirits even if nothing happened

Can somebody give me some advice on this?
I’been practicing majick for almost two years and feel like I should have made more progress than this,and I’m seriously at my wits end.
There’s nothing more in life that I desire than to become a living God.
I’m starting to feel like my constant failure is affecting my self-esteem,but I always go into ritual with the intent of success,but I feel like the spirits are ignoring me when I feel no presence or have no results.
I’m starting to feel like the impressions I receive from the spirits are just mental jerkin.


#2

Yep. I’m with you on this. I bought the Mastering Evocation course when it came out (July last year, I think) and have been practicing sigil magick and scrying ever since. Not every day, but almost. Never mind full blown evocation, I would be ecstatic if I could see and hear spirits in a scrying mirror, but it just hasn’t happened. Sorry, but the way EA talks about how close you are to making tangible contact with spirits when you can enter TGS, get the sigil flashing etc…well, I am no closer now than I was when I started back in July.

When I started this BALG stuff, I could almost immediately open sigils and enter TGS. One of the first sigils I worked with was Thalos for astral projection, and that night had the best AP I had had for a long time. I really felt like I was on to something amazing and life changing, but tangible success has since been far too thinly spread. I am really envious of the BALG members who can just summon spirits into visible appearance before them and learn from them in a meaningful way (i.e. hear them). But I just can’t and its now starting to piss me off! I’m starting to get sick of the sight of ‘static rain’!


#3

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#4

Sevarn, OP wanted some love because he’s feeling depressed not having real success with spirits and you reply taling your story with spirits lol

Not sure this is what he wanted to hear :slight_smile:


#5

I’m trying to inspire! I am a terrible public speaker!


#6

Weren’t you just telling us how you DID get real, tangible results? Why aren’t you focusing on what you did right instead of what you are doing wrong?

Did you do more preparatory immersion with the spirit when you got results? Did you invoke Godhood in a longer ritual? Did you take the time to get to know the spirit you wanted to talk to before-hand through research & divinations? Etc…etc…etc…

Look, I think there’s only a handful of people here that get full-blown physical manifestations at this point, and kudos to them, maybe one day it’ll happen for me, for now I’m more than happy with purple astral outlines & voices in my head lol. From what I gather seeing the entity can take years and years of patience, but if I’m getting tangible results in the real world through my practices, FFS man go with it!

Fake it till you make it bro(as Sevarn has said)!

Oh…and I do notice you are a chronic ‘system jumper’, so maybe picking one or two as supplements to E.A.'s methods, instead of jumping between 100 different ones, thereby mastering none, would be useful.

I know for me my Quabalistic Mini-Rituals & Meditative practices have exploded my results with the Goetics, using mainly E.A.'s methods from E.E & the Evocation course(with a sprinkling of R.O’s & Donald Kraig’s stuff). IMHO, KNOWING YOURSELF through meditation is ‘key’ to getting an entity to work with you. ‘Who are you puny mortal to call me? Ohhh…you’re a genuine child of God realizing his divinity? Why the fuck didn’t you say so, grab a seat and hold on to the handlebars, Kansas is going bye-bye’.


#7

musta, if I may suggest my advice if you care to hear it.

You seem to be on the right track. When the light goes out you kinda trip over the ottoman a few times before you find the switch. Dont let that bruise on your shin qualify as failure in your results at least you have a reference point and closer you the switch. Does that make sense?

So you have some throwed off emotions, cool that life. Use that energy to your advantage. Focus more on your energy and balance it out. Take stock in what you are doing and what you attach yourself to. A little self discipline goes a long way. Would you see any benefit to this?


#8

Yeah I’ve found myself using my anger as a catalyst but I don’t want to offend the spirits.
@Savarn,
How long did it take you to start seeing spirits?
I’m a “seeing is believing kind of guy” which might be my downfall.

Oh and Gnosis,
As far as prepatory imersian goes when I used Bune to manifest $1600 all I did was pick a spirit and opened his sigil in the bathroom on my lunch break at work lol.
But your right.I just pick a spirit and call it sovI should practice more on PI.

Anybody know of any resources to learn about spirits more in depth?


#9

I still can’t see spirits with my physical eyes. I can see them through my third eye, and if they pass within about 5 or so feet of my armor an alarm switches on. I’ve heard spirits, felt them, and communicated telepathically with them, I’ve seen their shadows and outlines, and full apparitions in the third eye.

