Spirit Ex Lovers? Question out of pure curiosity

So I’ve heard, and learned from first hand experience about how similar spirit relationships (romantic ones specifically) are to human relationships. I’m also aware, and personally believe their more “deep” then human relationships as the spirit (lover) can see through me (subconsciously/energetically) where as a human partner’s “sight” is more limited to what you present TO them, and what they can see on their own.

This of course isn’t true, but for me personally and my own lover, I feel she understands me better then my own family, at times. That doesn’t mean it’s a roses, and clouds as with every relationship there are differences, ups and downs, etc to work through. However it does feel like a deeper bond, then I’ve known from any physical lover.

Now I’ve read ALOT of experiences about people in loving relationships with spirits/gods/demons/goddesses/deities/etc…and was wondering, since I find the relationships similar enough (spirit vs Physical) – have people dealt with Ex’s - or issues after a breakup (as not all relationships work out)?

I haven’t heard much on this matter and it did strike me as curious, I know a spirit can get jelous and was wondering about if anyone’s ever had issues with, well a spirit ex lover…

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Everytime I broke up with one of my ubis (happened to me a lot when I was younger as I thought they were not working, when it was my fault for not having developed my astral senses and personality enough, I’m a firm believer that the majority of problems with ubis are because the human is and idiot), I always reconciliated with them

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Well I’ve noticed that most of the issues people face with spirits are one, yes people being idiots/not prepared/only wanting sex/lack of communication/misunderstandings/etc.

Theirs also the issue that some people can’t tell the difference between a parasite and a spirit lover, such as a incubi/succubi (although ANYTHING can be parasitic - including humans)

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I think there is nothing wrong with only wanting sex. In Crowley’s Qabalah, the concept of “marriage” is an euphemism for “coitus”. It would be horrid is all interactions had to be full romantic in order to have coitus.
About the parasites thing, people here take that as a category of spirit.

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Well for me personally, I need an emotional connection to even consider sex. Also if someone just wanted me for sexual reasons, I would take that as a huge insult.

I’m aware that parasites are also a “catagory” of spirits. The astral “bugs”/thoughtforms/etc. However I also see it as a type of behavior as well.

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It depends whether giving what you are giving is detrimental to you or not. Sometimes I let my ubis eat my energy during the day, an incubus of mine likes to chew my aura. I’ve also found the point where they like sexual energy the most, and I often give them the energy instead of using it for my purposes, one could say that they have such behavior, but I don’t mind, which makes my HGA quite angry sometimes, as he sees that they should fast

If I were to gauge the spirits I’ve dealt with, I would have to say that if they only wanted sex and nothing else, they are a thoughtform or parasite. If they want both sex and to pass on some intense knowledge to me, it is a mutual benefit.

However, the catch with parasites is if they provoke enough sexual energy and breed, they manage to multiply like lice.

Best advice I can give is do a ritual to your patron figurehead and request a spirit spouse that fits your personal preferences and agenda. Otherwise, you’re just as comparable to going to a spiritual brothel complete with STD’s(Spiritually Transmitted Diseases).

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I’ve noticed my lover is quite touchy/feely with me, which in the beginning was quite a shock to me and I didn’t take it well (I didn’t summon/do letter of intent – she I suspect has been around most/all of my life).

Now im used to it, and have laid out clear boundaries. I also don’t feel tired/drained like how I did when her and I first interacted, and she lets me sleep now!

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She doesn’t only want sex, she’s very touchy but also emotionally expressive as well. Also I don’t think she is a thoughtform. Before her and I were interacting like now, I used to see orb activity (with my eyes), footsteps, knocking on walls, dream visitations + one sleep paralysis experience and one time she smacked my bed (on mattress) when I was on my bed. Felt and heard it.

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I don’t know who my matron/patron would be.

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I’ve found that for some reason, people in this forum think that sex by itself is a sin, which is weird considering the religion of the company. I’ve had that discussion before with other users, and it was frowned that my main reason for having ubis is sex, and that that was the reason of why one of them came to me and others were summoned by me along the years. I don’t want to argue, is just that I find it curious, maybe it’s because people have been hurt by human relationships and want a safe space where things are as romantic as they have dreamed.
If you are after knowledge from these entities, a good exercise is to interpret holy texts with them, it is a rich experience if you have more than one. A good book for this is “Liber AL vel Legis”, having a physical copy and taking them outside and asking them “what do you think about this verse?”, or making them talk to you through the book (it works better with the Bible), are good exercises

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I have 2 exes in the spirit world. Really neither have given me much troubpe after the fact but the first one pretty much dropped me out of his life due to his own problem, so that hurt for a while.