But physical eyes? I just see shadows and outlines.


#10

Im with you guys on the astral impressions. Seeing shit dart off in your side vision, feeling different energies at odd times of the day. Bizarre dreams. Something I kind of have to ask. Is this normal? Is it a psychological imbalance? All questions I address in my journal. Before too long people close to you seem to distance themselves. Any of this sound familiar?

Musta, if anger is your catalyst try to perfect it. Is your frustration a side effect?

I never seen a physical manifestation that was clear to my physical eyes except from what I said above. I kinda put my confidence in strong yes. As far as my astral eyes, yes. But I can see it building up from there so im not fucked up about it, I know it will come.

I get results and I put my stock in that and not doubt myself.


#11

Sadly, yes. People close to me do seem to distance themselves whenever I’m in the middle of Working. Darting shit is the most common for me. Personally, my anger is no catalyst for most workings, it is my loneliness and my desire to use it.

If someone like me, overweight, with a terrible immune system, living in his mother’s house, can become a frenzy of vampiric energy, I’ll believe in anything.


#12

anger isnt my strong point either. But being well equipt in all aspects of emotion so to talk about one, kinda opens questions for others. Its musta’s thread so I wanted to give him what advice I can.

Being acclimated to energy and its effects can be sort of a tight rope. Vampirism didnt appeal to me. Kinda seems too McDonalds for my taste and I hate McD’s. So I try to go to the source. I could be dead wrong, im cool with that.

Severn there is a quote from a Tool song that comes to mind.

“silly monkeys, dont you know that heaven has enough mana to go around.” Right in Two is the name of the song. May have slaughtered the quote but the songs seems relevant to our conversation. I guess what I’m saying is that pure energy is pure energy.


#13

Human energy is potent energy, king. It can act as a harbor for the ultimate Universal Energy, which can be used for literally anything, and human energy has a ton of different aspects to it. I mostly look for lifeforce, because who the hell needs their gnosis, or their happiness, or their fear?

I look to kill them with my workings, I don’t intend to help them!

I’ll look the song up. Sounds interesting.


#14

[quote=“Musta_Krackish, post:8, topic:2657”]As far as prepatory imersian goes when I used Bune to manifest $1600 all I did was pick a spirit and opened his sigil in the bathroom on my lunch break at work lol.
But your right.I just pick a spirit and call it sovI should practice more on PI.[/quote]

But that means you found a demon that wants to work with you.
What if you continue focusing on this Demon and open his sigil regularly to make contact?
I don’t know if that is best for you, it is only an idea;
For myself I have found that things work better when I expand on what is working easier first.


#15

One to mull over, ladies and gentlemen: why did the ancients (who weren’t cursed with a materialistic skeptical culture in the way we are) provide images, idols, statues etc for the spirits of their gods to live in?

Surely a kick-ass priest evoking Amon or Isis or Zeus would have needed no statues at all, because the gods would appear physically in front of them IF evocation into a physical form was the One True Method?

You might as well insist spirits are only “real” if they take a dump in your bathroom that leaves skidmarks, and leave an empty bunch of food wrappers on your kitchen table, that’s as ridiculously small-minded as insisting on seeing them in a certain way.

As far as I’m aware, no-one has yet Skyped an evocation that has a spirit so tangibly material that everyone else can see it - there’s always the caveat of also needing to be in TG synch to perceive the forms in the smoke, or the scrying tool.

Also, if a being has to be able to make a materially tangible form in order to be effective, why do we humans - the most materially tangible spiritual beings - need the UN-embodied entities to help us?

Surely it would be the other way round - all those poor bodiless entities asking us “real” material beings with mass and physical heft to help them do things?

Spirits making bodies out of smoke that you can see in an altered state is all well and good but it is NOT the only way, and it’s not the only way to get results, either - as your $1600 proved.

Oh, and before some jackass pipes up that “She’s only saying because she can’t evoke to physical form,” I have evoked some entities to a form where I can actually touch them, and they can touch me, but that’s a phenomena and NOT “the only true way” or anything of that kind.

I’ve also taken hallucinogens and physically seen and heard things that weren’t there - one of them was Paul Newman ffs - this pre-ocupation with the physical senses being satisfied is a bit of a red herring, because they can also be tricked by the imagination or a mild imbalance of brain chemistry.


#16

It’s more like “as long as Mom doesn’t interrupt my summoning of entities to devour them”.