My current spirit husband though i feel such a deep bond with that ive never felt with anyone else, to the point i havent wanted a “earthly” relationship anymore. We have had ups and downs before like any other relationship. In the end he’s always here for me and has proven that through really tough times. I know he hates my exes i once saw him get in a fight with the first one as backlash for how that one hurt me

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I see that as a form of monasticism, you deserve a robe with symbols of your current, like the schema monks

Like those ones

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I had an incubus, who left without telling me anything - didn’t have the ‘balls’ to break it off or say anything to me, he just fucked off and never came back/‘ghosted’ me, and to my understanding he didn’t like me nor was interested in me anyway either which he could’ve said so anyways, and during the whole ‘relationship’ he didn’t really communicate to me either, and rarely if ever showed himself to me (think I only saw him twice), and the whole ‘intimate’ part - never saw him during that either, and it felt very detached and not very ‘passionate’ tbh, so I guess some spirits may not be interested and do that whole ‘lover’ thing (prob w ubi more) out of obligation, I did do the letter method to Lilith - even wrote down I was looking for a romantic thing but it didn’t go anywhere which I am still pissed off about but finally trying to get over it now, or just rather forcing myself to not care about it anymore bc as much as I did want that, he just didn’t - or atleast I get the impression he didn’t - I don’t truly really know, and I’ve tried to get some closure and clarity on it from other spirits but no responses so I’ve given up on that now and finding out. But personally that experience has just put me off having any kind of relationship with a spirit and that experience has now triggered off my abandonment and rejection issues/sensitivity so it has put me off a whole lot with that, I get sometimes things might not work out but I was upset bc it felt like he couldn’t be bothered with me to begin with, and ended up leaving w/o so much as a goodbye, to me it was a really cruel and inconsiderate thing to do and felt like he didn’t even care, I knew someone who had started a relationship with a demon (not a ubi to my knowledge) and it seemed like they were possibly interested in this person but then they left w/o a word, and never came back, so I guess that does happen. I think it sucks that one person may want that relationship and the spirit doesn’t in the end, and leaves like it meant nothing. So i’m skeptical about if spirits really feel that deeply towards humans, bc of my personal experiences, but I haven’t experienced any kind of ‘deep’ bond with any spirit so I can’t really make that assumption, but again, like I said, now it has put me off ever trying that with another spirit.

@Mind_Seeker20 I’m pretty sure that if your spirit is a succubus or anything of the likeness, it would stand to reason that your matron is Lilith. I’m not too familiar with anyone else. The beautiful thing about a succubus is they are very insightful and intense. Their emotional capacity is utterly bonkers and ballistic.

@MagusOfGamaliel I’m not one to consider sex as a sin. It’s just that the common consensus of people in society these days is that sex is a one-track concept. Basically, the whole “one night stand is a tease” theory is what I was trying to get at. I’m looking into getting the “Liber AL vel Legis” in physical text. I just have it open in a browser window at the moment.

Also, the term “ubis” is new to me.

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I’ve seen some people using it here, and I find it cool because it is a short way of saying “succubi and incubi”

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Yess i need such a robe XD

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I haven’t completely identified what type of spirit she is. There’s alot of similarities with her and other experiences I’ve read/heard about people and a succubus/Incubi. However I can’t be to sure.

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My former SL and I did break up. She still has my back and I have hers but things get awkward at times especially when we meet the SL I’m vibing with right now.

Both are really loving and comforting towards me. The first helped me with some sexual healing and encouraged me to explore my darker side. My current one wants to take things slow and saved my ass a few nights ago.

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Succubi are very adaptive. They can change appearance and even forge male anatomy upon themselves at any given moment(to put it censored). Like humans, it depends on their mood as to how they plan or wish to appear to you. Depending on how early it is in your relationship, they may reveal their total nature to you soon. In the early stage of a relationship, mystery is their focal point to see how much you and her mold towards each other.

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